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JACE
After I convinced Allie to let me buy her winter clothes, I took her out to her favorite restaurant from sophomore year—Mustang Ranch. License plates on the walls, ‘90s music on the stereo, and burgers the size of my fist, Mustang Ranch hadn’t changed one bit.
“I haven’t been here in so long!” Allie said, sliding into the red booth. “It’s too far away from Redwood to walk, and Imani hates burgers this big. I think the last time I came here was … with you.” Allie opened the menu and glanced up at me. “When was the last time you were here?”
I grasped the menu in my hands and told myself not to fuck this up.
“Sophomore year,” I admitted, nervously looking back up at her.
What was wrong with me today? Allie had never made me this nervous before, but … that had been when I wanted her to loathe me. Now, I wanted her to love me again. I had waited two entire years for this moment—to be able to bring Allie out on dates again. If I said or did the wrong thing, I could lose her for good.
Through those cute-as-fuck, new circular-framed glasses, she stared at me with wide eyes. “You haven’t been back here since we stopped dating?” she asked in disbelief. “You didn’t bring Jenny or Nicole or anyone else here?”
A wave of disappointment washed through me, and I slumped my shoulders forward. I had screwed Allie up so much by bringing Nicole to the Overlook that Allie didn’t trust me not to spoil any of our other places. It had shown in the way she didn’t want me to touch her at the mall, the way she’d kept pulling away and walking a few steps ahead.
Those little rejections fucking hurt me bad. But not as bad as I must’ve hurt her.
“This is your favorite restaurant,” I said to Allie, placing the menu down and leaning forward.
I glanced at her hand, wanting to wrap it up in mine but then thought against it. When she noticed me looking, she didn’t pull her hand away but instead inched it closer a few millimeters, as if she wanted me to take it but didn’t have the courage to ask.
I placed my hand inches from hers and smiled. “I was a dick, but I didn’t ruin every one of our places. I promise.”
Her chin trembled slightly as tears filled her eyes. “I love you,” she whispered, so low that I almost didn’t hear it. “I want to pretend like nothing happened and go back to the way things were before, but … I can’t forget, no matter how hard I try. I’m so nervous that you’re going to hurt me again and leave me.” More tears raced down her cheeks. “I want to be with you so bad that it hurts.”
I gulped down the lump in my throat and brushed her tears away. “Take your time, Allie,” I whispered, tucking some hair behind her ear. “I can wait until you feel comfortable. I know it’s going to take time.”
To my surprise, Allie placed her hand on mine and interlocked her fingers with mine. She pulled it away from her face and kissed my thumb, smiling against it. She stayed quiet for a few moments, then sat up taller and leaned forward, trying to let go of the pain with a forced smile and a different conversation.
“So, um … I heard from Kai that you were hiding a dildo in your football locker,” she teased.
Of course it was fucking Kai who had embarrassed me in front of the entire damn football team. But if that was his payback, I’d be fine because Poison did some pretty fucked up shit. This was an easy punishment.
My lips curled into a smile, and I decided to go along with it. “Was it big enough for you?” I asked, sending her a wink. “Thought we could test it out. Let you put it in your tight little pussy, like I’d promised, and make you watch me take you from behind.”
Allie scrunched her nose. “Gross. I don’t know where that thing has been. For all I know, Carter could’ve put it in his ass, then stuffed it in my locker along with all the other shit I found in there.” She shivered. “I wouldn’t put it past him.”
I tensed at the sound of his name and pushed my shoulders back. “You need to stay away from him and tell me the next time he tries to talk to you. He’s not fucking sane, Allie, and I don’t want to hear from Jamal that Carter was flirting with you.”
All the blood drained from her face, yet she shook her head. “He’s just being a dick, like the rest of the guys on the football team. I can handle him, Jace. He’s not your problem.”
“Everything you do is my problem. I have to protect you.”
It was what I had been doing for years now. Just because I had football and Dad to worry about didn’t mean I could stop trying to protect her from other stupid-ass people, like Carter, who wouldn’t stop talking about her at practice.
Allie rolled her eyes. “Come on, Jace. If anything happens, I can talk to Kai about it. You need to focus on your dad and football. Don’t let Carter get you kicked off the team during your senior year.”
I glanced down at the menu in front of me and drew circles on the table with my finger.
Allie tensed. “Oh my God. Please don’t tell me that you already got kicked off.”
I clenched my jaw and tightened my hand into a fist. If Coach had let me fucking finish him, I would’ve been happily kicked off the team. Nobody touched Allie without her permission, and nobody flirted with my girl, especially not a dick like him.
Allie smacked my chest from across the table and shook her head. “Jace!”
“I didn’t get kicked off the team,” I said.
She sighed in relief. Despite all the rage and anger I felt for Carter right now, I actually smiled. Allie cared so much about me playing football. Even when we hadn’t been speaking, even when it was negative two degrees Fahrenheit outside, she showed up for my games and cheered on Redwood.
