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Vanessa tilts her head back. “Right now, we are both just trying to give her some space to deal with it. If she wants to go to her dads, I let her. We are still friends, and that’s the best thing we can do for our daughter. She is my priority.”
It’s nice to have someone talk about their kids in that manner, which just concretes the fact that she is a great mother. Some parents are selfish and put their own needs or wants above their kids, and that’s not how it should be.
“Sherrie is lucky to have you.”
Our eyes lock for a moment, and then we pretend to be doing something. Nothing is going to happen, but that means we don’t have this undeniable attraction. It’s almost hard to deny. I think about giving in, and just pulling her aside and confronting her about it, but I stop myself. She just got out of a relationship.
When she is ready, she will have any guy she wants. Her luscious lips, and beautiful eyes. There’s no doubt she will have an abundance of men asking her out.
Why do I want that guy to be me so badly?
11
VANESSA
A squirrel runs across the fence, and stops. It leans up on its hind legs and nibbles on its fingers, chittering. Sometimes, it’s nice to take in animals in their territory. The kids are laughing and squealing playing games in the pool. Normally, the party would be at Lee’s house, but I didn’t think it would be right to ask, and it’s no longer my house. The girls don’t mind, and I didn’t know if the backyard would provide enough space, but it’s adequate.
The charred scent of the barbecue envelopes around me, and I breathe it in. It reminds me of all the times my dad would grill when I was younger. Such good memories before our family went to shit.
Brodie is handling that while I keep an eye on the kids. We might have had a moment, but that’s over. He grew up with divorced parents, we share that in common and our love for sports. Maybe he isn’t so bad after all. I keep telling myself there must be something wrong with him, but I could be trying to keep myself at a safe distance.
Brodie steps over and nudges me with his shoulder. “You okay?”
There are so many things that are sloshing through my mind and having him this close isn’t helping. I want space, but at the same time, his arms would feel good around me. What is wrong with me? I’ve never felt this pull to someone before, and it scares the shit out of me.
“Just a lot on my mind. You can imagine. Just trying to get through this party,” I reply.
Why is it so hard to let someone in? Even as a friend? Tina always questioned why Lee and I didn’t get married, and maybe she is right. We have commitment issues. It’s not hard after both our parents went through painful divorces and spent our childhood fighting. It doesn’t exactly make me believe in a happy married life. Holy shit. I’m scared to end up like my parents.
“Can I ask you a personal question?”
He nods, pulling the hot dogs off the grill.
“Your parents being divorced, doesn’t it ever make you think that marriage isn’t worth it? Like there is no happily ever after?”
He turns to me, places his hands on my shoulders, and stares dead in my eye. “Sure, my parents hated each other, but that doesn’t mean my marriage will be like theirs. Don’t let them ruin your chances at being happy. There’s someone out there for you, and once you find him, he’ll make you believe in happily ever after's.”
Why didn’t I ever question this with Lee? We were together ten years and never got engaged. Yes, we were only together two years before we got pregnant with Sherrie, but we were already having problems. If we hadn't had Sherrie, we wouldn’t have stayed together this long. Is it possible I close myself to the possibility of really letting someone in?
Brodie tells the girls to get out of the pool and eat. He puts the hot dogs on the platter and places the condiments and buns on the long picnic table. The girls grab their towels and take their seats. With all the swimming they have been doing, I’m sure they have an appetite.
Brodie and I sit at opposite ends of the table, and I try not to glance at him. He had some of the same obstacles as a child, and surprisingly he has been a gentleman.
The girls start talking about the other teams, and how they think the season is going to go, and Brodie just watches and listens to them. Their confidence in themselves and the team is high and that’s a good thing. The team enjoys having Brodie as their coach, and as long as he keeps calm under pressure, this season should go wonderful.
The girls get back in the pool after eating, and I grab my phone.
Me: You still coming over?
Her offer to help is nice, but a part of me thinks it’s a way to give Aaron some space. I know he isn’t upset about her being pregnant, but there is a lot of things that he will need to change before it gets here. He might have to step back a bit on his career path, but that’s what you do for your kids. Tina doesn’t want him to give up anything, but he’s stubborn and will do it anyway.
The girls yell at us to join them, but I’m not wearing a bathing suit in front of him. Ten years ago, I wouldn’t have had a problem, but my body isn’t as toned as it used to be. Kids will do that to you. I shouldn’t care what he thinks, but I do.
Brodie walks up the ladder, and gets in. I am hoping he is going to take his t-shirt off, but nope. What a shame. Although, it’s probably more appropriate with the kids.
“Hey…” she says, coming out the door and stopping dead in her tracks. Her eyes land on Brodie in the pool, splashing the kids, and having a good time.
She walks down to me, and takes a seat. “Wow, he’s hotter than you described. If I was single, you’d better your ass, I would be under him so fast.”
