AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Her shoulders ball up around her ears which is a sign that she’s uncomfortable. I hate making her feel that way when she’s so shy as it is, but sometimes I don’t have a choice. I need to push her out of her shell to get something real from her. Her emotions are hard to penetrate.
“I don’t know, all of it.” She peers up at me under her eyelashes. “Getting an apartment, living alone, having a job and paying for stuff, doing normal things, then people too.”
Ah, I can sense that we’re getting into the root of the problem here! Of course it’s people, she doesn’t do too well with others. She’s so closed off that it might put people off of her. They might not see her as someone worth their time and effort to get to know.
“Friends?” I ask while pretending to write something down. “Is that what you mean?”
“Friends, coworkers, people on the street, people who work in shops, you know… other things.”
I’m sure here she means boyfriends and connections with men but I cannot start that conversation without her instigating it fully. Not when I already feel like I can’t totally trust my own words. I’m so afraid of overstepping that mark that I chose to say nothing at all.
“This is stuff that everyone has to navigate when they get into the real world, however they get there. Even the most street wise of people struggle to adjust to living alone, paying bills, and work. That’s a very natural fear, and it’s also something that’s very easily overcome by doing it.”
“But most people have been to a normal school,” she replies quietly. “They’ve been around various different people having these experiences all this time. I haven’t exactly had a normal teenage life. Or life before that, if I’m totally honest with you. That scares me.”
The fact that she’s admitted that aloud is huge. Her words make my heart race in my chest because it’s something of a break through. “I know you haven’t,” I answer her in the calmest tone of voice that I can manage. “But most people don’t have a totally normal childhood. I think that you assume everyone else has had a smooth life, but they haven’t. Yes, you’ve been educated here where you can be protected, but that doesn’t mean you’ve missed out.”
As I say those words I think about my own childhood and I know that I’m lying. I had a very rambunctious fun time at school, hooking up, partying, having lots of fun. Yes, I learned lots too, but most of my learning came from my social life. I can see better why Pru is so worried when I think of it like that. My heart goes out to her as I realize there isn’t much I can do to bring the past few years back for her. Her asshole father who beat her up and put her in the hospital took that all away from her and there isn’t any getting it back. It’s horrible to think of how she is stuck now.
“I guess I just don’t know if I’m ready,” Pru sighs. As she fiddles with her fingers I wish I could read her mind to see what she’s panicking about. “I want to be ready because I don’t want to end up stuck here in a rut because of fear, but I don’t know if I am. How do you think I can tell that I am?”
“I suppose you could so some research. I don’t often like to tell people to start researching online because it can be a real nightmare, but I think maybe you should. If you look up jobs and apartments in the area and ways to plan out your budget, you might feel much more prepared. I know that it won’t give you advice on everything, but it’s a start. If you get more versed in the practical side of things then maybe the rest of it won’t be so daunting. You can focus on it more.”
Pru chews down on her bottom lip as she considers my words and she nods. “Yeah, okay. Maybe you’re right. I don’t ever spend much time online because it’s hard to get the tablets off the other kids but I’ll do what I can. Maybe if they realize I’m going, it’ll be easier.”
I don’t know if she’s right. Some of the kids have reacted to their personal trauma by becoming louder and obnoxious. I don’t blame them, that’s probably the way that I’d be if I went through some of the things that they have, but the children
like Pru get swallowed up in all of that.
“That’s a good idea and I might even put out a request that you get the tablet for research reasons. If I make the demand then maybe it’ll be listened to.” I let out a little chuckle and shake my head. “Although I don’t think Leah will listen much to me either.”
“Thank you.” I hope the flush in Pru’s cheeks now is more because of happiness and a sense of confidence than embarrassment. “That’s great, it means a lot to me.”
I hold her gaze for a moment, swimming in the blueness of her eyes. I’m struck, like I often am by her beauty. She holds a prettiness that I haven’t seen in other women before. I’ve found them attractive and obviously sexy, but Pru is different. There’s an aura around her that’s unique.
“Right, well I suppose I better get on. I know you’re a busy man.” Pru pushes herself into a standing position and straightens her skirt down her long legs. “But thank you as always, and I’ll see you next week? Same time on Monday? Is that right, I haven’t checked the schedule yet?”
“Actually, I think I’d like to see you again this week.” If she’s going soon I want to spend as much time with her as possible. “I have a free space on Friday if that’s okay with you?”
“What time?” I don’t know if I imagine it, but her eyes seem to light up.
“Four PM? Just before I leave for the weekend?” She nods eagerly, her hair bouncing up and down as she does. I love seeing her lovely happy face, it makes me smile. “Great. See you then.”
“Bye, Pru. You take care of yourself, okay?”
“I will,” she almost whispers. “And you.”
When she swishes out my office and she shuts the door behind her, I lean back in my chair and think for a few moments. There has to be some way I can help her, something I can do. I feel like it’s my duty to do this for Pru. I’ve seen her journey this far, and I don’t want to leave her all alone now.
Maybe I shouldn’t be thinking this way, maybe I’ve done what I need to do and I have to let her go, but I don’t think I can do this. Is this something I can ask any of my work colleagues about or will they think it’s me getting too close? I don’t want to be seen as someone weird…
Urgh, this is idiotic. I shake my head. What am I worrying for? Pru will be fine.
I imagine her tackling the world well, becoming a strong and confident career woman with a husband and children, and I know that she can have that if she wants it. It’ll be weird to think of her surviving in the world without my help, but I suppose that’ll happen eventually.
I’ll just have to keep working here and helping out other kids. It’ll be fine.
Chapter Four – Prudence
