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Alrick watched me, waiting, his handsome features reflecting the warm tones of the fire.
I cleared my throat.“I mean...”By God, my words were lost again. Just say it. Just do it, coward!
“You should marry me,” I blurted out. There it was! Short and sweet.
Alrick continued to stare, the room had fallen into a deep silence, and only the crackling coal of the fire made any noise.
Finally, he shook his head, as if someone had slapped him. “Would you mind repeating that?” he asked, rubbing the back of his neck as he rose to his feet. “I think I must be tired. I misunderstood you.”
God damn it, Alrick. How can you ask me to find the courage again?
I forced out the breath I’d been holding. Both of my hands nervously fumbled with the fabric of my nightgown. I took another deep breath in.
“I was just thinking earlier...I will have to marry, into the North most likely. You are one of the most favorable suitors, wouldn’t you agree?” I smiled, embarrassed. “I mean, not regarding your family’s status. You’re of a lower rank. Then there is your sister...” I stopped. I sounded like a fool.Maybe that’s why Alrick was staring at me. Eyes wide open, lips slightly parted.
“Marriage?” he finally asked, as if it was the most unthinkable thing. “Did you just say marriage? Are you jesting?” He looked dead serious.
Did he hate me so much that my request offended him? I felt the familiar protective wall come back up. Like a knight on a white horse trying to save me from a monster, the wall demanded me to return to my usual cold self. Insult Alrick, then retreat.
But no, the old me was not who I was any longer. I had survived poverty, hunger, and an attempt on my life. My hair was as short as that of a squire boy. The whole world would laugh at me, and my father would never look at me again. I would be damned if all of it was for nothing.
“Think about it logically. Your estate would greatly benefit from such a marriage, and we get along rather well. With fights, I agree, and your sister is unbearable, but you and I could make it work, I think.”
Alrick frowned. Was I losing my case before it had even been made?
“There would be many more benefits, peace among the noblemen, and an end to the war.”
“By the gods,” Alrick mumbled. “You actually mean it, don’t you?”
I pinched my lips, then looked away. My throat hurt as if I was swallowing fire. If he wanted to turn me down, why not just do so with a simple no? I had made myself vulnerable. Would he mock me?
On their own, my fists clenched as tears pooled in my eyes. This pain of rejection was worse than the hunger or even the attempt on my life. How would I ever recover from such shame and hurt?
“If you hate me too much to even consider, a simple no will do. You still owe me some respect. I am the daughter of the Rhine King, and—”
Suddenly he was right in front of me, pulling me into his arms. His body was warm against mine. He lifted my chin with his hand. I could see the desire and longing in his eyes.
“Hate you?” he said in a low voice. “I am mad for you. I think I’m going insane. At night, I lay awake thinking about your smile, the taste of your lips, the way your eyes sparkle when you get passionate...and during the day, I can’t help but watch your every move.”
“You—you do?” I blinked.
His eyes darted to my lips, then back to my eyes. “Do you sincerely mean it?” he asked, as if afraid it was all a dream, and he would wake any minute. “Marriage...this...”
With my trembling hand, I ran a finger along the scar on his face. “I do.”
“Then you are mine,” he said before our lips met. He kissed me as if he had been starving for my mouth his whole life. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer. The moment our bodies melted together, I felt his hard manhood press against my stomach. It unleashed an untamed desire inside me. A burning hot flame. I was drunk with lust.
His lips ran a hot trail down the side of my neck as I dragged him onto the blankets on the floor. I laid on my back and pulled him on top of me. Although I had never been with a man before, my body seemed to know exactly what to do. My legs spread and wrapped around his waist, opening wide for him.
A low growl escaped his lips as I moved my hips beneath him. I could feel his hardness press against my soft center.
“Mina...this gift can only be given once,” he moaned. “And if you give it to me, you will be mine and mine alone until my last breath.”
I ran my fingers down his chest to the strings of his pants. My body was shaking in anticipation as I clumsily untied them.
“Good” was all I said before I took hold of his rock-hard flesh. He groaned and pulled my wool gown up over my head.
“Tell me to stop, now, or I will claim you.” He gently took the peak of my left breast between his lips and sucked it. I moaned.
