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“Okay!” Junie rubbed her hands together. “Let’s get the drinks and the food going, then we’ll talk.”
I sat slightly apart, as usual. They were so beautiful. All so different, but oh, so beautiful in their own ways.
Not one of them could be called appropriately ladylike, though Willa and Amber probably came the closest. Mara was quietly hysterical, Junie obnoxiously so. Bex and Ruby, petite but oh so feisty, ready to take on the world at a moment’s notice, and they were here to take on the world for me. All of them. Even Bex and Mara, who I’d only really gotten to know over the past six months, were here to lend their support.
“Mara, how are you finding the girls?” I asked.
She brightened. “Good! The first time I went they were very quiet.” She blushed. “I did what you suggested and gave them a copy of my book. She cleared her throat. “They were much more relaxed around me the next time and we spent a great deal of time discussing certain parts.”
Amber laughed. “They are a really good group. Your name came up during one of our sessions. They really love you. And I’ll tell you, the journaling? They are loving it.”
“That makes me so happy,” Mara sighed.
“Bex?” I turned to Rebecca. “How did you find it?”
“Easy-peasy,” she replied. “I went in with Merry, piggy-backed on her success.”
I looked around. Seeing them here all together made me realize just how intertwined their lives had become with the shelter. One of my girls worked with Ruby. Amber ran group sessions. Willa had taught art lessons on many occasions. Now, Mara and Bex were going occasionally having jewelry-making parties and writing lessons. Even Yiayia went in and baked with them. And Junie, sweet Junie, had recently presented me with graphics and a social media plan to beef up our fundraising campaigns.
“So,” Junie began. “Think of this as a girl posse convention.”
“More like a pussy convention.” Ruby laughed.
“A Pussy Intervention, if you will,” Junie concluded.
Amber covered her face with her hands. “Here they go.”
Mara shrugged. “I like it. Pussy Intervention has a certain ring to it.”
“I agree,” Bex replied, then slapped her hands down on her thighs as she looked at me. “We are here to help you in any way we can.”
“We’re sorry if what we said about Lucky in the beginning led to any of this,” Willa interjected, pressing her lips together.
“You two belong together. Anyone can see that,” Junie agreed.
Amber and Ruby moved to bookend me, offering silent support.
“I think we’re going to be okay,” I began cautiously. “Willa, thank you for that picture. I love it. It holds a place of honor between my mother’s tea set and my dad’s art tools.”
Willa smiled, and I promised to show everyone later.
“The thing is, I have a…” My shoulders rose to hug my ears as the room closed in around me. Amber lay a gentle hand on my arm, and Ruby pressed her thigh against mine. “I have a disorder that fucks with my brain sometimes.”
“Hm,” Willa hummed, nodding her understanding.
“I have OCD.”
“It makes life difficult for you?” Mara asked quietly, her eyes soft with compassion.
“Not always.” I paused, then mentally shrugged and said, ‘fuck it’. My shoulders relaxed and I launched into my recitation. “OCD has many subtypes. Some people only suffer from one or two, some people suffer from all of them, some people cycle through them. As they conquer one set of symptoms, another pops up to take its place. I’m a cycler. I go through all of them. The two that have shamed me are sexual OCD and pedophilia OCD. I couldn’t handle the OCD assault that came from spending so much time around Brayleigh.”
I visibly shrunk away from their stunned gazes.
Junie jumped in. “I did some reading,” she began. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but sexual OCD tells you to fuck everything that moves, and pedophilia OCD makes sure that includes children.”
“Essentially,” I murmured. Heavy silence lay between us.
Someone cleared their throat. “I used to hallucinate when my PTSD was triggered.” Grateful for her confession, my head whipped up to find Willa’s thunder and lightning eyes steady on mine. “I still do sometimes.”
