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He’s making the break. Closing himself off and shutting me out.

I crumple back into the seat, looking out my side window so he won’t see the tears. If he happened to look, which he doesn’t. “Okay.”

I’m not angry. I’m just… sad.

When he pulls up curbside to Terminal 5, I’m out of the car and dragging my bags from the back before Axel can unfold from the driver’s seat. I’m barely holding myself together, and the only thing that matters is getting on the other side of the doors before I completely break down.

This is going to be fast. Like ripping off a bandage.

He closes the trunk, and I push a smile to my face.

“Thank you, Axel. For the ride. For the job and the place to stay.” He’s shaking his head, the frown on his face deepening by the second. I hold up a hand, needing to finish. “But most of all, thank you for letting me love your son and helping me to stop waiting for life to start and to start living it.”

Axel pulls me into his chest, his powerful arms wrapping tight around me as his head comes down to mine. “Thank you for saving me. For giving Otto what he needed most. For sharing your heart and soul with us. With me.”

I take a breath and push to my toes to press a kiss to Axel’s rough jaw. I start to pull back, but the arms around me tighten, holding me where I am. I can feel his breath heavy in my hair, the light scrape of his stubble as his head begins to turn, his mouth shifting closer, closer.

My heart hangs in the balance, but then a shrill whistle blows, and a woman in uniform hollers about unloading only.

I’m set back as he clears his throat. “Time for your dreams to come true, Nora.”

If that were true, I wouldn’t be standing here. I’d be home with Otto. Axel’s arms around us both. The three of us building a family.

But that’s not what he wants. So instead, I’ll be building a foundation of work experience for my future. Which is important.

It’s what I’m focusing on as I push the unwilling words past my lips. “Goodbye, Axel.”

He watches as I go. Stands there with one hand raised in a wave that won’t complete, an expression that’s sad but steady and simply breaks my heart.

Inside the terminal, I can barely see past the tears. I drag my bags over to the small seating area and try to pull myself together. Stop the great hiccupping sobs so there’s a chance I’ll be able to get through security. I retrieve my phone with shaking hands. Swiping at the tears that won’t stop, I stare at my screen filled with a picture of Otto tucked against Axel’s shoulder, his daddy smiling at me from above him. My two favorite faces in all the world, so beautiful to me I can barely breathe.

This is the worst of it.

This minute.

It gets better from here.

That’s what I keep telling myself. The promise I keep making… even though I’m a liar, and I know it.

Chapter 21

Axel

“Imiss Fun Wrecker,” Boomer sulks, taking his turn to try to quiet Otto’s inconsolable cries by slow-dancing him around the living room. He’s got shit moves today, and Otto knows it, ramping up the wails until I wave them over, holding out my hands for my son.

“It’s okay, buddy. Daddy’s got you.”

Only he takes one accusatory look at me and lets out another furious cry.

I get it. I’m angry at me too. The woman we love is gone because I let her go.

Fuck, I practically made her go.

“Nah, this isn’t going to work.” Bowie shakes his head, setting his water on the coffee table and coming over to where we’re sitting by the window. “You’re as messed up as he is. It’s making him cry harder. I’ve got the touch. Give him to me.”

Bowie takes Otto, and within thirty seconds, hands him back, still bawling.

Boomer looks up to the ceiling, grumbling. “If you mean your touchputs women to sleep, D-Man, not the same thing.”

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