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Chapter 35

Nicolas Princeton, Prince of Guardian

Sakura stayed in her room for most of the next day, working on her old photos while everyone was busy preparing for Mary’s wedding. That night Mr. Mayor, his wife, and Lauren came to join them for dinner, and Sakura excused herself that her ankle still pained her and had her meal in her room. She was sure they were having a good time and wouldn’t miss her.

It was later that she remembered about the photos she’d taken yesterday afternoon in the woods. She reached for her camera and clicked it open to get the memory stick.

“Huh?” She brought the camera up to her eyes and looked closely. “Fudge?” she swore under her breath, realizing the memory stick had disappeared. “That’s twice this month,” she muttered. And she still hadn’t found the one Toby had taken from her yet. When and where could she have dropped this latest one? She sighed and decided she’d search for it tomorrow. She was sure it was probably still somewhere on the pathway leading to the house from the woods.

Once she’d finished with the old photos and put them up for sale on her website, she left Toby sleeping in his basket and went to shower. Fifteen minutes later, in her pajamas, she headed out to the library to find a good book to read. She was pretty sure no one would be about this late at night.

She took her time finding the right book, browsing along the shelves. She supposed she was pretty lucky Princeton Mansion had such a good selection of books. It was almost like the public library in town.

She found a book about the history of St. Joseph Island and thought that was good enough. She limped to the sofa near the hearth and sat down. She reached for the remote and turned on the electric fireplace. She thought she needed that extra bit to make herself feel cozy. Then she turned to the book and opened the pages.

Half an hour later, she was feeling drowsy and decided to lie back. Two seconds later, she was fast asleep. When she woke up again, she felt someone was watching her. She blinked and then smiled. “Daddy James?”

The person came closer. “No. Unfortunately, I’m not.”

“Nicolas?” She sat up and touched her head, feeling drowsy. “What time is it?”

“Three in the morning,” he replied. “I couldn’t sleep.”

“Oh, it looks like I’m the opposite, sleeping anywhere.”

He grinned. “Want some help getting back?”

Sakura shook her head. “You can read this if you want. It’s really good.” She exaggerated the really good part.

“Really?” He raised his brows.

Sakura couldn’t help but smile up at him because he looked so much like James. “Yeah,” she said. “Really, really good. Not exaggerating.”

He laughed. “No. You’re lying. Otherwise you wouldn’t have fallen asleep that easily.”

She stood up and threw the book onto the sofa. “Oh, yes. It’s really good.” She grinned, staring up at his great height. “At putting me to sleep. I’ll place it number three on the list of books that put me to sleep.”

He cocked his head to one side. “What’s number one and two?”

“Shakespeare is number one. I couldn’t understand a damn thing in high school. Every time we read Hamlet for homework, I kept falling asleep. But come to think of it, I had the best sleep ever that week. No offense if you like Shakespeare. Thank God Mary and Katherine were there to help.”

“Whoa, I had no idea.”

“Of course you didn’t,” she said. “You know it’s odd, but I can still remember Hamlet’s speech.”

“Yeah?” Nicolas asked, couldn’t help that he couldn’t stop himself from looking at her. Her eyes were bright and her smile was contagious. He felt his heart warmed. “Recite it for me.”

She blinked. “Are you sure? It might put you to sleep like it did me.”

He chuckled. “Then all the better.”

“Okay,” she said. “Here goes.”

Nicolas nodded.

Sakura cleared her throat and began to recite the passage.

“To be, or not to be…”

Nicolas watched her closely. Her eyes were bright and her cheeks were flushed. She had a faraway look on her face that did something odd in his heart. She looked as though she were thinking of something. She looked hurt, and by instinct, Nicolas wanted to protect her.

Sakura stopped. Nicolas noted that her eyes were brewing with tears. He didn’t dare say a thing. She was in her own world.

“I lied,” she said suddenly. She looked up at him. His heart missed a beat. And Nicolas’s heart never missed a beat. “I love Shakespeare. He’s wonderful. I love his work. There’s so much meaning, like the one I’ve just recited. What is the meaning of living? Why live when there is so much suffering? So much pain? Sometimes it’s unbearable. Perhaps if you die, then it’s probably better. You wouldn’t feel the pain anymore, at least. But then the uncertainty of death itself is very scary and probably worse than living, don’t you think?”

