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‘I’m so sorry this happened, Jamie.’ There was nothing else that she could say, no way to make sense of it all. Maybe just being here was enough.
It seemed enough, for this moment at least. They sat in silence, holding hands. It felt as if there was a measure of healing there, but there had to be more than this if Jamie was ever going to truly leave this behind.
‘Could I suggest something?’
He smiled. ‘Go ahead. I’m out of ideas in finding a way forward.’
‘You haven’t talked much about this, have you?’
There was a flash of understanding in Jamie’s eyes. ‘There are counsellors attached to my charity. I never really got around to talking to any of them...’
‘They might not be the best people to talk to, you know them and have a relationship with them outside the counselling sessions. Jon’s benefitted from the sessions he’s had here, at the clinic.’
‘You think I should take part in his sessions?’ Jamie shook his head. ‘I’m pretty sure that neither of us are quite ready for that.’
‘I don’t imagine you are. But maybe if you talk to someone here, who’s working within the same framework as his counsellor, that might turn into a reconciliation network for you both. When you and Jon are ready.’
Jamie thought for a moment. ‘It...makes sense. It might work. Nothing ventured, I suppose...’
‘And you both have a lot to gain. Even if you can’t truly forgive him, at least you might know a bit more about what happened and how you feel about it. And you’ll have tried.’ Anna smiled at him. ‘Made the best of what you have.’
‘Now you’re throwing my own words at me.’ Jamie’s charity was all about teenagers making the best of themselves. ‘Don’t you have any scruples at all?’
Anna chuckled. ‘No. Not many.’
None at all when it came to Jamie. Right now, she’d do anything to help him feel better about this.
‘It’s a good idea and I’ll think about it. Very seriously.’ He gave her hand a squeeze and Anna squeezed back. ‘Where are you, in all of this?’
That was a question that bore thinking about.
‘Practically speaking... Our tissue viability nurse can deal with Jon’s burns, and now that we’ve delayed surgery I’ll be taking a step back. I’d like to speak to Dr Lewis and make it formal that I’m no longer Jon’s surgeon.’
Jamie knew what that meant. She still had a duty of care to Jon because he was a patient at the clinic, but she was more free to dictate the nature of her relationship with him.
‘And...’ He was still uncertain. Jamie needed her to say this.
‘It means I have no part in Jon’s counselling or yours. I’m just your friend.’
His moss-green eyes became suddenly luminescent. Slowly Jamie raised her hand and even though his lips barely touched her fingers the effect was electric.
‘There’s no just about having you as a friend.’
* * *
Jamie was sitting in the cafeteria with a young girl of around ten. Young lady described her better. Her dark hair was done in a neat plait and she wore a pink sweatshirt with matching pink baseball boots and jeans. A pretty blue backpack hung over the back of her seat, and both she and Jamie were sipping their drinks from cups and saucers. A book with a sparkly pink cover lay on the table between them.
It looked like the kind of conversation that shouldn’t be interrupted, and Anna decided to collect her coffee and drink it in her office. But Jamie saw her and raised his hand, beckoning her over.
‘Anna, this is Jessica. Will you join us?’
Jamie’s invitation was obviously sincere, and Jessica turned and smiled too. Anna pulled up a chair and sat down.
‘Hi, Jessica. I’m Anna.’
‘Anna’s my friend,’ Jamie explained to Jessica, who nodded, taking the information at face value even if it prompted a small quiver in Anna’s heart. ‘Jess is Caroline’s eldest.’
‘We’re having tea.’ The tone of Jess’s voice indicated that this was an established ritual between Jamie and his niece. ‘It’s nice to have an adult conversation sometimes.’
