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Questions Brian had asked her—now his visit made sense. Questions Avery would be able to answer, if she’d been the sister she should have been.
Avery didn’t regret warning her sister about Brian. She had never trusted him, not one smidgen. She’d watched him exert a great deal of suavity to try to win her approval of his relationship with Addisyn—and become sullen and angry when that failed. The man Addisyn had loved was as imaginary as a department-store mannequin. The real Brian Felding was cruel, greedy, and hateful. Avery would have been downright negligent not to warn her sister—like watching her step in front of a moving car without saying a word.
But what would have happened if she had refused to let Addisyn’s drifting become the focal point of their relationship? If she had continued to show her how much she loved her? What if she had expressed her concerns, doused her words to Addisyn in love, and not allowed her terror and hurt to tangle her meaning—and then showed her sister that she trusted her enough to give her room to make her own choices? She had to admit that things might be radically different if she had. It might have saved her relationship with Addisyn.
It might have saved Addisyn herself.
El Shaddai, be with my sister. Help her find her way.It had been Avery’s constant prayer since that day at The Loch. But praying didn’t seem like quite enough, somehow—especially since she now knew the full truth about how disastrous Addisyn’s life was. She wanted to be boots-on-the-ground, doing something.
“Avery?” Laz was peering around the corner. “You okay?”
She’d been supposedly hanging up her coat for ten minutes. “Yes!” Avery snapped out of her reverie and tried to look alert. She followed Laz into the front part of the store.Focus, Avery. You’re at work.Spiritual warfare would have to wait until after hours. “Is there a shipment coming in today of anything?”
Laz squinted and scratched his beard thoughtfully. “Don’t reckon so, unless I overlooked something in the books.”
“Which is highly possible.” The “books” were literal spiral-bound notebooks, crabbed and crowded with Laz’s unruly and—in Avery’s opinion—entirely illegible handwriting. His insistence on using this unreliable method of tracking business had always driven her crazy. She had tried to persuade him to embrace technology, but he’d clung to the old ways with his usual stubbornness.
Laz just shrugged. It wasn’t a war he wanted to fight again, apparently. “We do have some boxes of magazines to unpack, if you want to do that.”
Five minutes later Avery had located the cartons in the equally unruly storeroom and had carried them out to the magazine rack—with Laz’s help. He couldn’t stand to see her, or any other woman, carrying something heavy. She sliced the top open with a boxcutter and examined the contents. Laz sold issues ofNational Geographic Traveler,Outside,Backpacker,Trek & Mountain,Field and Stream, andGuns & Ammo, among others. Avery liked to take home an issue ofOutdoor Lifeherself every now and then.
Good thing they had come over the weekend. The white wire rack was almost empty, probably because Laz’s store was as much a destination to glean outdoor tips and tricks and the latest trail info as it was a place to shop.
Mindlessly she began cramming the slick magazines onto the rack. The front of aNational Geographic Travelercaught her eye—a giant color photograph of New York City.
“Life in the Capital of the World,” the white block font read. Avery stared at the words. She didn’t need to read the featured story to know about life in the city. She had lived it. And so had Addisyn.
Recklessly she thrust another stack of magazines onto the rack. Maybe growing up in NYC had contributed to Addisyn’s problems, given her temptations that Avery hadn’t prepared her to resist. Maybe the glitz and glamor had been too much of a pull. Addisyn had always been less grounded, more impressionable than Avery—especially in her teens. Maybe Avery should have never taken her to such a crazy place.
But the alternative was staying with their father, which was no choice at all. Avery shuddered at the mere thought. She couldn’t let that man get his hands on Addisyn. She’d had to leave, and an enormous, frenetic city like New York was much more protective than a small country town, where they could have been easily found.
In New York, work was plentiful and food was cheap and questions weren’t asked. Even two young girls living alone attracted no more attention than the humble pigeons that fluttered on the street corners.
For a moment, Avery wondered if Addisyn might possibly have gone back to the city. The idea sank deeply into her mind for a few minutes, but then her shoulders slumped in defeat. Of course Ads wouldn’t be in the Big Apple. Brian’s visit told her that much. Surely he’d combed the city before trying anywhere else—and he must have been truly desperate to seek out Avery, knowing exactly how she felt about him.
The thought made Avery even more discouraged. What if she never saw Addisyn again? The idea was like a knife in her soul, but she had to consider the possibility. If Brian, with all his money and connections and persistence—or obsession—couldn’t find Addisyn, who could?
Oh, if only she could just know Addisyn was okay!Just one word or sign would be enough. And then—if she never wants to see me again—I’ll accept that. But I need to know she’s all right. Need to tell her how sorry I—
“Miz Avery?”
Avery started in surprise. The stack of magazines she’d been holding cascaded in a sleek wave to the floor, crumpling the covers and creasing the pages. “Oh, Laz!” The incident was the tipping point of a landslide in her soul, and all her pain avalanched onto her heart. Avery felt her eyes begin stinging. “I’m so sorry.”
“Now don’t you worry.” Laz spoke in the same soothing tone he used for injured animals. “Seems to me, though, that you’re mighty skittish today. Somethin’ troublin’ you?”
“No, I’m—uh—” Lying was foreign to Avery. About as foreign as hiding her emotions. “It’s nothing.”
“Hm.” Laz cut a glance at her that clearly showed he wasn’t buying her fib. “I see. And is there any particular reason why you saw fit to put them there magazines on the rack with their tails in the air?”
Avery spun around to see with horror that her fifteen minutes’ work putting the magazines on the rack had resulted in a neatly arranged display—with all the magazines upside down! Her hands flew to her cheeks. “Oh! I can’t believe I did that.” Heat crept up her neck. “I was just—just thinking. I’ll fix them.” She reached toward the display.
“Hold on a minute.” Laz’s calm yet authoritative voice stopped Avery in her tracks. “Let’s talk for a minute about whatever is rippin’ yer mind to pieces.”
“I said. It’s nothing.” Avery held her arms rigidly at her sides.
In the course of her life, she’d learned to trust no one—not her father, not her mother, not Brian. And not even her own sister, in the end. As much as she liked Laz, she wasn’t opening up to him about personal details.
“This nothin’ got somethin’ to do with that city slicker fella that got you all worked up that day?”
