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He recoiled as if I’d slapped him. “You mean you never meant to get caught. In what world would betraying me not hurt me, Cat?”
“I wouldn’t have given them anything that could be used against you or your family. Only something to help them. The Lupu clan is so rich. They can afford it.”
He barked out a bitter laugh. “They can afford it, you say? The Lupu family, you mean. That’s supposed to be you. As my fucking wife, you’re supposed to be a Lupu. But you don’t see yourself as one. You could’ve come to me and told me. I would’ve helped you. Nicu was right. I should’ve known better, you being a Popescu.”
I flinched at his accusation. He was right. I saw it in his eyes. He would’ve helped me. But I didn’t know that until now. I was so used to looking after myself that I automatically went into self-reliant mode. If it was me alone, if my brother’s life wasn’t on the line, I would’ve risked it. But I’d been too afraid to come to him.
I rose to my knees, my hands coming together in supplication as I argued the only thing I had on my side, “My brother’s in serious trouble, but I wouldn’t have hurt you, Luca—”
His palm came up. “Don’t. Stop trying to defend yourself. You know better than anyone how important trust is in a family. It’s the difference between life and death. Do you know, this whole time, Nicu hated you because he believed you were a spy? That your father insisted on a marriage to plant you in the bosom of our family? I believed it as well, until I met you. Then I thought, there’s no way. I thought that boarding school must have saved you from the worst of the Popescu tribe poison, but you’ve proved me wrong. Do you even care for me?”
“Of cour—”
His hand slashed through the air. “Don’t answer that. I can’t stand hearing another lie come out of that pretty, treacherous mouth of yours. Of course, you don’t.”
I flew to my feet. “But I do! I do, Luca. God, I do.”
“Stop,” he thundered, his voice thundering through the air, bouncing off the walls and ringing in my ears. My nostrils burned. My eyes stung with pain, tears spilling out in a fast and steady stream.
My head and shoulders dropped. Swallowing over the lump in my constricted throat, I mumbled, “I’m sorry. I would have made sure not to hurt you. You have to believe me.”
“Too late for sorry,” he clipped out. “I don’t believe a damn thing you say to me.”
“Don’t,” I whimpered, my bottom lip trembling.
“I want you out.” He pointed a trembling finger to the open doorway. “I want you fucking out of my house. Out of my life.”
The tremor that had started in my hands radiated up my arms and my shoulders began shaking.
He jabbed his forefinger again. “Go. Get the hell out, Cat. Go!” he thundered.
I jerked as if smacked across the face. It was what I deserved. Fuck, fuck, fuck. He was right. I had betrayed him. The pain of losing him seared through me, and I tried again, “Luca, can I explain—”
“No,” he declared hoarsely. “I need you to leave before I say something regrettable. I need you gone. Now.”
My chest heaved with agony. I’d lost him. Stupid me, I thought I’d get away with it, that I could have my cake and eat it, too. Instead, I’d thrown away the best thing in my life.
Reeling, I staggered past him like a drunkard. Grabbing my purse, I shoved my feet into my shoes, threw the door open, and fled. My skin was clammy and cold, doused by waves of shame and hopelessness. The way my heart was palpitating, I knew I couldn’t stay on this floor and wait. Stabbing the elevator button, I snapped my head from side to side, searching for a fast escape route. There was a door at the end of the corridor. I lurched toward it and yanked on the doorknob. Thank God, thank God, it flew open.
Propelling myself forward, I caught the banister in time before flying headfirst down a flight of stairs. Stumbling down a couple of steps, I righted myself and took the rest of the stairs two by two as fast as I could without cracking my head open. Tormented by what I’d done, the idea crossed my mind to fling myself down the stairs and take my chances on anyone finding my splattered brains this far up a building of seventy-seven floors.
My blubbering cries and gasps for breath ricocheted off the walls of the narrow stairway, making me feel stupid, but I couldn’t help myself. I’d ruined everything. In the end, I did the one thing I’d tried to avoid—hurting Luca. Somewhere around the fiftieth floor, I paused to pull out my cell phone. Raising my face to the ceiling, I sent out a silent prayer that there were enough bars on my Wi-Fi to make a call. I’d normally text, but it was hard enough finding Cristo’s number through my tears.
Pressing the call button, I continued to make my way down as I waited for him to pick up.
“What?” he answered irritably.
“Cristo?” I croaked out.
His tone changed from annoyed to alarmed in an instant. “What is it, Cat? What’s wrong?”
“He caught me. He threw me out,” I blubbered out, followed by a sharp cry before I shoved my fist into my mouth to stop myself.
“Fuck. Where are you?”
“I’m i-in the stairway, going down the stairs. I can’t stay here. What sh-should I do, Cristo?”
He moved into big brother mode. “Fuck, sweetie. You can’t walk the streets alone.”
