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Ilya huffed. After a moment, she asked, “Are you bringing home your man?”
“No, he does not belong there,” Tess stated firmly. Whatever had happened between them these last few days, it was over now. He hated her again. This time with good reason.
“You cannot hide who you are.”
“I can and I will,” she argued.
“Forever?”
“Yes, if that’s how long it takes.”
“What about when you come home?”
“My trips there will stop when Mama and Papa are gone.” She hadn’t meant to tell her. She was just planning to let it happen. Nobody would notice then.
“This is your home, Terezilya. Forever!” Ilya yelled at her, something her sister rarely did.
“No, Ilya, it has not been my home for a long time,” Tess reminded her sister, though her sister had never once seen any of the places she lived over the years.
“This is your home,” Ilya stated firmly.
“Thisis my home, Ilya, and this is where my child will be raised. That means that I need to be here. We will have to be American. I have to stop being Russian for her, Ilya.”
“You can stop being Russian, Terezilya, but you will forever be a part of this family,” Ilya replied, calmer now than she had been before.
“You do not know, Ilya, because you have never left. I have been apart from you guys for almost twenty years. I have to just walk away because I don’t fit in anyway.” Tess felt a tear run down her cheek. Her anger had subsided, and now she was just left with pain.
“You have chosen to keep everything in little boxes, but all those boxes make you Tess. Even the ones that say Terezilya on them,” Ilya said quietly.
“I have to go. I will call you when I am closer,” Tess replied, ending the call. She didn’t know if Ilya would call back, but she assumed Ilya would call Tasha first.
Looking around, she realized that she was a few miles past the turn-off to Mathias’s house. But she had no time to stop, no time to just let him hold her until some of the pain of losing her father forever was gone.
Without any warning, her little car shuddered and sputtered for a moment, then shut off completely despite the speed she was going. Steering became nearly impossible, making Tess hit the ditch at a speed that propelled her through a clump of trees. The front of her car hit one large enough to stop her instantly—it was only the airbag that prevented her head from slamming into the steering wheel.
Sitting silently in the middle of a tree grove in her now destroyed little red car, her sanctuary, her only way home, Tess tried to start the engine again. Maybe? But nothing happened. It turned over, but no sound came, and no engine roared to life. Her little car was dead, and with it, her way home and the last little bit of who she was.
CHAPTER25
Taking out his phone,he looked at her text again. How could he respond to that? What could he say to make her see he had messed up? Maybe he should just call and see if she would answer. But he knew better than that; she wouldn’t answer him regardless.
“Hey, Hue,” he said as the phone in his hand rang.
“Morning, Math.” Hue’s formal tone made Math stop. Something was up.
“What’s wrong?”
“I’m about a mile north of your place. Tess is okay.” Hue’s words made Math’s blood run cold. Why would he say she was okay? Was it possible she wouldn’t be okay? “But her car is not. She went off the road and hit a tree.”
“Is she hurt?” Math asked in concern, getting up from the floor and heading down the steps.
“Yes, it wasn’t bad. But she won’t get out of the car.”
“You’ve talked to her?” Pushing through the door into the warm sun, he quickly went to his truck still in the bank parking lot.
“Yep. She says if you give it a minute, it will start again. It won’t. Norm won’t get to it until late tonight, maybe tomorrow,” Hue said.
“I’ll be there in a minute.” Math climbed into his pickup and headed toward his place.
