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Mom staying with me has helped so much. With her experience and knowledge, she suggests we work on getting Emmy to sleep for longer stretches by recommending we bathe her at night and then finish with two feeds. Mom said that the first feed after a bath is usually short because the baby is too tired. The downfall, the baby will wake up really hungry in a few hours.
So that’s what we do, bathe Emmy around seven in the evening followed by a quick feed so she sleeps to about eleven. When she wakes around that time, she drinks much more, which changes the way she sleeps. We’ve started noticing she goes straight through until about four in the morning, giving me some relief.
“No wonder you had four kids,” I utter to Mom as we sit on the sofa while I feed Emmy. “You’re a pro at this. Just getting those few extra hours of sleep feels like heaven.”
“It’ll get easier when you have more kids.”
“More kids?” I raise my brows, then tuck in my upper lip. “I think I’m done.”
Mom chuckles softly. “That’s what every woman says. Just wait. One day you’ll surprise yourself when you yearn to hold a baby in your arms, and you miss the newborn smell.”
Leaning in, I inhale Emmy’s scent. Something about it is so pure, a mix of baby products and something else I can’t quite figure out.
“I guess you have to be married to make that happen for the second time.”
Mom wraps her hand around the warm cup, blowing the steam away to take a sip of her coffee. God, what I’d give for coffee right now.
“Austin is a good man and a great father,” she begins with, then stalls, waiting for my reaction. “You know I’ve always been fond of him, and your father respects Austin.”
“But?”
“No buts, honey. I just want you to know that whichever way you decide to take your relationship with Austin, we’re here to support you.”
My gaze falls upon Emmy, the sweet little angel in my arms. She’s grown a lot and making these cute sounds which sometimes can sound like she’s sighing.
“He’s a good guy, great, in fact. It’s just not that easy, Mom. There are so many things going on, not to mention Millie's history with him. I just think our emotions can sometimes be clouded amongst the chaos.”
Mom nods quietly, her eyes brightening as she appears to be reflecting.
“My entire life has been chaos since the moment I fell in love with your father. Nothing we did was conventional. We didn’t date, as you know, he was my best friend's older brother and married at the time. Then, eight years later, when our paths crossed, I was engaged to Julian. Our timing was never right, but perhaps in hindsight, it’s what tested our strength and willingness to fight for one another.”
“But did you doubt yourself? Wondering if you were worthy of the man you fell in love with?”
A fond smile spreads across Mom’s face. “I mean, all the time. The great Lex Edwards? C’mon, every woman wants him. So, why me? What made me so special?”
“I’m sure, if you ask Dad… ” I say with a smile, then continue, “… he’d say, the great Charlotte Mason? Why would she want a controlling and jealous billionaire like me?”
We both laugh, releasing a sigh at the same time.
“God, he loves you, Mom. I’ve never ever seen him even bat an eye or look at another woman. He worships the ground you walk on. When you’ve grown up watching how a man should treat a woman, it sets your own expectations really high.”
“Your father and I aren’t perfect. We’ve grown together. But, Ava, you must understand that fairy tales are just that. Love can be hard work. Sometimes, when we love so hard, we make wrong decisions. My point is, don’t be afraid to give your heart away, but also don’t expect that if you do, it’s a guaranteed happily ever after. You’ve got to fight hard, and that’s what will strengthen the bond between you and the man you love. Just like when you see him fighting just as hard for you.”
Mom gives me a lot to think about, and perhaps what she says is true. I’ve grown up reading fairy tales, thinking that once you fall in love, it’s a guaranteed happily ever after. The hard work is done, right?
But those closest to me are prime examples of how falling in love isn’t easy. Will and Millie’s story sticks out the most, mainly because it doesn’t feel like so long ago. Things would have been a lot different if they didn’t break up and Will didn’t move to London. Though, just like Mom said, they fought hard to be together, and it was all about timing, especially for them.
During Mom’s stay, I welcome our chats over tea and coffee. However, with Austin working nights and sometimes double shifts, he usually only has an hour to spend with Emmy before going home to crash. I begin to see
just how exhausted he is, and so with that, I don’t put any pressure on him to talk about us so he can focus on bonding with Emmy.
Yet like all good things, Mom needs to go home. So with her bags packed, she extends her arms to bring me in for a hug.
“I’m going to miss you, Mom. This whole parent gig is full-on.”
“You’re telling me, kid,” she answers with a grin. “Twenty-five years later, and I’m still fussing over you.”
“Twenty-six next week.”
