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“I swore to Morla to keep you safe. This is your new home.”
“I want none of this.”
“But you need it. You need a roof over your head,” I said lamely as if it would compensate for the many questions she had about me.
I was expecting her to ask more questions because there was this fire in her eyes that burned when she looked at me. She nodded, paced the length of the room, then settled on the bed. It was indeed an upgrade to the life she was living with Morla. It was a difference she was just coming to terms with.
“You must be a maniac to think you can keep me safe. They killed Morla, and they will kill you too. It is that simple,” she looked at me as if to warn me of the dangers that were looming, but I knew better. I had been raised in adversity myself. I had been to hell, and I was back with plenty of scars to prove it. “You know, taking me in has inadvertently placed a target on your back.”
“Gia…”
“I know what you are about to say. You are about to say that I should put it all behind me, I should move on, and I should live for a brighter future.” She laughed so bitterly that I winced. “That is also a foolish thought. If you are thinking about that…”
“I am not.”
“Good,” she sighed, and it sounded painful. “They want to kill me.”
“I’ll protect you,” I said, breathing in the pain that started to build from deep within. “I’ll fight for you.”
I rushed to her side and sat close but refrained from stretching out to hold her hand. God knew from the very second Morla called me I wanted to hold her to myself, make her remember it all, but I could not. Not yet anyway.
“You don’t even know me,” she whispered. “You don’t know anything about me.”
Oh, I did. And everything she was going through at the moment was all my fault, and a single second did not go by that I was not filled with regret. She pulled back the covers, lay on the bed, then drew the blankets to her shoulders.
“You are a fucking fool if you think you can protect me, Julian from Boy’s Ville. You are a fucking fool.”
And she might be right.
I went back downstairs, and my dinner was already set out on the dining room table. Orson was waiting, and he looked like he had just finished crying. His eyes were beaming questions at me, and his mouth muttered her name.
“You found her…” his lips trembled. “How, when?”
I sat in my chair silent, removed the chopsticks from their wrapper, and dug right into the steaming bowl of ramen.
I chewed thoughtfully, and without realizing it tears formed in my eyes. For five years I thought she was dead. I looked all over for her, and everyone thought I was insane, everyone thought I was crazy because it was not possible for someone to be alive out there for five years and not be found. She does not even remember me, she doesn’t even remember what we used to be, and all of this I have built for her is completely worthless.
I almost choked on my food as I became more emotional. I reached for my glass of water to wash down the food and my emotions with it. Everyone looked up to me and any weakness would tarnish my reputation.
Once I was done, I looked up to Orson who was standing in the doorway, “you’ll never tell her about before. You will never mention this to anyone outside these walls, not even Marisa.”
“But sir, she has to know.”
“Not yet,” I stood. “Not like this. Tell Marisa to cancel all my appointments for the week, I need time alone with Gia.”
“Yes boss,” and with that he left me to the complete stillness of my house.
