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HUDSON
My security firm is crushing the projection goals for this year, and my plan is to double by the end of the year. Word of mouth is the biggest advantage we have in our line of business, and having some high-profile clients helps. This profession isn’t for the faint-hearted. My company pays the agents to put their client’s lives ahead of their own. Not everyone can do that. Military background or not.
After arriving at my apartment building, I park in the garage and take the elevator up to the third floor. Normally, I would take the stairs, but my prosthetic is giving me problems. I moved in about two years ago, and it’s pretty quiet. The Eastside of Dallas can be loud, but from tourism, not crime. I come to my door, unlock it, and walk inside. The first thing I do is take off my tie and jacket. Sometimes, I wish I had a job where I could wear jeans to work, and I might get away with it on Fridays, but the rest of the time I’m meeting with executives and it would look unprofessional.
My mother asks me all the time why I don’t buy a house. It’s not like I’m hurting for money. My bank account has a cushion for sure, but I don’t need it. What the hell am I going to do with a gigantic home? A quiet house doesn’t sound very appealing to me. I’d rather hang out in my small apartment. Less to clean and protect.
My father is the exact opposite who doesn’t want the money to go to my head. I don’t let it inflate my ego and don’t waste it on things I don’t need like others. There are so many things I can save up for, and places I would love to travel, but all in due time. Patience is key.
I still front the cost for the VA benefit once a year that helps raise money for veterans. It’s the least I can do. Coming back from deployment, I didn’t return the same man. There are certain things that you see and do over there that you never want to tell anyone. Some come back with all extremities intact, but their mind is fractured. In my case, I lost a leg and my mind. It took me almost a year of counseling to get back to a decent place. Civilian life was a struggle and my family didn’t understand.
My father was in the military, so he tried to explain to them how things were, but in the end, they just couldn’t relate. All they do is worry about me now, and want me to go back to being that man, but I can’t.
There is a knock on my door, and I check the peephole before answering. Few people know where I live, so having someone show up unannounced isn’t common.
I open the door to usher Justin in.
“What are you doing here?” I ask, watching him go straight to the couch.
“Listen, my brother is looking for a job. I don’t normally recommend friends or family because if they fuck up, it makes me look bad, but he’s ex-marine. I told him I’d give this to you, and you could decide. Don’t hire him as a favor to me. Just pretend he is any other applicant. Won’t hurt my feelings.”
We have known each other since we were teenagers, and his brother has always been a pain in my ass. It only seems fitting that he would come to me looking for employment. He tried to make my life a living hell in high school, but I’m not one to hold grudges.
“He has my number. Why didn’t he just call me himself?” I ask, grabbing two beers out of the fridge.
“You know why. Have you forgotten about senior day? Listen, he might have been a dick back then, but he has gotten better.”
I take the papers from the coffee table and stuff them into my briefcase to review tomorrow. His brother should have come to me himself, and the fact he sent Justin makes me even more leery of hiring him. He needs to be a man. If he can’t face me, then how is he supposed to protect my clients?
“I’ll think about it. Now, what are you doing for dinner? I’m starving and have nothing to cook here.”
Justin shakes his head. “I came straight here from the office. Wanna try the new Italian place down the street? Heard it’s good.”
My mother is Italian and growing up, the restaurants never did the justice to the dishes she would make for us. I have trouble going to these type of restaurants because my mother always says it’s not authentic. However, Justin recommends it, and who am I to ruin it for him?
I follow him out my apartment door, and then press the down button on the elevator. When it dings, and we both step inside the stale cigarette smoke hits my nostrils making me gag. Did someone smoke a whole pack while in this elevator? I cover my nose until we reach the ground floor, and once we step out into the fresh air, I take a deep breath.
“Jesus, I didn’t know how much longer I could smell that crap.”
We walk over to the restaurant, my eyes surveying the streets for anything out of the ordinary. It’s weird, but it’s just what I do. My military ways are sunk into my subconscious. Hell, I never know when I’ll need to step up, and being on the lookout helps me be prepared if the time ever arises.
The sign for the restaurant is just ahead, but the first thing that deters me is there is no line. A brand new restaurant should always be packed. The food can’t be that great if patrons are rushing back to have it. He approaches the host and she seats us immediately. Another bad sign.
“Prepare yourself. I’m not sure this place is as good as you think, or else they wouldn’t have open tables during the dinner rush.”
Things like this are what catch my eye. I’m the person who looks down the street to see if anyone is being suspicious. I have a gun on me at all times, and will respond if an attack ever happened. My instincts are quite exceptional, and I can read people. Some are harder than others.
The server takes our order, and Justin tells me all about his new girlfriend. They have been seeing each other for almost a month, and he hasn’t slept with her yet.
“Are you holding back for a reason? Or, is she asking to take it slow?”
His hand teeters. “Maybe it’s both. I don’t want to go too fast because I like her, but she just got out of a relationship. So, I’m scared she might use me as a rebound.”
This is the part where he gets in his head and ends up ruining the relationship by overthinking everything. Poor guy can’t catch a break. Justin is great, but he’s extremely intelligent. Sometimes that’s not a good thing. His analytical mind never shuts off, and this causes him to overthink situations he doesn’t need to. Like this, for example.
“Just do what feels right. Turn your brain off and just enjoy it.”
I want to find someone, but when do I have the time? Relationships are hard and you have to put in work, and right now, my business is my focus. I’ll get there, but not in the next couple of years. The path for Hudson Securities is being paved and I have to take it while I can. Who knows how much it can grow in the next five years?
Do I want a partner? Yes, but that comes with opening myself to someone, and that’s a challenge. There are so many things about me that block me from considering I’ll ever find someone who could care for me unconditionally. Who wants a man with one leg? Or scars all over his body?
I’m damaged goods…
