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My friend comes around the counter with my fork clutched in her hand when I still can’t move or speak, aiming it right at Asher’s chest until he holds his hands up and backs away with a laugh.
“See you soon, sweetheart.” He winks at me, and I have to swallow down the scream that is clawing at my throat as he turns and walks out of the diner.
My phone dings with an incoming text, and I quickly snatch it off the counter, my worry not going away at all when I see it’s not Ryan finally replying to me.
Spencer:Come get your sad boy before he depresses everyone at the bowling alley. What the hell happened to him???
It’s been easy for me to forget about my family and the bullshit back in Chicago. Easy for me to pretend like they don’t exist when I’ve been wrapped up in a bubble of bliss with Ryan, starting a new life on this magical island that makes me forget all my troubles. Forgetting them didn’t make them go away, and I should have known that. They just come back with a vengeance, wreaking havoc and fucking up your life because you’ve ignored them for too long.
I ignored this problem for too long, and now I have to pay the price.
I just hope it doesn’t cost me Ryan.
I spot Ryanas soon as I fly through the doors of the bowling alley, after having run here from The Barge as soon as I got Spencer’s text. I let out a sigh of relief when I see the back of his head, where he sits over at an empty lane behind the computer scoring system, surrounded by people bowling on either side of him, while he just sits there staring into space.
“What the fuck happened today?”
Spencer is suddenly right in my path to Ryan, and I have to quickly jerk to a stop and pull my body back before crashing into him.
“It’s a long story.” I sigh, trying to be nice, even though I want to scream at him to get the hell out of my way so I can get to Ryan.
“Well, fix him, please. He won’t talk to me. He’s just been sitting there staring for hours. He didn’t even laugh at any of my ball jokes. I had some good ones too. Totally wasted on him.”
I just blink at Spencer a few times before he rolls his eyes.
“You’re not even gonna ask to hear one of the ball jokes?”
“I’m going to punch you right in your own balls if you don’t get out of my way,” I mutter.
“Yep! Right. Carry on.” Spencer moves to the side and bows, making a sweeping gesture with his hand.
Since I’m grateful he sent me a text, I keep my fist to myself as I walk by him, glad that Ryan has someone who cares looking out for him when I’m not around.
Guilt stabs into my chest like a knife that I wasn’t there for him today, and he had to deal with Asher alone. I know he’s probably just in shock, and as soon as he sees me and we talk, everything will be fine.
I hurriedly make my way over to him, walking around behind him, and quietly sliding into the seat next to him at the small table the scoring system is attached to. I stare at his profile, willing my heart to stop beating so fast and wiping my sweaty hands off on my jeans when he doesn’t turn to face me or even acknowledge that I’m here.
Shit. This might be worse than I thought.
“No wonder Spencer sent me a text. You’ve hada lotof Shirley Temples. You definitely need a designated driver,” I joke, counting six empty cups with a cherry in them, and a half-filled drink right in front of him, with the cherry floating on top with the ice.
He still doesn’t turn to look at me, and some of the hope I’ve been clinging onto starts to slip away. Swallowing past the lump in my throat, I reach over and rest my hand on his arm, giving it a squeeze.
“I’m so sorry,” I whisper while I stare at the side of his face, just wishing he would look at me.
I don’t even know what I’m apologizing for right now. For Asher, for even dating someone like that in the first place, for not being there with him at dinner, for ignoring my problems, for not being more careful on the phone with Melanie, for even mentioning the mayor thing to her in the first place, for everything I never said, and everything I never warned him about that I should have.
Ryan still doesn’t look at me. He just pushes a piece of paper across the table until it’s in front of me, and he finally speaks. “Did you really send that?”
His voice sounds just as miserable as he looks, and I want to crawl over onto his lap and wrap my arms around him, to give him one of the comforting hugs he always gives me, but I don’t know if that would help matters right now or not. I stay where I am, slowly drop my hand from his arm, and look down at the paper he put in front of me.
“I’m trying really hard not to lose my mind right now, but I don’t think I can handle knowing you actually did this.”
Seeing an old work email in front of me is not at all what I thought he’d lead with, and I’m more than a little confused. And a little annoyed, especially when I see what’s got him so upset right in the middle of the page. “I honestly don’t remember doing this, but I probably did.”
The wounded, miserable sound that comes out of Ryan would have been enough to make me drop to my knees if I was standing right now.
“And you didn’t think to mention it to me that you put Summersweet Island on a fucking list to be screwed over by your family?”
