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Sometimes I felt like an invasion of some intense power, and I always pushed it off. I hadn’t told anyone about it yet, not even Sahlyn. I would find an outlet for it and use it for good. Even if she had given me dark magic, I was determined to find a way to use it for the better. I didn’t want anyone to fear I would turn into some dark entity. For those that understood the transfer of power, I noted the glances of caution when I became passionate in my debates and words. Yes, power rose in my emotions, but nothing felt dark.
I had no idea what would manifest from killing a dark witch queen, but if and when that time came, I would face it as I did everything else, head-on and with my friends at my side. They would face that darkness with me, and I knew in my heart and soul that I would never be alone. That was the difference that would always be between Amira and me. She had felt alone, had allowed herself tobealone. She didn’t let anyone in to help carry her burdens. I loved my friends, my betrothed, and my family. I loved them so much, and I let them in. I let them into my life, my thoughts, and my emotions. They were my light. Honestly, the idea of carrying everything I felt without someone to bounce those fears, doubts, and worries off was terrifying. I would never drift alone in this sea of life because I had so many that were my anchor.
I heard Brienne laugh at something Argen said. I smiled when I thought of the fiery girl. Her bravery would move mountains. She had been whispered away to my family in Geva. Her father had died the year before she was caught stealing an apple from Amira’s gardens. It was only her mother and little brother, and their poverty had put them on the streets in Savine. As soon as Sahlyn had mentioned something to my mother, she insisted on taking them in.
My heart swelled, and a tear fluttered down my lashes. Good people surrounded me. Surrounding yourself with good people and letting them in made the difference.
Brienne would have a remarkable future. She had arrived at the palace with Deven just this morning from Geva and expressed interest to Sahlyn in learning to fight and becoming a Knight. I would do everything in my power to ensure that happened and see her on the right path. Brienne reminded me of a younger self, and Sahlyn saving her made me love him all the more. Sahlyn insisted Brienne, and I could burn down the world and see it rise anew. He might be right.
In this world, in all worlds, in all times, being female isn't always enough. It's a harrowing thought, terrifying but true. Some may always see us as a weaker sex, as nothing but a body to produce babies. And too often, even that right is taken from us. But I will not let it silence me, and I know the women I surround myself with will not let it silence them. Together we will rise. Every woman that's ever dreamed, every woman who wanted to be her own hero, every woman used, abused, and made to fight for things that should have just come to them without a battle—I will fight for them.
Brienne was the beginning. Bereille asking me to be a Knight was an unprecedented move, not something done before. Women were not Knights, but I had earned my place. Instead, I would ensure Brienne and other women who wanted that would have it, and I knew Bereille was the one to lead them. Perhaps two and a half decades ago, women as Knights had been unheard of, but then they hadn’t known me. Autumn Snow. I had never imagined Bereille offering me a position in the prestigious Knights. But I also never imagined fighting demon wolves, sharing blood with a legendary dwarf, breaking his curse, and killing a wicked queen.
Times change, and we must adapt to them.
A wicked woman had brought this country to its knees, and it would take good women toreconstruct. I was honored to be one of them to assist in that restoration.
It had taken a mountain of help to get where we were, but a shiver of pleasure rushed through me when I thought about the curses I had broken and the things I had done. Sahlyn might be my Knight in shining armor, butIwas my own hero.
