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“We’ll get through this. We did it once, and we can do it again.”
As I say the words, my phone vibrates.
“Someone really wants your attention.” He laughs.
I pull out my phone and read the text, my heart leaping out of my mouth.
Charlotte: ANSWER YOUR FUCKING PHONE MY WATER JUST BROKE!
It’s showtime.
Fuck, I’m not ready.
I’m going to be a father.
Me, Lex Edwards, has to take care of a baby. What the hell do I know about babies?
“Lex, are you okay? You look… pale.”
“The baby… it’s coming.”
Elijah’s eyes widen as he stands, throwing some bills onto the table.
“In the words of Rocky, let’s get the hell out of here, dude.”
CHARLIE
It starts off as your typical Friday night.
I’m watching a movie with Eric and Kate. It’s our third Magic Mike night, the first two being screenings at the cinema. We have our buffet of fried chicken, pizza, Mexican, and desserts sitting on the coffee table in front of us. In support of my pregnant state, we all drink mocktails, but I swear Eric’s has the stench of vodka seeping through it. When I ask him if that’s a flask in his pants or is he just happy to see me, he replies with “both.”
With Nikki and Will away at her mom’s, Lex left us to go to Rocky’s, no doubt to watch porn. Nikki once told me that every time they are gone, the boxes of tissues somehow disappeared from their apartment.
The image instantly needs erasing from my mind.
So, watching extremely hot men dance on stage is a sure way to get the fire started below. I’m surprised when I feel how soaked my panties are. Geez, pregnancy hormones are seriously out of control. I text Lex to get his ass back home because if I am this wet, he sure as hell needs to
take care of it.
It’s somewhere toward the end where I begin to feel uncomfortable. My third trimester has been smooth sailing so far, and I still have weeks before this baby will make its grand entrance. I can’t quite understand exactly why, and embarrassed with my panty predicament, I’m not sure how to explain it to Eric and Kate.
Yeah, okay, Matt Bomer dressed as Ken does things down below which should be illegal, but nevertheless, it’s just a movie, and again, have you seen my husband? I’m not one to hold my thoughts in, but this is highly embarrassing, so in typical Eric fashion, I blurt it out, “Right, I’m so soaked right now, I swear a tsunami just flooded my channels.”
Eric chokes on his burrito. “God, Charlie, do you need a TENA? Is it Channing in that combat outfit?”
Kate pipes in, “Oh, I bet it was Mickey Rourke.”
“Hate to break it to you guys, but I don’t know. It’s weird. I mean, yeah, they are all hot, but I wasn’t horny looking at them. Maybe my vagina has expanded, and I can no longer feel horny?”
“Wait. Your vagina expands?” Eric asked.
“Eric, did you not learn this in high school? How else does the baby come out?” Kate questions.
“Kate, how many times do I need to tell you that I’m not a vagina expert? The whole thing scares me like paranormal activity.”
“How is a vagina related to paranormal activity?” Both Kate and I are barely able to hold in the laughter. However, I can’t ignore the slight stomach ache I get from eating another burrito. Seriously, like every time I eat a jalapeno.
“Well, for starters, there’s mucus and periods,” Eric points out.
