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My eyes still closed, I turned in his arms.
“Are you still sleeping?” he asked teasingly.
I nodded. “I need a dream. I just need to see a dream,” I choked on my emotions.
He cradled my face in his palms, but I didn’t dare to open my eyes.
“Maya, look at me.”
I shook my head.
“Look at me, baby girl,” he whispered, grazing his lips on mine, making me gasp with surprise.
I opened my eyes. He was smiling, and his eyes were full of love and hunger.
“Will you,” I started to ask the question I was afraid of the answer to, but instead I changed the question, “Why did you send me your number every month?”
He smiled sadly. “Because I hoped you’d call me.”
“Why didn’t you write a note? Just a number? Why?”
“I didn’t want you to feel obliged to call me. And I thought you didn’t want to talk to me. So, I just sent my number with the money.”
I frowned. “Money?”
“Yeah. I had to make sure you have enough money to live your life. I should’ve cut all the contact with you. Maybe a better man would’ve done that, but I couldn’t do it. I wouldn’t live in money while you were in that shit hole.”
I swallowed. “I didn’t get any money from you,” I murmured.
“What?” he breathed out. His face was a picture of confusion.
I snorted a moment later, causing him to look at me with questions in his gaze.
“Now it all makes sense. My mother’s drug stash always renewed every month on the same day. Until now, I thought it was a sick coincidence, but now I see. She was probably taking the money you left to buy drugs. You know she finds money wherever it is,” I said.
“Fuck,” he growled, turning onto his back. I shuddered with the distance he created between us, and I knew I shouldn’t delay the dreadful question any longer.
“Will you leave me again? Or make me leave?” I blurted out.
He looked at me with a frown, like he wasn’t expecting this question at all. Biting my lip, I waited for his answer as he studied my face. Something in his eyes softened, and he turned to his side and pulled me back to his chest again.
“No,” he finally said with certainty.
I waited for him to add more, but he didn’t. He turned to lay on his back again. Holding my thigh, he pulled me on top of him. Just like that first time we crossed the line. Our eyes were closed then, but now he was looking at me like I was the most interesting, most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.
Scared that he's changed his mind, I closed my eyes.
“Open your eyes, Maya,” he chuckled. “No more dreams,” he said when I looked at him. Gripping my hips, he moved me back and forth on his erection, all the while looking deep into my eyes. “My dreams came true with you. No more dreaming,” he added.
I opened my mouth and closed again when no words came out.
He sat up, bringing our bodies closer. “Tell me what you want. Whatever you want.”
I frowned. “I don’t understand.”
“I failed, baby. I failed at fighting against my love for you. I failed at trying not to want you. I failed fighting against you. Now, I’ll fight with you, if you still want me to.”
“You… me…” I had a hard time to express what I felt.
