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6
Dane
The girls perchin a row on my sofa. With three fries in one hand and a quarter of her burger in the other, even little Ophelia does her best to mimic the adults. I stand off near the kitchen in a struggle not to hover. My ability to steer small talk away from the questions raging around my skull is next to none. This is my attempt to give Caiti breathing room. At least until the others leave.
I finish my burger and fries in record time, silencing the hours-long gurgle in my stomach as the girls chitchat away. I can’t deny that something warms inside me seeing Caiti and Evie bonding again after so long apart. When I called Evie earlier to inform her of the situation, she was as surprised as I was to hear that Caiti was back in town and shared with no small amount of attitude that she hadn’t spoken to Caiti in three years.
I busy my idle hands with loading up last night's dishes into the dishwasher, only half listening. The girls decide to put on a movie to keep Ophelia occupied. The show gives me an excuse to dip out and make some much-needed phone calls. With two new guests about to take up much of my time and space, my normally quiet routine will experience a shift, and I need to see to that shift before it becomes a problem.
I shrug into my black jacket hanging by the door and slip out of the apartment, seemingly unnoticed. Nobody summons me back, not that I expect them to. With my phone in hand, I jog down the steps to my apartment and out into the chilly air. The sun has gone down, the first stars of the night peeking out of the charcoal sky. With a hand in my pocket for warmth, I dial the number to connect with one of the nurses taking care of my mom.
“Thank you for calling The Legendary. This is nurse Erika.”
“Hey, Erika. It’s Dane again. How is she tonight?”
The sigh leaving Erika’s lips is telling. “She’s okay. You know her confusion worsens when you don’t come to visit.”
I clench the fist in my pocket. “How bad was it?”
“She was fine, Dane.”
“How bad?” I question again. She knows as well as I do that I won’t stop until I get an answer.
“She waited by the door. She told everyone who walked in that she was waiting for her son. We were able to get her to relax by telling her we were going to curl her hair for your arrival, hoping she would forget when you didn’t show, but as soon as we were done, she just kept asking where you were.”
My head falls heavily between my shoulder blades, and my face tips up to the sky. A guilty sigh fractures the quiet air.
“Dane,” Erika starts.
“No,” I say, low. “It’s okay. Thanks for letting me know, and I promise I’ll be there tomorrow.”
“It’s okay, you know, to do what’s best for you. We’ve got her here. We’ve got her.”
I don’t bother responding to her attempted reassurance. Her words do nothing to soothe the yoke of responsibility sitting on my shoulders. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Without waiting for a goodbye, I hang up.
The weight of my duties adds to the gravity keeping me tethered until each step feels like trying to pass through quicksand. I don’t want to return upstairs until I can sort some of this shit out. I don’t want to be liable right now for softening the words coming from my mouth. Not until I’ve had some time to fortify myself.
My screen brightens when I tap the phone again and punch out a text to Evie.
Let me know when you’re leaving, and I’ll come back.
Not that Ihave anything to do to occupy my time until then. My work is done for the night, and I trust Duke to close the place up. I’d call over a friend, except I’d rather not divulge much without having details myself. Even the short chat with Rhett this afternoon set me on edge and heightened my need for answers I’m yet to receive.
Without much thought to the decision, I walk into the back patio of my bar and find an empty seat along the perimeter. The place isn’t too busy tonight, and the cool air means only a few straggling smokers remain outside. A part of me wishes I had a few drinks to ward off the chill, but I know cool, sober heads are necessary.
I have a little girl.
Leaning back in the iron patio chair, I let that phrase sink deep into my brain. I have a daughter. A husky chuckle sneaks out with no small amount of disbelief. This was never supposed to happen. I even went so far as to ensure with surgery and limited one-night stands. Caiti was an exception to a carefully constructed rule. I have a couple of women in town, who I’ve known for years and trust implicitly to take their birth control, that I’ve let into my bed on occasion. And the one time I make an exception…
Fuck.
The problem is, it’s already happened. The deed is done. Caiti doesn’t know what my family, and these genes, are capable of, and now it’s too late. That little girl is tainted with my blood, which makes it my responsibility to raise her through whatever comes her way because of me.
Her cherub face pops into my mind. Her dark curly hair and round eyes. The innocence only a baby can carry for a few years until the reality of the world chases it away.
Thoughts of my own childhood taint her image, and I brush them all aside.
I’ll be damned if I let them walk away now.
Caiti’s reasons for showing up in town after three years remain a mystery, and I don’t care. She might feel she made a mistake coming here, but I hope I can show her another side of regret. Because there’s no way I’m about to let them go. They don’t know it yet, but they need me to care for them. I refuse to let them down.
I can handle it just as I’ve handled everything else life has dished my way.
“Hey, we’re ready to head out.” Evie’s voice beside me yanks me from the abhorrent walk down memory lane.
“Shi-oot. You scared me.” Seeing the tired toddler in her arms triggers me to censor myself.
“Sorry. I was about to text, but then I spotted you.”
I crane my neck to view beyond her shoulder. “Where’s Caiti?”
Evie looks down at the little girl resting her head on her shoulder. “She said she was coming.”
“She’s probably poisoning my milk.”
“Maybe,” Evie sing-songs.
“You know, between you and your boyfriend, this isn’t that amusing.”
“Fiancé. And I think it’s pretty dang fitting.”
The legs of my chair scrape against the concrete patio as I stand. “How so?”
She adjusts the little girl on her hip. I can’t help my drifting gaze roaming Ophelia’s face. It’s as if my brain is trying to find all the similarities in order to claim them as mine.
“You ran my sister out of town, and I haven’t seen her for three years. Karma is dishing it out, and I am here for it.”
“I didn’t run her out of town. She chose to leave.”
“Yeah, well…” Evie trails off and shrugs. “You have a month this time to get it right.”
My head rears back in affront. “Get what right?”
