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I bite my tongue and moan with the taste of blood, wondering if hers tastes the same. Opening my eyes I focus on the drop of blood that runs from her neck to her breasts. My mouth waters with the vision of it and I bite my tongue once again until another fresh taste of copper fills my senses.
“Fuck, look at him. He’s in Nirvana,” Theo laughs crudely and wraps his lips around one of the wounds he opened on her shoulder as he gets inside her so roughly she falls on my cock. The breath is knocked from my lungs with the impact.
“Shit! Your head buried in his crotch… this is hotter than any porn,” Theo comments and slaps her ass, making her move forward toward my cock once again.
“Let me suck him,” she says to my mortification.
“Suck him, slut! Take him down your throat,” he urges her. His hands are wrapped around her waist and he keeps thrusting into her roughly. But I cannot focus on anything else when her lips wrapped around my head. This is Nirvana.
I hear her scream –maybe he opened another wound on her, but I care about nothing at that second. All I care about is the hot and wet suction around my cock that makes my balls tighten, my abs clench, and makes all the tension in my body focus where her lips are.
Finally, with the flick of her tongue I come. I experience the most intense pleasure I’ve ever felt.
And this time, I don’t even feel disgust.
At the age of fifteen I’ve been broken beyond repair already.
February 2, 2014–Day 17
I was watching the ceiling since the moment I opened my eyes. I didn’t have any strength to move even though I hadn’t been tied for four days. Since I let him, no scratch that, since I begged him to fuck me I was upgraded to stay in this room without being bound to the bed. But this didn’t change anything because of my exhaustion.
I saw the door open from the corner of my eye, but didn’t even turn my head. I knew what was about to come. Since he fucked me with my permission my routine was my daily shot of drug, morning fuck, and breakfast… sometimes not in that order.
And then I was lying in bed until the second shot of the drug. As I lay down on the bed I didn’t feel anything but sweet dullness. I was feeling empty, but a hunger I had never felt before started to show itself. It made its way to the surface slowly but surely, bringing the madness with it, forcing the sweet numbness away. I didn’t care about breakfast or being treated like a sex toy again –I wanted him to fuck me in the first place, anyway.
The first a few days of my captivity I was screaming, crying… I was a mess because of the situation I was in, and mostly because of the guilt I felt for the state I was. After those first days, my hope for escape died slowly but surely. I just wanted to keep being alive. The urge to cry or scream wasn’t there anymore and instead all I felt was the scorching lust, consuming sexual tension because of the porn I kept hearing. Then, the drug started to affect me more and more. It erased everything but the exhaustion behind that faked numbness. All those emotions left a gut feeling that something wasn’t right, but the protesting in my mind was too weak and my body was too tired to notice it. For four days, my mind was silent except for the cries of another shot of numbness.
All I cared about was the drug… I wanted it in my veins. I needed it.
“Good morning, Cupcake,” Mike asked, smiling sweetly. He put the tray on the chair next to the bed.
I sat up, scratching the skin where Mike injected the drug every time. Even my skin wanted it; the itchy feeling was getting stronger each day.
“Did you bring it?”
My voice was tired and every muscle in my body was aching, the only cure for me was the syringe in his hand.
“You started to like it more than you should, don’t you, Angel?”
“Give it to me!” My voice sounded like a growl, but I was desperate.
I noticed Mike didn’t make any move to inject me. He only looked me down and laughed.
“Mike… give it to me,” I said again, trying to sound seductive.
“No,” he shrugged and went to the dresser.
“What?”
I was trying to understand what he meant. I felt dizzy with the mere possibility of not having my shot. He came back next to me with a new t-shirt in his hand and said, “Don’t worry, Angel. I’ll take care of you, but no drug for you today.”
“Mike, please…” I begged as he lifted me to his arms and placed me on the dresser like a baby.
“Shh, I love it when you scream my name, not when you’re numb,” he said, sucking my bottom lip into his.
“But I love how it makes me crazy for you, how it makes everything brighter, more intense,” I said, licking his lip, moving my hands down his sides until I reached his ass.
“I said no,” he told me sternly, but didn’t push me away from his lips.
