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This is the part where I break down. This is the part where I become the crazy girl and fight the steering wheel. Because I’m not worthy. I never am. Nicholas Swanson, the guy who is supposed to be my boyfriend, the guy who pursuedme, the guy who’s been wasting my time...has brought me to this point. I am so screwed up.
Wiping my face of my tears and snot, not caring how it looks, I pull out of the beach parking lot and drive back to campus. Maybe I just need time away from everyone.
I’m back at my dorm, and as I walk up to my room, I hear Taya and Sarah laughing. My girls. My best friends. I love these girls. I look down at my hands and flinch at the snot. I know my face is ridden with tears. As much as I love them, I’m not sure I can look them in the eyes right now.
Getting over my fear, I breathe a deep breath and open the door. They look in my direction mid-laughter, and I try to force a smile their way before walking to my bed. Sarah knows me all too well, though.
“Leia? Are you okay, love? You look like you’ve been crying.”
I knew one of them was going to notice. I throw my bag on the bed and loosen the hood that I have over my head. I lie back on the bed and just let it out.
“Nicholas Swanson is dead to me. You guys can talk to him all you want, but he’snothingto me anymore,” I bite out. I didn’t mean for it to come out as bitter as it did, but fuck it, it came out as bitter as it did. He’s been cheating on me with the most cliché girl he could find, and I’m over it. They both rush over to me, sitting on my bed.
“Wait, what happened, babe? I thought you guys made up,” Taya says. Well, fucking think again.
“I thought we did too. Until I saw him lock lips with a girl at the beach. The same girl heconstantlyflirts with in front of me at his house parties. Stephanie.” They both gasp and hug me tightly.
“Stephanie?! Oh, I’m so sorry, Leia. How long ago was this?” Taya asks.
“Literally like 10 minutes ago. I tried to get some time for myself at the beach, and then I saw them. Looking like a happy couple.”
The memory makes me emotional again. Sniffling, I can’t help the tears building up again. They hug me again, and I hug them back, wishing I could disappear forever.
