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“Yeah, I have good days and bad ones. The memories kick my ass sometimes, but the counsellor I had before they discharged me helped. He referred me to someone local so I can keep going. I’ve got my first appointment coming up, so….”
Katy
“Boo, you’re exhausted.” Katy smiled down at Con, sitting half asleep on the couch. The pet name had started as a joke when Con had copped a busted up nail by slamming his thumb in the door of a car he’d been tinkering with. When Katy saw the Band-Aid around it, she’d teased him about having a boo boo, and it’d stuck.
“I’ve set you up in the spare room. Wanna come get settled?”
“Thanks, Cupcake.” He stood slowly, taking a moment to shake the sleep beginning to take over. “Lead the way.”
After she’d shown Con to his room, Katy entered the one she shared with Levi and closed the door gently. She leaned back against it, closing her eyes. She could sense her man close to her—he was always so warm, such a rock-solid strength. “He was hurt, Lee. His shoulder is all scarred up.” A sob hitched in her throat, and she leaned into Levi’s embrace.
“He’s here with us, and he’s safe now. We don’t have to be scared for him anymore.”
“I missed him, babe. I know it sounds ridiculous, but a part of me was missing when he was gone.” Levi smiled softly at her, and Katy knew she’d just voiced exactly what her boyfriend had thought so many times before. Levi had taken Con’s enlistment hard. He’d grieved for months for his best friend, and it hurt her watching him missing his partner in crime so desperately. They’d been inseparable for such a long part of their lives that suddenly apart, Katy knew he’d felt alone, lonely, even though their relationship was strong.
All her friends were getting married—it was all they talked about. They’d asked her time and again why Levi hadn’t proposed, why she wasn’t pushing him. It only took one of them to see the wall of photos in their living room to have a go at Levi saying that there were three people in their relationship rather than two. Katy had brushed it off. She was never in competition with Connor for Levi’s affection; it’d never been like that between them. How could she be jealous that a piece of Levi’s heart was missing, gone with the man who was his childhood best friend? In the short time she’d known Con, he’d captured her heart too. She loved him as much as Levi did, and the countless emails they’d shared, secrets they’d revealed, and fears they’d spoken of had strengthened that friendship over the years.
And now the light in Levi’s eyes was back. The man holding her wasn’t worrying anymore. He wasn’t scared that his best friend could easily die by the enemy’s hand. Levi had come to life again in those few hours since Con had arrived, and the joy of seeing it made her heart explode with love for her man.
She cupped his face, and he pinned her against the door, kissing her deeply. A slow melding of their mouths, while he undressed and worshipped every inch of her body over and over again, had Katy breathing hard, quickly taking her to the knife’s edge of bliss. Sensation ricocheted around her body, stealing her breath. Levi down on his knees, his gaze filled with pent-up desire and need, had Katy catapulting off the edge. She couldn’t keep her eyes open as her orgasm washed over her. Moaning Levi’s name, she floated as her heartbeat thundered in her veins, her breath sawing in and out of her lungs. The endorphins crashed around in her body, reviving her orgasm when Levi lifted and pressed into her in one slow stroke.
Her second orgasm was a slow burn, consuming her as it went on and on. Levi was right there with her, stilling as he found his own ecstasy. Grunting, he pressed his face against her shoulder, brushing his lips over her collarbone. It made her shiver, and when he did it again, she laughed.
Carrying her, Levi staggered towards the bed, and they collapsed on it, a tangle of sweaty, satiated limbs. Curled around her, Levi was soon fast asleep, but it didn’t come as easily for Katy. Her body still tingling, she lay awake thinking about the man in their guest room and the scars marring his shoulder and back. He’d never told them he was injured, and it came as a shock seeing the angry red lines when he’d peeled off his snug black T-shirt. Her heart broke knowing neither she nor Levi could have helped him. Had he been in hospital? How long had he suffered in pain? She knew he suffered from PTSD; he’d told them that was the reason he’d been discharged. But seeing the physical signs as well as how shaken up he was after his flashback, had every instinct telling her that their friend, their brave, loyal warrior needed them more than ever.
Katy jolted awake, her body suddenly on high alert. Blinking her tired eyes and waiting for her sleep-addled brain to catch up to her tense muscles, she heard the noise again. Groans and mumbles.Is it Con?“No, Rob, stay with me. Keep focussed on me. Come on, open your eyes. Stay with me.” His pained sobs were getting louder and more distressed, crying out, “No, no, no, buddy, no.”
She threw off the covers and shook Levi awake. “Lee, babe, get up. Con’s having a nightmare.” It only took him a moment before he launched out of bed, pulling a pair of boxer briefs from his drawer and tossing Katy his T-shirt that lay discarded on the floor. Dashing into the hallway, they were both still pulling on their clothes as Levi twisted the knob and stumbled into Connor’s room.
