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After having a light dinner, I closed myself in Xander’s room to look at Angel’s photos. All of them were on display on the bed in front of me but instead of examining them for a clue, I was talking to my sister in my head. I missed her so much—the emotional turmoil was making it hard for me to focus. I rested my head on my arm, closed my eyes and hoped to empty my thoughts.
When I opened my eyes again, Xander’s face was so close to me.
“What?” I murmured, blinking my eye repeatedly, I was trying to understand the moment.
“Shh…Get back to sleep. I’m just tucking you in,” he whispered and covered me with the comforter.
“Come here,” I murmured and reached for his hand.
“What?” he whispered.
“Lie down next to me.”
“I need to work,” he whispered.
“You work a lot. Come here.” My sleep-filled voice sounded like begging.
“Come on,” I said while he was standing there and staring at me.
I smiled when he started to take his clothes off.
“Bossy little thing,” he murmured and placed a kiss to my forehead as pulling me closer to his body. I put my head into the crook of his neck and sighed when sleep called to me again.
?
I woke up alone in the morning with a depressed feeling inside me. Getting out of the bed I walked to the balcony but the sky was grey and cloudy—like it was suffocating me.
I was down, nervous and impatient. I wanted to find something that would bring my sister to me. When I turned back to the room I saw Angel’s photos on the nightstand. Loss, anxiety, sadness, longing were forming a lump in my throat—making my vision blur with unshed tears. The silence in the room wasn’t bearable; I opened Spotify on my phone. Jazz music filled the air as I sat cross-legged on the bed and spread the photos around me.
The photos were strange: no posing, no smile... She must have sent me a message with them but why she would send me a message with photos. She could have easily written it down and left it at home.
Maybe she wasn’t sure if something would happen to her. Maybe she was just afraid of the possibility. Maybe she was so nervous to think clearly.
Maybe, maybe, maybe…
I made up lots of excuses to give some meaning to these photos. I examined them closely… to find somewhere to start.
Minutes passed by and I had nothing to work with.
The moment I was about to leave the room in frustration, Alex came in.
“Oh, you’re awake,” he said with his usual playful tone. But his smile dropped when he saw my face.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked as he pushed my hair back.
“Nothing, specifically.”
“What’s going on in your pretty head, Dawn?” he asked, softly caressed my cheek.
“I cannot figure out what she was trying to say. I don’t even know if she was trying to tell me anything at all with these photos. Or if she made you take her photos just because I teased her so much about her lack of photos.”
I was angry at myself that I couldn’t find anything. I couldn’t think the way my sister did, couldn’t get inside her mind to know what she was trying to say.
“Shh…your brain will explode because of too much thinking. Let’s eat something first and then if you want to distract your mind, you could do some modeling for me, hmm? You can do something else, too of course.”
He was so hesitant about asking me to do modeling.
“You can just lie down and get rest…maybe you can swim. You know, you don’t have to do anything,” he added nervously.
