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ISLA
At some point, Bodie walked out of the room to make a call to tell the manager of his restaurant he won’t be in tomorrow, and I moved from Lochlan’s bed to let him sleep. The movie ended, and now I’m sitting up in my bed quietly munching on cheddar popcorn, pulling up Hulu on my laptop, all while trying to distract myself from the fact this sexy as fuck man is going to be sleeping in the same room as me and my kid. Plus I'm still shocked at everything they have done for all of us so far. I’ll never understand how these men who barely know them can care so much, when their dad never gave a fuck about them. Even after everything Corin did, I can’t say I fully regret being with him per se, because otherwise I wouldn’t have my kids, but I do wish I could have protected them more, so they wouldn’t have gone through everything they did. I’m startled out of my thoughts when Bodie walks back in with another Dr. Pepper.
“Here Angel, I figured you’d want another one. Do you mind if I watch some TV with you? I’ll stay on my side of the bed,” he says, grinning at me.
“Yeah, I guess I’ll share. Thank you for the drink,” I tell him, scooting over so he can climb in beside me. “What do you want to watch?”
Shrugging, he moves in next to me and lays on his side grinning at me. “I’m not picky, whatever you like is fine. I’ll even watch chick flicks.”
“Hmm, really now?” I smirk at him while going through and pulling up The Notebook. “I guess this is fine then, huh?”
“Yup, that’s perfectly fine with me. I’m getting to lay here next to a beautiful woman, so I could die a happy man.” He smiles softly at me while I’m getting the laptop situated on the tray he brought over.
Laying back, I turn my head to look at him. “Honestly, I think you’re all crazy, because I don’t understand what you all see in me. I’m a single mom with three kids, and until getting my inheritance I had nothing to my name but an old beat up death trap of a car, and a degree I've never used. Not to mention the fact you five are hands down the hottest men I’ve ever laid my eyes on. I can’t even come close to being on the same level as y'all. You’re all successful, gorgeous, and thoughtful.” Ending on a sigh, I look at the laptop so I don’t have to look him in the eyes, embarrassed about the fact I feel like such a failure.
“Isla, Angel look at me.” He puts his hand on the side of my face, turning my head so I’m forced to meet his gaze. “You are stunning, have the most beautiful blue eyes, and your body is a fucking dream. You’re smart, down to earth, and a damn good mother. After everything you’ve been through, you still have fire in you and are the strongest woman we’ve ever met. We were serious about wanting to pursue something with you. Yes, all of us, and no, you don’t have to pick. We decided a long time ago this is something we would want to try, given we found the right woman.”
“But how do you know I’m the right one?” I cut him off. “We hardly know each other, and even my baggage has baggage. I don’t have the option of just thinking about how it affects me. First and foremost I have to consider my kids, and I will not let them get hurt anymore. I’ve failed them way too many times as it is. Don’t get me wrong, I would love nothing more than to be able to find love, real love. However, realistically with five of y'all it’ll never work out. I won’t choose between y'all and become the reason you lose your brothers.”
He looks at me in the eyes for a moment, then does the last thing I expect. He grabs my face, and kisses me like his life depends on it, hand twisting in my hair and holding me to him. I’m not some blushing virgin but I can say I’ve never been kissed like this. He kisses me like he’s drowning and I’m the air he needs to breathe. His full beard rubs gloriously on my cheek.
“As much as I want to lose myself in you, we have to stop. I don’t want little man to wake up.” He brushes his hand over my cheek and gives me a small kiss.
“Bodie, I don’t know how to do this. Any of this,” I whisper. A hint of vulnerability comes out. Because I’d be lying to them and myself if I said I didn’t want this. But at the same time it’s been forever since I dated and I don’t exactly have the best track record.
“Angel, you don’t have to do anything. We don’t have to make any plans; for now we can take it slow, get to know one another. See how things go, okay? I like you, my brothers like you, but we don’t want to make you feel pressured. We want you and the kids to know what it’s like to be loved and cherished.”
