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“Alrick, please don’t stop,” I begged again as I started rocking my hips. A loud animalistic growl escaped him as his rock-hard manhood pressed into my side.
“I’m losing my mind because of you,” he said breathlessly as his lips passionately pressed onto mine. He tasted so sweet and delicious.
I felt the tension between my legs building. As if he could read my thoughts, he moved his hand faster and faster. It felt so good it almost hurt. My muscles spasmed, and with a few more strokes of his fingers, he pushed me over an edge I’d never known existed.
“Alrick,” I cried his name against his lips, right as the tension in my hot core made way for a prickling relief. For a moment, he held me close, our hearts beating as one. Then he pulled away from our kiss, just enough to look into my eyes.
His mouth opened, but no words came out. He looked like he was in shock. Then he smiled. I smiled too... I was so incredibly happy. How foolish I was to think that power and riches led to true joy. How could any of it ever compare to this?
I wanted to tell him all the thoughts I was having. About these sensations trapped inside me that only he could unleash. I wanted to ask him if he hated me a little less now, could maybe even like me.
But then it hit me. None of this was real. None of it.
He was being paid by my father to get me north. Nothing more, nothing less. And this...this most likely meant nothing to him. Not to Sarolf the carpenter, not to Alrick, the great soldier and lord of the North. He was a man. Frida had told me about the things men did with women. Love or feelings had nothing to do with it. He might still be trying to make certain I paid him when we arrived at my cousin’s.
The burning sensation of tears formed in my eyes as that dreadful knot returned to my throat.
Save yourself, Night Queen. Before this man destroys you.
Looking straight into his blue eyes, I tilted my head. “I will make certain you get paid extra for...this service, Alrick, lord of the mighty mountains of Kulgrat.”
His smile vanished like I’d smacked it off his lips. He let go of me and stepped back. It felt terrible losing his touch. I wanted him to kiss me all over again, to touch me again. I wanted even more. I craved all of him. But I wouldn’t let a man take advantage of me. I wouldn’t let him hammer an irreparable hole into the wall I had built around my heart.
With cheeks still burning hot, I straightened my dress and cleared my throat, ignoring the storm of feelings inside me. “How much silver would you charge for this? Or would it be gold?” I sounded emotionless, bargaining over a service well performed.
The hurt look Alrick gave me stabbed into my heart. It was a mix of shock, pity, and...anger. But against all my expectations, once again, he didn’t yell, scream, or shout. Instead, he smiled.
“No need for gold or silver, Princess. This one, my lovely elf, is on me. If I wanted recompense, I’d find a real woman to do it.”
“How dare you!” I yelled. But Alrick just grinned even wider. A real woman? “I hate you!” I reached for the chimney mantel next to me and grabbed one of the clay pots on it. With all the force I had, I threw it at him, but he was faster. He slipped out the door just as the pot smashed against the wall, shattering into pieces with a loud crash.
I hated Alrick. I did. And I hated myself as well. How pathetic I was, craving a man who despised me. Begging him for pleasure like a cat in heat.
Show some pride, Night Queen.One day, I would be one of the most powerful women on the earth. Kings would bow in front of me. What else could a woman possibly want?
Love. The love of this man and nothing else.
“Weak,” I whispered to myself as my eyes fell on a pair of scissors on the wooden table. They were next to a needle set.
Biting my lip, I walked over and grabbed them. If I wanted to make it north alive, I had to eat. And in order to eat, I had to trade my hair for food.
The image of my mother appeared in front of me. She was sitting next to me in the garden, smiling, her hair shimmering golden in the sun as I ran my little fingers through it. I bit my lip even harder until the memory vanished.
I opened the bun on top of my head and placed a third of my hair between the blades of the rusty old scissors, then froze. A tear rolled down my cheek. Before I could change my mind, I snapped the scissors shut, then grabbed more hair and snapped again. My golden curls dropped in thick strands, again and again, as I cut around the base of my shoulders, a little below my ears. It was just hair. I agreed with Alrick on that. It would take years to grow it back. What would my father think of me now?
When my hand grabbed air, I stopped, my eyes dropping to the table and the long curls piled on top of it. My hand was shaking.
“Stop it,” I scolded myself. “Don’t be weak.”
The sound of the creaking wood door followed by several shuffling feet announced the return of Alrick, Henrike, and the old woman.
I took a deep breath, wiped away my tears, steadied my trembling hands, then confidently turned. My gaze ignored Henrike and the woman and went straight to Alrick. His lips were parted in shock, his eyes wide.
“How much food do we get for this?” I asked, raising my chin. If it was just Henrike and the woman, I might have sounded as strong as I was pretending to be, but seeing the look on Alrick’s face was unbearable.
“What have you done?” The old woman shook her head in shock. “The Rhine King might not take you like this.”
My head jerked back. “What do you mean? You said you wanted my hair in exchange for food. For the market to trade.”