Katy flicked on the lamp and sat down on the bed, running her fingertips down Con’s injured arm. Drenched in sweat, the sheet tangled around his naked hips, Connor tossed and turned.
“Con, you’re safe. You’re home. Wake up, boo,” Katy crooned, fighting back tears. Seeing him like this destroyed her, ravaged her heart like the bloodied aftermath of a battle. Levi sat down on the other side of the bed, and gently shook him awake. The pain etched on Levi’s features was as deep as Con’s anguish. She couldn’t erase his memories, but she would do everything in her power to help him heal. Katy gently wiped the tears staining his cheeks with her thumbs and Con blinked open his eyes.
In the lamplight, she saw his pupils blown with pain and fear as Con looked sightlessly around. His muscles were locked tight, and tension radiated from him as he struggled to get up, fighting their gentle touches. Katy understood in that moment how much his fight-or-flight impulse had kept him safe. Even half awake, his body was primed to attack whoever stood in the way of his survival. But she wasn’t scared of him. She didn’t see him as dangerous, or broken. No, this was Con,theirConnor. Levi laid a steadying hand on Con’s chest, not holding him down, just connecting them together while she kept touching him, continued speaking softly to him. Letting her gentle caresses bring him fully awake, it took a moment for Con to focus on her. And when he did, Katy’s heart stuttered. His heartache was right there, visible in the slumped set of his shoulders, his watery eyes. His vulnerability—so different from the strength of her soldier—was like a knife to her heart. She didn’t hesitate as she took him into her arms. “It’s okay, boo. It’s over. We’ve got you.”
“Oh God, I’m sorry,” he breathed, hugging her hard. Levi’s strong arms wound around both of them, protecting them in his embrace as Con’s chest heaved, his heart hammering against Katy’s ribs while he cried on her shoulder. She ran her fingers through Con’s spiky hair doing the only thing she could while his tears fell—she comforted him. Slowly, he settled, but she didn’t stop playing with his hair. Levi’s arms still around them both and her ministrations had Con’s tense muscles slowly relaxing.
“Lie down, boo. I’ll stay with you until you’re asleep,” Katy whispered to him.
“We both will, Con. You’re home now, we’re here for you,” Levi rumbled, his voice still sleep roughened.
“I’m sorry.” Con shook his head. Katy didn’t understand why he kept apologizing. How could he be worried about waking them? “I didn’t want to stick you with my problems, but I was being selfish. I should have stayed away.”
“We’re here for you, Con. You aren’t alone anymore.” Levi rubbed his hand over Con’s shoulders. The remaining tension melted from the other man’s body, leaving him trembling in Katy’s arms.
“Do you want to talk about what happened?” she probed gently, kissing his temple. His head against her shoulder, his big body curled around hers, he stiffened when she asked the question.
“I can’t tonight, Cupcake.” He shook his head and wiped his eyes again. “It’s too raw.”
Levi rubbed the other man’s arms, soothing him. “Close your eyes, Con. Get some sleep. We’ll stay as long as you want.”
Con laid down and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. But he looked like a deer in headlights, terrified to close his eyes. She knew she had to be strong for him, but she couldn’t hold back her tears. She was so very grateful he’d come back to them. But he was hurting, and seeing it so raw and unfiltered, ripped her heart open, leaving a great gushing wound there. She wanted to share his pain, to relieve some of his burden.But can I?Katy curled into his warm body, resting her head on his shoulder, petting his chest, giving him what little comfort she could. She was on top of the sheet, Con under. Levi was the same—stretched out on the other side of him above the covers. She caught Levi’s eye and smiled sadly as he kept a hand on Con’s shoulder.
TWO
Connor
Asheen of sweat coated his skin, typical for summer nights in the desert. But something was off. Half asleep and dazed, Connor’s head pounded out a beat like he’d partied far too hard at a nightclub. He moaned. Hangovers were a bitch. But he didn’t remember drinking anything. Memories of the previous night’s dinner party flooded back—good food, great company, albeit a bit uncomfortable to begin with because of his episode, and later lots of laughter. The stress, the self-doubt had faded away in the safety of his friends’ home. But that’d been overshadowed by his nightmare. It was so damn vivid. He could practically taste the cordite hanging in the air from the gunfire, smell the copper tinge of blood blooming out over his friend’s throat and pooling on the ground below him. Watching his brother in arms die before him again never got easier. Seeing the light fade from his eyes, the spark of life dying with him clawed his heart out every time he experienced it. Connor wished it was the first time, but the nightmares were persistent bastards. The counsellors said that was normal. Didn’t make him feel any better about it though.
