AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I don’t say I’m happy too because it will be a while, I think before I can say that but I do say, “Thank you,” and give her another hug before saying goodbye to my father.
He embraces me and when he pulls away, he looks me squarely in the eye and says, “Do right by that girl, Raymond. She’s a hell of a lot more than just a babysitter.”
“You’re right,” I say and mean it. “She’s not and I promise I won’t treat her like one.”
He smiles and says, “Good man,” then follows Mom onto the plane.
CHAPTER SEVEN
Kelly
I don’t have a frame of reference for any of this.
Well, of course, I have a frame of reference for feeling a connection to a man. Of course, I understand that. I just have no frame of reference for finding myself in that situation again. Naturally, I’ve had fantasies but do you want to hear something silly? All of those fantasies aren’t romantic in nature. I think, for the most part, my fantasies are all about getting a father for Carly and Caleb and not getting a husband for myself except for how a husband might make my life easier when it comes to handling Carly and Caleb. From what I understand from reading blogs and books early on after my husband died, that’s pretty common.
I never considered finding a man for selfish reasons.
Maybe selfish isn’t a far way for me to put it. Maybe that’s too harsh. I guess the point is it never crosses my mind before that I have to receive any emotional fulfillment apart from the stress relief of the help. I guess I always fantasize about things from a practical perspective. The fact that I’m developing feelings for Raymond surprises me. The fact that a relationship with him appeals to me for reasons that have nothing to do with the kids really surprises me.
And I’m not just talking about his body.
That’s a damned silly thing for me to think as I get into his car and he pulls away. The sitter has all three kids at my house. The kids think we’re going to handle more things about settling Angel in. The sitter thinks we’re going on a date. The truth is, we’re heading to a hotel room.
We’re heading to a hotel room for sex.
This is the first time I do this. This won’t be the first time I have sex in a hotel room but it will be the first time I check into a hotel room where sex is the objective and not just something that happens while I’m there. I feel Raymond’s hand on my thigh as he drives and I put mine over his. There’s a strange and lovely intimacy with that.
“Happy one month,” he says.
I feel myself blushing. “You mean one month anniversary, don’t you?”
“I can’t bring myself to say that. Anniversary is from Latin.Annusmeans year.Versusmeans returning. So, an anniversary means a returning year. There’s got to be another word.”
I giggle and say, “Wow. First off, pretty impressed with you knowing that. Second, no problem. We can wait for a until a whole year returns to find a hotel room, if you like.”
“Luna!” he says. “Luna. It’s the moon but it’s also a month. Happy one-month lunaversary.”
I laugh and say, “You poor man.”
He chuckles and asks, “Why’s that?”
“Because you’ve just shown me how effective threatening to delay sex can be with you.”
“Pretty brave comment from a girl with my hand on her knee,” he says. Then, he squeezes it and I shriek as ticklish sensations shoot over me.
“Truce!” I scream.
He lets go and say, “I’ll agree to the truce now but I can’t promise there won’t be an act of aggression when we get to the hotel.”
I giggle at that and then blush a little. It still feels a little strange, all this romance. I mean, I have no complaints about it. It’s wonderful actually. It’s just hard to wrap my head around having it again. It’s more than difficult, actually. I don’t quite believe it. In fact, it almost feels like at any moment I’m going to wake up and all of it will fade like a pleasant but essentially unsubstantial dream. I can’t imagine anything that could be scarier.
I wonder for a moment if my feelings for him run too deeply after only a month. I shouldn’t say anything but I do. “Ray, do you think when things are calmed down a little, when the crisis is past, maybe you’ll rethink things?”
“God,” he says, “I rethink things every day already.”
“I mean with us,” I say.
“Why would I do that?”
