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“It better not be,” Jazz said, “because I have plans tonight. First, I’m going to dance with Gibby—Seth, you’ll be with Nick. Then we’re going to switch partners and dance with each other. I want atleasttwo dances with the both of you. Gibby, you get more because you’re my girlfriend and I want to get freaky.”
“Your mom and dad are here,” Nick reminded her.
Jazz scoffed. “That’s not my problem. If they didn’t want to see it, then they shouldn’t have come here.”
“But”—Nick sputtered—“but—yourvirtue.”
“Took care of that a long time ago,” Gibby said, leaning back in her chair and grinning smugly. “Broke it into pieces without a twinge of regret.”
“Speaking of regret,” Nick mumbled. “I’m having a few of those right now for even asking.”
“As you should,” Jazz said. “Most everyone here is straight. It’s our responsibility as the token queer kids to make sure everyone is slightly uncomfortable to the point where they’ll need to have an honest conversation with themselves about their biases.”
They stared at her.
“What?” she asked. “Do I have something on my face?” She reached into her purse, pulled out a compact, and snapped it open. She pursed her lips at her reflection. “Nope. I look amazing, as expected.” She put the compact back in her purse. “What about the two of you?”
“What about us?” Seth asked.
Jazz sighed as if she couldn’t deal with the stupidity of boys. “Are you two going to … you know.” She waggled her eyebrows.
Confused, Nick asked, “Going to what?”
Gibby turned her face toward the ceiling. “It’s like we’re dealing with puppies. Sweet, dumb little puppies.”
“Nick,” Jazz said. “We’ve talked about this. Tonight is a magical night. Perhaps you and Seth will be slow dancing, and then he’ll lean closer, and you’ll lean closer and whisper—”
“Oh my god,” Nick said loudly. “Are you talking about thesex?”
The occupants of the tables closest to them turned and looked at them.
Seth waved at them. “Hey. Having a good night? Us too. Obviously.”
Panicking, Nick blurted, “My dad made a dad joke when he gave me condoms and I don’t know how to feel about that. Like, mad? But also, a little proud? Because it shows the measure of a person to commit to a bit that hard. Also, that was a pun because ofhardandsexand—”
“Your dad gave you condoms?” Seth said, face going pale. “Does he know what they’re for?”
“Oof,” Gibby said. “I really don’t want to be here for this conversation.”
“Of course he does,” Nick said. “They’re for making my life a living hell, just so he can get his kicks. They’re in my pocket right now. I’ll show you.”
Seth grabbed his arm as Nick started to dig through his pocket. “Don’t. We believe you. You don’t need to show us condoms—and notice I’m not even askingwhyyou have them.”
“That’s what I said. We’re both virgins. You’re not going to give me HPV, and even if you did, roughly eighty percent of sexually active people have it, and we could seek treatment togeth—”
Seth sighed. “Not what I meant, Nicky.”
“Yeah,” Gibby said. “I don’t want to leave anymore. This is fine.” She leaned forward, chin resting on her hands as she stared at Nick. “Keep going, Nicky. Did he give you lube too? Because you’re not going to get too far without—”
“Just because you can make your own doesn’t mean you need to relish in my discomfort,” Nick snapped. Then, “Wow. I wish I hadn’t said that.”
Gibby squinted at him. “You really don’t know anything about female anatomy, do you?”
“Of course not! I’m a gay man! Why the hell would I need to know about how you can—mmph!”
“Nope,” Seth said, covering Nick’s mouth with his hand. “Not today, not ever. Gibby, stop it. You’re doing this on purpose.”
“Try and prove it, Gray,” Gibby said, her smile growing entirely too evil for Nick’s liking.
