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Adelaide
H
er phone rang, vibrating against her leg as she sipped her gin and blueberry cocktail with the other students at the bar they’d found hidden away in the alley. “Sorry, I need to take this,” she said, lifting her phone and standing up. “Hey, baby, how are you?” she answered. King’s breathing was ragged, as if he’d run a marathon. He didn’t say anything, and a spike of fear crushed her chest. “Let me get somewhere quieter and we can talk.”
She dashed up the alley away from the noise of the bar. It was just a hole in the wall with high-topped tables and chairs under a waterproof sail, but it was cute and hopping with people. They were out celebrating the completion of the second week of classes and their latest assignment. This time she’d facilitated a session where non-sexual touch was used to grow intimacy. But at that moment it was the last thing on her mind.
“Baby, what’s wrong? Talk to me,” she implored, ducking into a quiet doorway around the corner. She checked inside, making sure she wouldn’t be moved on, but the café had closed hours earlier.
“I’m sorry,” he sobbed. Adelaide’s breath caught in her throat, that crushing fear decimating her ability to inhale. “Fuck, why now?” King muttered and there was a clatter as if he’d thrown something.
“What happened, King?” she choked out.
“He tried to kiss me—Liam—and I wanted him to. I wanted him so bad. But I pushed him away. I told him no, but Addy, I wanted him and I’m so sorry.” His breath hitched on a sob and she could hear him sniffling.
It took a moment for his words to sink in. Liam had tried to kiss King. Shock stilled her movements, the nervous fiddling with the hemline of her singlet. Surely she hadn’t heard right. But that was what King had just said; Liam had tried to kiss him.
She bit back a sob as her heart shattered into a million pieces. She’d loved Liam forever, and he’d never paid her much more than a cursory glance. She’d always been Lij’s little sister. Now, she was his friend. At least she thought he was. Why would he do that? Why would he hurt her like that? Why now? Why, when she’d finally found someone who made her happy, did he decide he wanted to be with a man? Her man.
“Adds,” King whispered, his voice broken. Rough and absolutely destroyed. “I’m sorry.”
Oh, god, she was going to lose him.
Fuck. That. She was no victim. Adelaide lifted her chin, squared her shoulders, and stiffened her spine. She clenched her jaw. She wasn’t giving King up. She wasn’t stepping back. She wasn’t letting King go. He was meant to be hers; Adelaide knew it to her very soul.
So what now? Blind panic lashed out. She wanted to tell King no. Irrationality made her want to pull the plug on their tutoring. To keep them apart. But she couldn’t. It would destroy the very thing that she was trying to protect. King wasn’t a piece of fine art to be locked in a gilded cage. He was a living, breathing man, with feelings that ran as deep as oceans. Feelings that Adelaide knew would be destroyed by her losing faith in him. She’d be asking him to choose. To sacrifice a part of him she had no right to ask he give up. Yes, she was his girlfriend and yes, they were exclusive, but she’d just promised him a week earlier that his attraction to Liam was okay. It was healthy. She’d promised him that she could handle it if he wanted to take things further as long as she knew about it.
King had done exactly what she’d asked. He’d pushed Liam away and called her to talk.
But damn, did it hurt. Knowing she would never be what Liam wanted was a tough pill to swallow. Liam making a move on King was like the universe was taunting her. It was as if the stars were saying a giant fuck you to her. Giving her a peek of what happiness with King was, and teasing her with close-ups of what a relationship with Liam was like. The very men she was in love with wanted each other, but she would only ever be on the edge.
Talk about un-fucking-fair.
Adelaide regretted ever telling King it was okay to want Liam. Once upon a time she didn’t think either of them had a snowflake’s chance in hell with the man. Turned out she was wrong. But the more important question was whether she’d encouraged King because it was a hopeless fantasy for him as much as it was for her? What kind of person did it make her to even think it? A shitty one. Adelaide needed to decide whether it was just platitudes or if she meant it.
No. Maybe?
Adelaide had no doubt that she loved King enough to give this to him. But could she do it knowing it was with Liam? Or would seeing them together destroy her? What was the saying? Set them free, and if they come back, they’re yours? Who thought up something ridiculous like that? A maelstrom of confusion and hurt spun like a cat five hurricane inside her.
Adelaide trusted King. She loved him and had faith in him. So why was it so hard to summon that faith now? She closed her eyes, slumping against the wall. Tears wet her lashes, trailing down her cheeks until they dripped off her chin. Drip, drip, drip.
“King,” she whispered, her voice breaking on that one word. Crying harder, she voiced her fears, “I can’t lose you. I love you.”
“Shh, my love. You aren’t going to lose me. I love you.” King’s voice was rock steady. Strong despite the ragged sound of it.
“But you want Liam,” she uttered, giving words to the unasked request.
“No. Yes, but not at your expense. I told him no. I told him I can’t. I’m faithful to you, Adds. I love you and even though I’ve fallen for him too, I won’t ever cheat on you. No matter what, you’ll always be it for me. I love you, Adds.” Something settled in her. Hearing those words, King’s promise of fidelity, soothed her ragged heart. Her doubts, her insecurities were beaten back by the memory of those strong arms wrapping around her, and the rumble of his voice against her ear as she pressed her face to his chest. The strength of his beating heart.
The anvil sitting on her chest cracked, loosening its crushing weight on her. She could breathe again. Adelaide didn’t know why, but the path before her cleared. King needed this. Maybe Liam did too. Whatever the reason, something inside Adelaide nudged her to encourage King. She’d needed to hear his words, needed to know he loved her. But something deep down also told her that King and Liam were meant to be together too. Before she could chicken out, let fear get in the way, she whispered, “Go for it.”
“Go for what?” King asked, confusion lacing his tone.
“Liam. I want you to be with him—”
“Adds—”
“No, listen. I know we agreed to be exclusive, and I’m not changing my mind… well, not exactly. But something is telling me that you and Liam are supposed to be together too. I think you need to explore that. I don’t want to break up; I’m not walking away. I’m… okay with you and Liam being together as well as the two of us still dating. I’m not saying we’re over, go and be with him. I am saying that… I don’t even know how to explain it.” She dried her cheeks with the back of her hand and started again, trying to rearrange her jumbled thoughts into something coherent enough to make some kind of sense to King. “I’m in love with you, King. I’m not some martyr who’ll walk away from you and say go and be happy with him. I’ll fight for you, like some crazy stalker—”
