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Trying not to seem desperate and failing.
“Something I can help you with, m…Jillian.” Gods above, I wanted him to call me mate. More than anything, I just wanted all of this settled. Our matings. Our living situation. Whoever these strangers were that kept lurking around, their presence sticky and meddlesome.
I knew that voice. It had haunted my dreams both asleep and awake for days. My wolf whined for that voice, that body, that mate of mine who wasn’t quite mine yet.
The only sound between us was the scraping of my pen against the paper.
I might have been looking for you. I admit nothing.
“Is that right?” He put down his bucket filled with tools. I didn’t know if he had come from working or was on his way to work, but either way, I was grateful for this moment in the woods. It seemed to be the only thing I could get with Creek. “I was going to work. I’m not scheduled today.”
My face must’ve given away the question on my mind.
“Well, I tried running. Ran my damned wolf until he was pretty pissed off at me. Anyway, there was only one direction he wanted to run, but I didn’t know if you wanted to see me or not. I heard about the stuff with your first mate. The last thing I wanted to do was to confuse you more.” He scratched the back of his head. “I don’t know what to do here. I don’t know how to stay away from you.”
Then don’t stay away.
“Is that what you want?” He stepped closer and extended his hands to me, only to take them back before making contact.
A tear slipped from my right eye as my chest cracked open. I had three mates. Three amazing mates who all seemed to love me in ways that seeped into my hollow spots exactly as I needed, and yet Fate wasn’t quite ready to let me have it all yet.
“Oh gods, I’ve upset you. Come here, mate.” Creek opened his arms. My feet moved of their own will. My body seized up, the tears only the beginning of the frustration I was trying to let go. Yes, running and working helped, but I really needed freedom from this tense pause in my life. There should be freedom in finding your mates.
Instead, there was heartache.
“Honey, it’s going to be okay. Everything will turn out fine because you deserve it. Just breathe and let go. Let it all out. I’m here for you. I promise it will all work out.” His sweet words blanketed me in warmth and calm as one arm held me close and the other hand rubbed my back up and down. His tan T-shirt soaked up my tears while I found solace with my face laid against his chest, right over his heart.
My wolf wallowed in his words. They poured out from his heart so easily, so effortlessly.
We stood there, maybe fifty feet from the mine, the trees and the moss our only audience as he let me cry it out, never pushing me to stop or complaining that I needed to stop. He just let me be who I was and allowed me to express and release without judgment, giving all he was without taking a single thing from me.
Finally, after I was all cried out, I pulled back to look up at him, wrapping my arms around his torso. I pointed to the wet mark on his shirt and cringed.
“I don’t care. It’s just a T-shirt. Are you okay now? I mean, I’m sure you’re not, but are you at least better? Did I help at all?”
He wasn’t as confident as Shane or Dean, but I kind of already loved that about him.
I nodded and reached down to get my notebook. Gathering my courage, I wrote out what I was thinking—no more beating around the bush.
That was exactly what I needed, mate.
His green eyes penetrated me as his Adam’s apple bobbed. He had a sprinkling of freckles on his neck that fascinated me but not as much as him. “I’m glad we cleared that up. We both knew it. ’Bought time we said it.”
A smile rose on my face. Though the issues I was having floated in the back of my mind, right then, I was happy. Creek had brought out my joy.
I gasped and looked to the mine.
Am I keeping you from work?
He chuckled and pulled me in closer. Our bodies were flush and his warmth seeped into me all over again. “I was coming into work just as a volunteer, to keep me busy. Otherwise, I was sitting on my bunk, debating on whether or not to come find you. I actually thought about sitting outside your cabin until you came home. We’ve been restless these past days.”
He rubbed the center of his chest with a closed fist. I knew he was speaking of his wolf and himself. We had been antsy as well.
Too many unsettled things. Felt like a nonstop game of limbo and the pole kept getting closer to the ground.
I’ve missed you.
It was the truth. I missed Creek. I missed Dean. I craved what should’ve been, what should be.
