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JOÃO
That afternoon, I grabbed Ana’s hand and walked through Redwood Grocery. After I told her that Mom died, she hadn’t been that cheery, happy girl that she usually was. She had been walking around Landon’s place like a zombie, just going through the motions.
While I didn’t blame her—because what person could really come to fucking terms that their family wasn’t alive?—I didn’t want her to feel like shit anymore, so I decided that I’d make brigadeiros with her tonight and ask Imani to come over.
“Do you want chocolate or rainbow sprinkles?” I asked, staring at the selection in the baking aisle. They had sprinkles for every fucking occasion here, it seemed, because these rich people had celebrations for everything. “They have blue too, if you want.”
Ana stood quietly by my side, not saying a word.
I placed the sprinkles down and crouched to her level. “Come on, Ana,” I said, poking her stomach and hoping to get a smile out of her. “I texted Imani to see if she wants to make some with us. Don’t you want to make them? They’re our favorite.”
“It’s not the same,” Ana whispered, staring at the ground.
My lips curled into a frown, and I gently grasped her small chin and lifted her face, so she was looking right at me. Tears lay heavily in her eyes, her small lips in a frown.
“I know it’s not the same. I know it will never be the same.”
“I miss her,” she said. “So much.”
“Me too.”
“You do?” she asked.
“Yes. I think about her all the time.”
“But you don’t cry.”
All I wanted was to be Ana’s strong big brother, the type of guy she looked up to when she needed to talk to someone or tell secrets to, the guy who would kick anyone’s ass who hurt her. I didn’t want her to see me sad.
But that was what I was.
“I cry sometimes,” I whispered, brushing some hair out of her face. “I cried when I found out. Imani held me all night, like I hold you when you cry. I do get sad, Ana. She was our mom who’d been with us forever. That’s why I want to make brigadeiros with you because that’s something you guys loved doing together.”
“Yeah,” Ana said softly, “we did.”
“So, are you going to make some with me, or do I have to do it myself?”
After a couple moments, Ana smiled, her eyes lighting back up, and nodded eagerly at me. She grabbed my hand and turned toward the sprinkles. “I think I want the blue ones. Blue was Mama’s favorite color. She would be so happy.”
“Blue it is.” I grabbed the blue sprinkles from the aisle and tossed it into our basket. “Now, we have to find some condensed milk and cocoa powder.”
“I know where it is!” Ana said, running ahead and toward the next aisle.
When she left my sight, I quickly followed after her because we weren’t the most popular people in Redwood right now. Who the fuck knew who was here and wanted to hurt us in some way? Akio’s parents could be hiding around the corner.
Ana stood halfway down the next aisle, staring up at the condensed milk. She stood on her tiptoes, trying to grab a can from a higher shelf. I let out a deep breath when I saw her and walked toward her.
A young woman smiled at her and grabbed the condensed milk for her, and then she crouched down to her level and handed it to her. “Here you go,” she said with a grin. “You gotta grow a little bit taller to reach all the way up there.”
Once she took the can, Ana gave the woman an uncomfortable smile. “Thank you.”
I eyed the woman and stood behind Ana, placing my hand on her shoulder to let this woman know that Ana wasn’t to be messed with. The woman looked like she had innocent intentions, but so did the rest of the Redwood rich on the outside.
“You know,” the woman continued talking to Ana, “I heard you talking to your brother about your mom, and I wanted to tell you that I’m so sorry. A little girl like you should never have to grow up without a mother. It’s too bad, what happened to her.”
Gritting my teeth, I yanked Ana away from the woman and started back down the aisle to find the cocoa powder. Who the fuck had that much audacity to say that to a little girl? Who the hell was she anyway?
Like a fucking snake, the woman followed us. “It’s a shame, what she did to herself.”