I look at him with big eyes. “But that’s what I don’t understand. All of you? How does that even work, other than making me a slut? I don’t see what y'all see in me, much less how you could want a relationship with me, and that doesn’t even include the three kids.”
He smiles sweetly at me. “We would be lucky to have you in any capacity. You’re an amazing person and mother, and we adore the kids so they are a plus, not a burden. You four deserve the world. We may not know y'all very well yet, but we want to get to know you, and give you a chance to learn more about all of us. We have all dated separately and have had a few serious relationships but nothing ever worked out. Five different women with different personalities and it turns into jealousy and drama. We are not willing to lose our friendship for relationships. Years ago we talked about finding one woman that would fit with all of us. We all have pretty demanding jobs at times. During the holidays it gets crazy for all of us, but we can work out our schedules so we’ll never have to worry about our woman or the kids not getting attention or being alone.’’
Kids… “That’s another thing Bodie, I’m not able to have kids any more,” I tell him quietly. “I’ve had multiple pregnancy losses, including an ectopic, which required them to remove one of my fallopian tubes. I probably can’t give y'all any more kids, if it ever gets to that point, and certainly not five more.”
Chuckling, he replies, “Angel, none of us want eight kids. Maybe if it’s possible one more, but we wouldn’t care who the biological dad is. We would all treat him or her like our own. Just like we will with Arden, Lochlan and Vivian if you let us. Just think about it. You don’t have to make any decisions about anything right now, okay? Let’s see how things go, get to know each other. Let us get to know the kids, and regardless of how things go between us, we want to be a part of the kids' lives. Even if it’s as crazy uncles. I promise we will take things slow okay?” He kisses my head and starts to stand up. “On that note, I’m going to get on the pull out bed and let you rest. I know it’s only seven thirty but you’ve both had a long day. Hopefully the little man will get some sleep and we can bust out of here tomorrow.”
I reach for his hand and give it a squeeze. “Thank you, Bodie. Thank you for being here, for staying and spending time with Lochlan, for everything.”
“You don’t have to thank me, baby. Y'all are all worth it. To me and my brothers. Goodnight Isla.”
“Goodnight, Bodie.”
I lay there and toss and turn, unable to sleep with everything Bodie has given me to think about. Every time I manage to doze off, the nurses come in to do a vital check, and I wake up. Finally falling sound asleep around eleven, I’m startled awake by a sudden noise.
“MOMMY!” Lochlan jumps up, freaking out.
Bodie beats me over to Lochlan’s bed, “Shhhh, buddy you’re okay, I’ve got you.” I get to the bed and stand next to him waiting to see if Lochlan is going to want me, but he melts into Bodie. Bodie just snuggles Lochlan and whispers that he’s safe, we are here and how loved he is. Lochlan looks so small next to Bodie. In this moment, I know I can fall in love with these men. Watching Bodie snuggle and calm down my son means the world to me.
“Bodie, can you be my daddy now?” He looks up at the man in question with big puppy dog eyes, sincerity in his young voice.
“Buddy….” he starts to reply, before looking at me for help.
“Lochlan baby, it takes time to get to know someone enough for them to be able to be considered your dad,” I offer gently, not wanting to break his little heart. “How about we start with friends, and see how things go?” I brush his hair out of his face.
“But mommy, I want a daddy that loves me and wants to spend time with me, and holds me when I’m scared or sick like the daddies on TV. Bodie and his brothers have all snuggled me and spent time with me, bubba and sissy today. That’s what daddies do. So that means they are our daddies, right?’’ He looks so scared and confused, and Bodie looks like he’s close to being in tears.
Before I can answer, Bodie picks Lochan up carefully, making sure not to pull the oxygen hose, and sets him in his lap.
“Bud, I would love nothing more than to be your daddy, and I know my brothers feel the same, but I don’t want to rush into trying to make us all a family too fast. You and your siblings may not end up liking us, or your mom could find someone who she loves and wants to marry, then he would be your dad. However, I can promise I will always be in your life, for as long as your mom will let me. That goes for my brothers too.”
