Page 14 of Three of Us

“You were the one who mentioned lantana.”

“You were the dickhead who said there was a noxious weed growing out here. Lantana was the first thing I thought of.”

I took a deep breath and blew it out slowly, but my words had an edge to them that made Sam flinch. “So, let me get this straight. There’s no weed. There’s nothing that you’re worried could poison the cattle. It was all made up?” I glanced at Sam. He nodded, his eyes downcast and shoulders slumped. I moved my eyes to the rear-view mirror, and Craig met my stare but couldn’t hold it. He nodded too. “I don’t do liars. I won’t put up with it. Trust is everything to me; I won’t accept anything but honesty. In saying that, I get what you were trying to do, and I appreciate it, even if it would have been just as easy to say ‘grab your swimmers, we’re going to the waterhole.’ Got it?”

“Got it.” Sam nodded.

“Sorry, Ally. Won’t do it again.”

“Okay then. So, no walking around looking for weeds. We’ve got a picnic, a billabong, and a few hours up our sleeves. Shame we didn’t bring swimmers.”

“Who needs swimmers? We’ll swim in our jocks.” Craig laughed as he got out of the four-by-four and made his way to the back.

“I’m not fucking wearing any,” Sam muttered under his breath. I laughed at the irony of that. Maybe, just maybe today might be the day that they finally get it through their thick heads that I don't want to be friend-zoned anymore.

“Neither am I.” I shrugged and slipped out too, going to grab my backpack. When I pulled it out, I noticed the folded towels that had been hidden by the esky. “You guys remembered towels, but not swimmers or undies?”

“Craig remembered towels. I was too stressed out about you nutting me for lying to you to get you out here.”

I slipped my hand in his and squeezed. “Thank you. Means a lot that you wanted to do something for me.”

“Always, Ally.” Sam lifted my hand and kissed it. “You’re like a sister to us.”

My gut sank like an anvil had been dropped into it. My head spun, not because I’d had some delusional thoughts that I was irresistible, but because of how badly I’d misread the situation. They hadn’t been flirting with me; they were apparently treating me like their little sister. And I’d gone and done something stupid like fall in like with them. It was bad enough that there were two of them.

God, what a mess.

There was a song that Ma and Nan used to play from the sixties or something that had a line in it about crying on your birthday. I was about to do it. Damn it, it wasn’t bloody fair. I liked them and I’d been friend-zoned. By not just one of them, but both. I was a right muppet for even thinking that I’d had a chance.

I pulled my hand away from Sam’s and smiled a smile that I was sure looked as brittle as I felt at that moment. One comment from him would make me shatter into a million pieces. I gritted my teeth and pulled my shoulders back. I would not let this get me down. I wouldn’t. If I liked them more than either liked me, neither one was the right man for me. I deserved better than that.

By the time I’d trudged to the water’s edge, Craig had set the esky down and his boots and socks were off. I raised an eyebrow at him, and he grinned, the larrikin in him showing. “Comin’ in?”

I still needed to process my thoughts. Accept the fact these blokes just wanted to be friends when I’d hoped —and believed, maybe naively—that there could be more between us. “Yeah. Nah. I’ll just sit out here for a bit.”

Sam looked at me and visibly swallowed. “I’ll stay with Ally.” I waved him off, spread out the picnic blanket Ma had packed and sat down, wishing I had a book with me to disappear into. When I settled myself, I saw Craig running, his lily-white arse flashing us a full moon, as he whooped and cannonballed into the water. The bank fell away quickly from the small beach I was sitting on, into deeper water that you had to dive under the surface a good few metres to reach.

After he’d resurfaced, Craig shook his head. Water dripped from his blond hair, darkening it to an ash colour as the drops beaded down his face while he treaded water. “Come in, Sam. It’s bloody beautiful.”

“Nah, all good.”

I shot a look at him. More like a glare. “I won’t look. Wouldn’t want you—”

“Ally—”

“Sam, just...” I blew out a breath that was more a growl and shook my head. My tone was clipped. I sounded pissed even to my own ears. I didn’t want to be an immature, selfish princess, but bloody hell, I didn’t want to be babysat by my big brother either. Thankfully, Sam didn’t need me to explain myself. He got the message and stripped off his boots and socks, followed by his shirt. I tossed him two towels that he slung over the low hanging branch of a tree growing at a steep angle over the water and looked away. I didn’t see him take off his jeans, but I heard them land next to me as he gingerly toed towards the edge. He slipped into the water silently, the ripples in the water the only evidence that he’d just entered it. Where Craig was a loud-mouthed cheeky bugger, Sam was always quieter. More introverted.

I turned to face them when I heard thrashing and watched as I kicked off my RM Williams boots, toed out of my socks, and sat in bare feet. Craig was splashing Sam, while Sam shielded his face. Finally, Sam went under and within a moment, Craig went wide-eyed and was pulled under too. They broke the water together and laughed, Sam splashing Craig before shaking his hair out and treading water.

“Boys, try not to splash too much. The crocs tend to be drawn to you if you do.” I smiled sweetly at them. I expected that they’d swim to the shore like they were being chased, but they didn’t do that. Instead, the colour drained from Craig’s face and within a split second, he’d launched himself at Sam. There was no playful splashing this time though. Craig’s movements were short. Sharp. Urgent. He meant business. He thought I was serious. Both of them did. Within a split second, Craig had wrapped an arm around Sam and used powerful strokes to shift them to the edge. Craig was pushing Sam, getting him out first, looking over his shoulder, ready to shield Sam with his body.

I was already on my feet, scrambling to them. Running to the water’s edge to meet them. “I was joking. Shit, I’m sorry. It was a smart-arsed comment. I should have realized that… fuck. I’m sorry.”

“What?” Sam now stood before me, starkers and breathing hard. He gripped Craig’s hip and pushed him further up the bank, out of the way of the imaginary danger.

“I’m sorry. Scottie used to scare me, telling me there were crocs in the water. It became our inside joke. There aren’t any crocs. It’s perfectly safe. I wouldn’t have let you get in if there was any danger.” That immature, selfish princess I didn’t want to be? Well, I’d officially crossed the line. It wouldn’t have surprised me if they’d grabbed their towels and stormed off to the Landcruiser. Or if they left me there either. But I knew they wouldn’t, not out here and not in summer. Get lost and they’d be recovering a body. Scottie would have made that clear to them the first day they were here—he rehearsed his speech with every new person on the station—and he wasn’t wrong.

Sam and Craig shared a look. An intense stare that communicated so much more than words could say. Thank you. I love you. You protected me. I want you. It only lasted a millisecond, but it was as if the shroud over my eyes had been lifted. Everything slotted into place. I was right to wonder whether there was more between them. Their easy familiarity, their inseparability. Craig’s protectiveness and Sam’s innate way of looking for Craig whenever they were apart. I understood now why they’d never like me the same way I was hooked on them. They were in love with each other. It was clear that they worked hard to hide their affection from the world, and I resolved to never out them. The knowledge settled and I fell a little harder for them, not in that “I want a gay best mate” way, but because they’d made their relationship work. They were solid. Made for each other.

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