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One kiss did not create an engagement where I was from, but in New York, things were way more traditional. The Lupu family certainly had no hold on me, although who knew how far those conniving bastards might go to destabilize me and my clan. I supposed I should consider myself lucky because if I had kissed anyone but Tatum, it could be used to blackmail me or my clan. By the way he’d reacted, there was no fear of another kiss. God, he’d behaved as if he’d kissed a troll. Now, I may not be the sexiest girl in a room, but I knew I was no troll. Rage-filled adrenaline surged into my bloodstream, and I seethed with fury.
Either way, I couldn’t risk any kind of scandal. I couldn’t let word of our kiss get back to LA.
I gripped Gabriela’s hand. “Please, please, for the sake of the sisterhood, do not tell anyone. I was stressed out and let my mouth run away from me, but if it got out, it would ruin me.”
“I would never! I know everything about sisters,” she whispered harshly. “Your secret is safe with me, but you cannot tell another soul. I can’t guarantee that anyone else will have your back. Like I said, the women here are vipers. You can’t trust anyone. You’re lucky I’m the one who found you.”
She pulled out her eyeliner and mascara, wielding them like weapons. “Now come on, let’s get you fixed up. If you go out there like that, they’ll know something’s up. After I’m done, you’ll look so good, he’ll be eating his heart out.”
I seriously doubted that. Tatum made it painfully clear what he thought of me and my so-called assets. But I was grateful for Gabriela’s help.
“Sit still,” she warned as she swiped mascara on my lashes. I stared at the fierceness on her otherwise sweet, innocent face. The strain around her eyes and the corners of her mouth were real.
“Why would you help me?” I couldn’t help asking. “I’m not even a Lupu.”
“Please. The women may be horrible bitches, but men are the absolute worst. Granted, I didn’t expect this from Tatum. He’s always had a good reputation, but that only goes to prove my point. Even the best of them can’t help themselves. They’re animals. Beasts. Lupu or not, you’re a mafie woman, and there’s no way I’m throwing you under the bus over one ill-advised kiss, clan allegiance aside.”
I wasn’t sure how I felt about what she’d said. As a sef, I’d consider her statement a travesty. Nothing was above clan and family, but these were Lupu men we were talking about. Considering how untrustworthy Tatum had proven himself to be, and he was considered the cream of the crop, I could only imagine what the others were like. I certainly couldn’t blame Gabriela. The level of ferocity in such a young girl didn’t come from nowhere. I might not know the details, but this girl had certainly witnessed some ugly stuff.
Checking over her shoulder instinctively, she turned back to me and suggested, “I’ll tell you a secret about my family. That way, you’ll have something on me, and we’ll be even.”
I gave a little shrug. She tutted me for moving as she swiped on an extra bit of eyeliner on the outside of my lids.
“My sister is married to one of these monsters. You know, with arranged marriages as they are, she was paired off with a guy who was considered a catch. My father was the former consilier, but he’d been killed during the same hit that took out our old sef. Without my father around to protect my sister, her husband tortured her.” She leaned in close and confided in a harsh whisper. “But we’re about to get our revenge.”
My eyebrows raised up to my hairline. Fuck, this was some serious shit.
“There. Now you know,” she said with a satisfied look.
“Don’t do something irrational or stupid, but if you need my help, just ask,” I offered. I didn’t know where that came from or what kind of hot water it might get me into, but this girl was courageous, and I couldn’t let that go unrewarded.
She shook her head. “I couldn’t possibly get you involved. Anyway, the fewer people who know about it, the better. We’re going to disappear and never be found again.”
“What?” I gasped.
I stared down at this tiny, young girl with new respect. Escape from a mafie clan? Especially one as well-connected as the Lupu? That was a near impossibility.
She stepped back and tilted her head to the side, examining her work. Pulling out a bright red lipstick, she smeared it thickly on my lips.
“Shh. No more talk,” she chastised me severely. Her eyes shifted left and then right. “There are ears everywhere. Just consider yourself lucky for having escaped with one measly, unwanted kiss.”
I sighed inwardly. If only it had been measly. If only that wretched kiss had been unwanted. What I would do for that to be true… But I wasn’t about to humiliate myself further by divulging my feelings on the first kiss I’d ever had with a man. My lips still stung from the force of his mouth on mine. The feel of the crisp, smooth cotton of his shirt, and the hot, chiseled flesh of his muscles underneath as I touched his chest. Dear God, I was getting hot thinking about it, and I hated the guy. I bit down my groan of despair.
Gabriela turned me toward the mirror so I could inspect her work.
Hmm, I looked even better than before. The red shade of the matte lipstick made my full lips stand out more than usual. I fluttered my eyelashes, the thick black outline of liner and mascara making the blue of my eyes pop.
I looked good.
I pulled my shoulders back. My ego survived an epic battering, but I could do this. No man, and certainly not Tatum the Stupid, was going to get the best of me.
“Go out there and show him what he’s missing. Stay close to him, but flirt outrageously with every man in his vicinity. I don’t care what he says…he’s going to regret whatever he did to you,” she forecasted.
“I will,” I swore bleakly, but I knew the truth.
Tatum wasn’t interested in me. I’d salvage my ego, but he’d have to care to get jealous, and he didn’t care for me in the least. The truth stung so badly that my nostrils burned, but I swore if I let one rogue tear escape, I would scratch my eyes out for my purebred stupidity.
Snapping my spine straight, I stifled the tears, stuffed down my feelings, and wrapped my strength around me like a mantle, like an Amazon’s armor.
He doesn’t want me. He hates me.
It was a brutal reminder, but it was real. I’d already let myself slip into fantasy once before and look what had happened.
I glared at myself in the mirror and swore to myself, never again.
