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He shook his head, the smile falling from his lips. “Wasn’t quite good enough though, was it?” He sighed and Lij grumbled something unintelligible.
“That’s bullshit and you know it—” The line crackled, a buzzing noise drowning out Lij’s words before it went dead. Almost immediately it started ringing again and Liam answered.
“Yes, I know. It’s a team sport, we all get the credit when we win, so we should share the burden when it’s a loss,” he quipped, repeating the advice he’d heard more than once already.
“That would be true, if the loss was something that wasn’t so obviously your fault.” His dad’s words were like a sucker punch, stealing his breath and making Liam double over.
“D-Dad,” he stuttered. “I… I was just talking to Lij.” His explanation fell on deaf ears.
“You messed up tonight, son. I expected more. Your plays were sloppy and you weren’t fast enough.” His dad had thrown money his way to pay for the endless supply of equipment football players needed. He’d taxied him to and from practices and games, and even stayed to watch a few times. Liam hated that after everything his parents had done for him, he was a disappointment. He’d failed them. Again.
“I know, I let the team down,” he admitted quietly. “There are some things I can work on during the off-season that’ll put me in a better stead for next year.” He trusted his dad to say it how it was, something Liam couldn’t argue with, especially when it was true. He’d always been a disappointment to his family. Both his parents and sister had all wanted another girl—two princesses to take to dancing and gymnastics lessons. They thought they were getting one too, the scans all failing to show his tackle. But instead of their baby girl, they got stuck with a rough and tumble boy who lived for the game.
His dad added, “Good,” but Liam was lost in thought. He didn’t realize his father had hung up until he pulled the phone away from his ear a moment later. The cavern inside his chest expanded, swallowing him in the gaping void. The heavy weight pressed down on his shoulders and his stomach churned, bile threatening to come up.
When they arrived at the hotel, Liam begged off the team’s dinner, heading straight back to his room. He’d already let them down once that night. What difference did it make if it happened a second time? The sooner room service arrived, the sooner he could go to sleep and forget that this day ever happened.
*****
It was early when his phone vibrated with a notification. He checked the screen—an email to his student email address. Liam had been waiting for this one. His statistics mid-term results were posted. He sat up, the sheet pooling at his waist as he scratched his chest and gathered the courage to open the university app. He didn’t know if he could stomach two losses in less than twenty-four hours.
Nope, not right now.
Handling the phone like it was an unexploded ordinance, he gently placed it on the bedside table. He side-eyed it. The phone stared back at him, the black screen mocking him. Taunting him. It vibrated again and Liam jumped out of his skin. Another notification from the app.
“Dude, is that thing gonna keep going?” Taufa grumbled. His roommate had arrived sometime after Liam had crashed. He hadn’t even heard him come in.
“Sorry, mate.” More grumbling and the big back rower rolled over. Liam swiped the screen and bit his lip, praying to a god he didn’t believe in that he’d somehow pulled off a miracle. He’d studied hard for the one-hour in-class quiz. The other students had walked out early but he’d stayed until pens down. The others all said they were pleasantly surprised by how easy it turned out to be. Liam had struggled. He had no idea whether he’d done enough to pass. If he hadn’t, he had another repeat in his future.
He bit the bullet, opening the app and navigating to Introduction to Statistical Analysis. He held his breath. Shot out another pleading prayer. Clicked on the tab for his marks.
Seven out of forty-five.
It was dismal. He sighed and dropped the phone, scrubbing the grittiness from his eyes with the heel of his hands. What the hell was he going to do?
“Masters, seriously dude, shut the hell up,” Taufa huffed.
He needed to get out of there. Liam stumbled out of bed, heading straight to the bathroom. He shut the door a little too hard, ignoring the curse from his roommate, and turned on the shower. Without even waiting for it to warm, he stripped off and climbed in, the freezing drops like needles on his skin. Liam slid his arse down the tiled wall until he was sitting in the stall, his head hanging under the stream. Wrapping his arms around his knees, he resisted the urge to lash out, kicking at the glass closing him in.
After the loss of the game yesterday, the test results were a kick in the teeth.
Nine
Adelaide
A
delaide was quiet as she watched her mum potter around the kitchen. She’d needed an afternoon like this—some time with her mum. King would be over soon to have dinner with them, but until then, they were the only ones at home.
She adjusted the flowers on the table, turning the orange gerbera toward her. They were a gift from King, one of many he’d given her. Whether they were thoughtful presents that showed he cared, cute and silly ones, or romantic ones like the love notes he posted her, Adelaide constantly had a smile on her face.
“Did you sort out what you were arguing with King about?” her mum asked, always blunt and to the point.
“We weren’t arguing. He’s going to look for another job, but I don’t want him to do it.”
Her mum snapped her head around, the look on her face almost comical. Adelaide choked on the water she was drinking. “Why not?” her mum asked, her tone aghast. “You know I love King. I think he’s a wonderful man. He loves you in the way I dreamed you kids would experience love. But allowing this ridiculous notion that you’re some dirty secret to go on is awful. Why are you encouraging it?”
“King’s all in. I mean, I am too,” she answered, before blowing out a breath. She didn’t know what she was trying to say. She wanted to move her relationship with King forward, but she was holding herself back. It wasn’t King. After their second date, Adelaide knew she could fall for him. It hadn’t occurred to her that King’s school might have an issue with their relationship. He’d dropped a bombshell on her when he’d told her, but he'd come prepared with a solution too. He was ready to quit immediately and move to another school. But how could she agree to that? Her mum laid down the knife in her hand and rested her palms on the kitchen bench. “You’re going to need to explain the mental jump you need me to make there, Addy.” “King was ready to resign on the spot. But it’s too soon, isn’t it? What if we don’t work out? King said he’d be able to pick up a new position fairly easily, but why should he have to? If we split, it’ll all be for nothing. He would have uprooted his whole life, settle into a new school—one that he can’t guarantee he’ll even like—and for what?”
