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The bathwater is warm, the oil swirling in it smelling divine. Carter’s healed enough for the heat not to hurt too badly. It’s mostly a relieving sensation as the lingering pain and tension in his muscles begins to melt away.
Carter watches sir carefully, his heart sinking as he realizes sir might not be joining him. He wants to beg, but he’s already been so bad the past few days, he doesn’t want to disappoint sir again. He wants to prove he can be good. Even if it means being lonely. His feelings don’t matter. All that matters is sir.
If sir has no desire to use him right now, then Carter has to just - Carter’s thoughts blank when he realizes sir is pushing his sweatpants down, revealing that he’s naked beneath them. His heart races as he watches sir’s tall, muscular body move towards him, sir’s cock half-hard as he eyes Carter up like Carter is his prey.
It should terrify Carter.
It doesn’t.
Carter attempts to move over to give sir some room as he climbs in, but once sir is seated and has turned the faucet off, he’s reaching over and moving Carter until Carter’s left leg is hitched over sir’s right one. He rests one of his arms across the lip of the tub behind Carter, his hand closing around Carter’s shoulder. Sir begins stroking his skin. Carter shivers and rests his head on sir’s chest, making him chuckle in a low, sexy way that sounds fond.
It’s not real, Carter. It’s not real.
“I’ve missed you,” sir whispers.
Carter’s world narrows, focusing down to nothing but those three words. His voice trembles when he asks, “Really, sir?”
“Really. It’s very lonely and boring without you.”
An awful thought comes to Carter. It catches him off guard, pouring out of his mouth before he can stop it. "Did you use other slaves, sir?"
Sir doesn't even hesitate. "No."
"But… they could have made you feel good, sir."
"I don't want them to be the ones making me feel good."
Carter's stomach flutters at that. He remembers sir's erection when he was getting into the tub. If sir has gone this long without release, Carter needs to step up. Sir's pleasure is Carter's sole purpose. He needs to show sir how seriously he takes that. He needs to show sir he was worth waiting for.
Slowly, Carter moves in the bath until he’s straddling sir. The water laps around them as he reaches down for sir’s cock. It’s barely hard, but Carter can fix that. He starts to stroke him in what he hopes isn’t too clumsy of a rhythm, planning to get him hard enough to put him in his ass. Carter isn’t prepped, but that doesn’t matter. All that matters is sir’s-
“No, sweetheart,” sir says softly, his hand encircling Carter’s wrist and gently pulling him away from his cock.
Carter whimpers. “Please, sir?”
“Why?” sir asks, sounding angry and frustrated and desperate to understand. “Why do you keep trying to get me off?”
“I’m sorry, sir,” Carter whispers as he hunches his shoulders and shrinks in on himself. “I just – I don’t know what else to do. It’s all that I am…”
“What’s all that you are?”
“Holes, sir.” Carter looks sir in the eyes, needing him to understand. Heshouldunderstand. He’s who taught Carter this in the first place. “I’m just holes. If you don’t want to – to use me anymore, then I’mnothing, sir. I’museless…”
Sir just stares at him, looking upset in a way Carter can’t place. It’s not anger or annoyance, but it’s not sadness either. Panic seizes Carter’s chest.
Oh god, what if sir doesn’t want him anymore?
Carter shakes his head, tears burning his eyes. “Sir,please. I don’t want to be nothing. I – I thought maybe… the other day, after everything, I thought maybe I wanted to, but I don’t. I don’t want to die, sir. Please. I can still be useful. I’m not nothing. My holes, they – they still work. Let me show you, sir. Let me p - prove to you that I’m not-”
“Shhh.” Sir has his eyes screwed shut, his forehead wrinkled. His hands tremble where they hold Carter’s hips. “Just –shhh. Okay?”
“Sorry, sir,” Carter frantically whispers. He scrambles off of him and hurries to the opposite side of the tub. Unable to stop the overwhelming emotions raging inside of him, Carter curls into a ball and buries his face in his hands. He grits his teeth so hard he’s worried they’ll break, but it muffles most of the broken sounds he can’t seem to stop, so it’s worth it. He doesn’t want to upset sir by being loud or annoying after the man specifically asked for silence.
Carter hears a choked, “Christ,” before water splashes and two arms wrap around him.
“I’m sorry, sir!” Carter cries, no longer able to keep himself quiet. He frantically clings to sir. “I’m sorry I c-can’t stop cry-crying. I keep messing up and – and being bad. I’m sorry for – I’m so b-bad!”
“Oh, Carter. Sweetheart.No.” Sir cradles Carter’s head against his chest with one hand and uses the other to rub his back in soothing circles as he slowly rocks him in the warm water. “Shhh. You’re so good, Carter. So good for me. You make me so happy, sweetheart.”
