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But his mother needs his uncle.

That would make an amazing novel. To read about it would be heart breaking and moving, but to actually experience it, it’s terrifying, dreadful, shameful and so darn beautiful it hurts.

I don’t regret anything, well… apart from stringing Eric along. Nothing good could have come from that and that’s my mistake. No doubt karma will bite me in the arse for that one, although I hope it goes easy on me. I’ve suffered enough already. I’m not sure how much more I can take.

I’m not even sure what I’m doing.

Do I really want this?

I can’t back out now.

It’s when I reach his house in the middle of nowhere that my body begins to betray me by trembling like a leaf. I hate this place… but if it’s where he is, I’ll deal.

Here goes nothing. I knock on the door and wait.

“What are you doing here?” Nathan grips the doorframe, looking as frightened as I feel inside.

But there’s no time for fright. I need courage for what I’m about to do.

I step up to him so my body is flush with his, my eyes level with his throat, and I see the strong corded neck bob in the centre when he swallows before tilting his head down. His eyes widen when I hook my arm around his neck and bring his lips down to mine. At first he’s unresponsive, but I keep insisting he kiss me back by moving my lips over his. Forcing him to take a few steps back, I use my free hand to grip the lapel of his jacket and slide one side over one arm. His mouth parts and I instantly push forward, my tongue entering his mouth, and he tastes divine. Coffee and Nathan.

Like all of our other kisses, my body instantly responds as a scorching heat spreads from my lips to my limbs and to my core, causing it to clench in need. Not want, need. Pure lust and desperation for this man who I shouldn’t want, but Christ do I want him.

His hands come up to grip my arms. For a moment he’s about to push me away. I can tell by the way his body tenses. But at the last second I hold him tighter, not so much that it makes him uncomfortable, but enough to tell him I’m not going down without a fight. Nathan pulls me tighter to him. I feel his abnormally large shaft between us, no doubt pressing uncomfortably against the non-giving fabric of his suit pants. It only makes me needier. Overcome with greed, greed for this man, I push him backwards until his back hits the wall between the living room door and the stairs. His shoulder connects with the light switch, plunging us into darkness.

This is good. Now he can’t see what I’m doing before I do it.

Releasing his neck, I grip the other side of his jacket, relieved when he shifts his arms in a way that helps me tug it from his body completely. My hand searches for the top button of his shirt. I’m grateful he chose not to wear a tie today. It makes my ‘naked Nathan mission’ that much easier to achieve.

“Gwen,” he pants when I finally release his mouth.

I grip the top of his shirt, fuelled by a sexual desire I’ve been denying myself since the first moment he touched me so long ago.

“Don’t talk,” I order on a whisper. “Don’t think.”

Even in the dark I can see the magnificent brown of his eyes as they connect with mine and widen with lust, a hint of fear still lingering on the surface, fear that I’m determined to destroy.

The sound of buttons hitting the ground startles Nathan, or maybe it’s the fact I’ve just ripped his shirt apart. I could have unbuttoned it, but I daren’t give him time to back out. He needs this. I need this.

There’s no hair on his chest save for a light sprinkle of it over his sternum. I make a note of this every time I get the pleasure of seeing it, which isn’t often. Only a dark line of soft hair leads from his navel to the depths below. I love this too.

His chest is smooth and silky, velvet over steel. His solid muscles twitch and quiver as my fingers scrape over them.

Once more my mouth connects with his, but only for a second. My body jolts as I’m thrown over his shoulder. He takes the stairs two at a time before entering my old bedroom.

I’ve not even hit the mattress before his body is covering mine and his lips are assaulting my own. Squeezing his hips with my thighs, I wind my fingers through his hair and my body bucks against him. The dampness that was already between my legs only increases; it’s uncomfortable. My jeans need to go.

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