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I swallowed. I didn’t know how to react. His words were like a band-aid on my scars, but they were also hard to process. A part of me wanted to forgive him, but another part wasn’t sure if this was just his way of “fixing” me. I could sense the expectation in the air between us, but I didn’t react. I couldn’t. It felt like a risk, a gamble I wasn’t ready to take.
So, I shut my sketchbook closed and went to my room.
CHAPTER 23
ZEKE
I stayed in my place as I watched her leave. I knew she was listening to me, she must’ve been, but she didn’t give any reaction to prove me right or ask any questions.
She’d definitely changed. A lot.
When I saw her in that bathroom, I thought the life must’ve weakened her, must’ve broken her. But I was wrong, and I was so glad to be wrong.
Maybe she was broken, who wasn’t, but she didn’t need someone else to glue her together. She held the pieces of herself together and dealt with everything by herself. She was much stronger than the time I left her.
She wasn’t the girl who freely showed affection and love anymore. She was reserved, mysterious, behind her own walls. She didn’t try to please anyone. She wasn’t taking any shit from anyone. She wasn’t a little girl with a bright smile anymore, she was a woman who decided who was worthy of her time.
And I desperately wanted to be worthy for her.
This new Maya didn’t need me, didn’t need my affection like she used to, and this only made me need her more.
Before I left her, she was a little girl who wore her heart on her sleeve, a girl who would’ve done anything to make me happy. That was the reason I left her. Because I knew what I wanted, and I knew she would’ve given it to me in a heartbeat, even if it would’ve hurt her, whether it was the right thing or not.
But now, she would’ve never done anything to please me. If she did something, it would only be because she wanted it. She was strong to control her own fate, I didn’t need to decide for both of us anymore, and I wanted to put my destiny in her hands, too. I wanted her to decide if she’d burn me or bu
rn with me.
I inhaled deeply. For the first time, the air I sucked in didn’t hurt me, instead, it was pregnant with hope.
Standing on my feet, I walked toward her room and waited in front of her door. I smiled when I heard the noises from the television. I bought it for her today, and I was ecstatic she didn’t refuse to use it.
I slowly opened her door. She tensed with my presence in the room but didn’t acknowledge me. There was a sitcom I passed a few times on TV but had never watched. Walking toward her, I sat on the floor next to her bed. I knew she was watching me from the corner of her eye.
I pretended to watch the TV, and as the time passed, she relaxed into the bed. That was when I let myself watch her.
She was sitting on the bed with her knees tucked under her. The duvet swallowed her small form. She hugged a pillow to her chest, resting her chin on it.
I wanted to reach and tuck the strand of hair behind her ear, but instead, I kept watching her.
I stopped breathing when a smile slowly appeared on her face. A bright glimpse found its way in her eyes for a moment.
That was the moment the old and new Maya lived in the same body peacefully.
That was when I fell in love with her all over again.
I stood up and sat on the bed, facing her. She ignored me for a few seconds before finally looking at me with a sigh.
“I was wrong when I thought that leaving you was the right thing to do,” I said, leaning toward her.
I was expecting her to pull away, but she didn't. She let me place a kiss on her head. “Good night, Maya. Sleep peacefully. I'm here,” I said softly.
I was moving to sit in my usual spot on the floor as she tried to sleep, but her soft touch on my wrist was enough of an invitation, I wouldn't dare to wish yet alone refuse.
It was almost like old days. I was waiting for her to fall asleep again. Though this time, none of us slept.
CHAPTER 24
MAYA