Nicolas couldn’t help himself. He pulled her into his arms and hugged her tight.

“Stop it,” he said softly into her hair. “Life is full of fun and wonderful things. What happened to you when you were younger is beyond repair, but you choose your own path. Yes, you didn’t know who your real mother was. Yes, there were problems with us, but you make yourself happy, Sakura. You choose, and I promise I’ll do my best to make you happy, too.”

Sakura chuckled. “You, Nicolas? You are ever so much like Daddy James.” She glanced down, embarrassed. “Sorry. I’m so used to calling him that. I know you and your brothers don’t like it.”

Nicolas didn’t deny that. “Yes, we hate it.”

Sakura frowned. “He is like a real father to me though.”

“I know,” he said.

“You know, inside me I’m still hoping you and your brothers will still accept me as your sister,” she said softly. Instantly, she thought about Sebastian and Darcy and their kisses. They’d never thought of her as their sister—ever. And they had kissed her—so passionately that her insides cried with pleasure. Yet she knew and felt that those kisses were forbidden, and it pained her that she should so enjoy them.

Nicolas sighed. “No. I don’t think that will ever come to be, Sakura.”

She looked disappointed. “Even you?” she asked, gazing up at him.

Nicolas gritted his teeth. How could he tell her that he and his brothers wanted her all right, but not as their sister—as a woman?

“I see,” she murmured under her breath. “Well, if you do want to read that book, it is good at putting you to sleep.” She looked up and gave him a smile. “Good night, Nicolas.”

She moved to his left and then limped to the door. Nicolas stared unseeingly at the book. A moment later, he turned and marched out the door after her.

Sakura gasped as Nicolas scooped her up in his arms. She didn’t know what to say and stared at him in shock.

“You’re injured,” he said and headed up the stairs.

“You know you don’t have to be nice to me just because you’ve hurt my feelings.” She paused and frowned. “What I mean to say is you didn’t hurt my feelings at all. I’m used to being rejected by you brothers. So you can put me down, and I’ll walk to my room myself.”

“Why don’t you just be quiet?” He suggested. “Or you’ll wake everyone up.”

“You’re being like Daddy James,” she said and noticed that he frowned. Oops! She shouldn’t have said that.

They came up to the second floor and met Sebastian, who was coming out of his room. He stiffened and his whole body went rigid.

Nicolas said, “She was in the library. Stupid girl.” He headed straight to Sebastian and unceremoniously dumped Sakura on his brother. “Take her. I need that book.” Then he headed back down.

Sakura bit her lip and wiggled her body. Sebastian tightened his grip on her.

“You can put me down now. I can walk,” she said coldly.

He answered her

by ignoring her and headed to her room. Once inside, he kicked the door shut and then put her into her bed. She quickly snuggled herself in between the sheets before he did it for her. He stood there, looking down at her from his great height, not saying a word. Suddenly, he moved himself toward her, and Sakura gasped in fright.

She still didn’t relax as he tucked her in and puffed up the pillows for her. As he was doing that, he looked at her while she was staring up at him. Then she remembered something. The images flashed in her mind. That night after she’d drowned in the pool, Sebastian was in her room, wasn’t he? He was comforting her, wasn’t he? And Darcy as well? Yes, she remembered it now.

Sakura shut her eyes tight, trying to make the images go away, but they wouldn’t, and in fact, they came even stronger.

She felt warm breath on her skin and flashed her eyes open. Sebastian’s face was mere inches from hers, his nose nearly touching hers.

“What are you afraid of?” he asked.

“Nothing,” she said, breathless all of a sudden. “Good night.” She turned away, her heart pounding in her chest.

Sebastian moved back and watched her roll over so her back was to him. Reluctantly, he turned on his heel and headed out the door, switching off the light as he did so.

When he came out, he saw Darcy in the corridor watching him, his face a dark mask. “What were you doing in her room?”

“She was stupid enough to go to the library and couldn’t get back to her room herself,” was his reply, and then he went into his own room.

Darcy frowned and went back into his room too, his heart hammering in his chest.

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