AllFreeNovel
Share Us
The rushing noise of the city hit him full force. Horns and the rumble of cars, bikes and trucks, and the rattle of jackhammers. Sirens. People talking and heels clicking on concrete pathways. The crinkle of wrappers and tinkle of ice. Phoenix gasped and filled his lungs with air. He coughed and gasped again, the crushing hold on him finally loosening as he pulled himself up onto a raised garden bed that doubled as a seating area and rested his elbows on his knees.
He closed his eyes, and Jake’s vivid blue ones morphed to green. Were they Cassidy’s he was picturing or Pete’s? He was messed up. Pining over lost lovers and a friend who clearly didn’t feel the same. But he needed that friend right now. He needed the comfort that his former flatmate provided. The unwavering friendship was born of years of familiarity.
Phoenix fished his phone out of his jacket pocket and, with shaking hands, brought up Pete’s number. He dialled, not even knowing if he had reception a few hours southwest of Longreach in the middle of the desert. Luck was apparently now on his side, and the crackle of a sketchy line sounded before Pete’s voice came over the phone, “G’day, Phoenix. How are things in the big smoke?”
“Pete,” he choked. “I…” A sob got caught in his throat, and Phoenix sucked in a shuddery breath.
“Talk to me, Phoenix. What’s going on?” Pete’s voice had morphed from laid-back and happy to serious and all business in the blink of an eye. The concern in his voice choked him up even more. “It’s okay, I’m here. Take your time.”
“Everything’s gone to shit,” he cried, wiping the tears that were now falling without pause. “I can’t breathe.”
“I need you to close your eyes, Phoenix, and focus on my voice.” He did. After a few minutes of Pete leading him through a slow breathing exercise and reassuring him over and over that he was okay, the weight crushing his chest lessened enough that he could talk. He wasn’t sure whether the nutshell summary of the clusterfuck his life had just become made sense, but Pete had heard enough to know he was teetering. “You sound like you need a break, my friend.”
“I can’t get away.”
“Your mental health is more important than everything, Phoenix. If you can’t function, you can’t look after your clients. You know I’m right. Call in sick, run a bath and soak for a while.” There was a shuffling on the phone like a hand was being placed over it and a muffled conversation in the background.
“G’day, Phoenix, I’m Scottie,” a deep voice floated over the airwaves to him, and a pang of jealousy hit him. This was the man his friend had fallen for. “Pete’s throwin’ some clothes into his bag, but he won’t be there until tomorrow. You think you’ll be okay until then?”
“I need to get out of here,” he mumbled, looking around at the unfamiliar faces. He wanted to go home. He wanted to curl up in his bed and sleep, but it’d been weeks since he’d had an unbroken night’s rest. His dreams were filled with jumbled memories and long since completed exams that he didn’t feel prepared for morphing into courtroom failures. He couldn’t slow his mind down, even now when he felt completely detached from his own body, like a prisoner in someone else’s skin.
“Okay, we can help. Get yourself to the airport. We’ll get you on a plane into Longreach, and we’ll be there to pick you up.”
Phoenix shook his head, his heart rate tripling and his breath coming faster. “No planes. I can’t breathe. No planes.”
“It’s okay,” Pete said into the phone. His voice was low. Calming. “No planes. Can you drive? Are you up to driving? Windows down, long open roads, and no traffic. You can see the sky from horizon to horizon.”
“Yeah, I can do that,” he mumbled, relief swamping him.
“I’ll send you directions, okay?”
“Yeah.” He nodded, sucking in a breath a little easier this time.
“Phoenix, I need you to listen carefully,” Scottie said. “You can’t make it here in one go. It’s nearly a twenty-hour drive. We’ll send you a route that’ll take ya through Dubbo. There’s a small town a couple of hours past there. We can meet you there. We’ll book into the tourist park on the river and stop there for the night. Then we can do the rest tomorra, okay? We’ll all be here late arvo.”
No, he didn’t want that. He didn’t want to inconvenience them. It was a hell of a drive. “I’ll be okay on my own. You don’t need to drive out.” He paused, his chest loosening as he thought about the wide-open spaces Pete had sent him photos of. “Town past Dubbo tonight. Your place tomorrow. I can do that.”
*****
Phoenix pulled up at the homestead. It was like something out of a movie. An oasis in the desert. Red dirt surrounded him from horizon to horizon, broken only by the spindly blue-grey vegetation. The sky was the bluest of blues he’d ever seen. As if a filter had been applied to a photograph. It was unreal.
The familiar face jogging down the steps and around to his car was a welcome sight. Phoenix stumbled out of the front seat, almost falling flat as Pete caught him and wrapped him in a strong embrace. His hair was almost the same colour as the desert dirt, and Phoenix couldn’t help but smile. “Thank God you’re here,” Pete breathed. “I’ve been worried sick.”
“I’m okay,” he choked out.
“Bullshit. You’re anything but okay.” Pete pointed to the smaller building set a way away from the sprawling two-storey house. “You’re staying in the guesthouse. It’ll give you some privacy, but you’re expected for meals in the main house.”
“I can’t impose—”
“There isn’t any takeaway you can run out and grab out here. Trust me, you’ll need to eat, and Ma and Nan will be offended if you miss their cooking. They’re the coolest. They’ll help you. We all will.”
Phoenix tripped, the weight of the mess he’d made of his life making him stumble. Pete was there for him, propping him up and half dragging him into the little house.
He stepped over the threshold and looked around. Polished timber floors, white walls, and antiques that looked like they’d been handed down over generations were everywhere. “You need to freshen up, then get some sleep. Come on.” Pete led him by the hand into the bathroom with its old-fashioned shower pointing down into the clawfoot tub. He turned the water on, warming it, and getting a fresh towel out while Phoenix stood there, unable to move. Exhaustion warred with numbness. It had set in after the panic had subsided, and the hangover it left him with was hard to push through.
Pete turned to him and unbuttoned his shirt, making quick work of stripping him out of the material. “Let’s get you down to your underwear, okay?” Pete fell to his knees and unlaced his shoes, and for the first time, Phoenix noticed how dusty they were. Pete tapped his leg, and Phoenix braced himself on his friend’s shoulder, lifting his foot so Pete could take off his shoes and socks. He looked down at his friend and realized that the love he’d experienced for his friend was exactly that—friendship. He’d never been in love with him. It was a relief to finally understand. To know for sure. It buoyed him and gave Phoenix the strength to take over.
“It’s okay. I’ve got the rest.”
