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“So, what are you thinking?” she asks, not looking up from the menu.
“You can never go wrong with steak. That’s my motto,” I say, closing my menu and ordering it medium-well.
She laughs at me. “You want it with no flavor? Live a little.” She turns to the waitress. “I’ll have the same, but medium-rare.”
The waitress laughs, and I change mine to appease Vanessa. I’ll try anything once.
“So, I have an honest question. Since we are talking about futures already. Where do you want to be in five years?” I only ask because even though I can’t take my eyes off of her, she needs to be going in the same direction as me. It’s important. Vanessa takes my hand on the table.
“Well, hopefully I’ll be sleeping next to you every night, but also in my own home. Oh, and Sherrie will have adapted to the change between Lee and I. She’s still struggling, and it kills me we are putting her through this.”
No mention of kids, and that’s huge for me. If Vanessa keeps me around, I’d love nothing more than to be a stepdad to Sherrie, but I’ve always dreamed of having at least two kids. Is she down to have another one? This isn’t something that I can budge on. No one should have to settle on things like this. Obviously it is different, if you get married and find out one of you can’t have kids, but that’s not the case here.
“Can we talk about kids a little more?”
She crinkles her nose. “I’m not opposed to having more, but don’t want to rush. Things need to be airtight between us to bring another kid into the mix.”
I think we can both agree on that note. After our childhood experience with growing up in separate households, neither of us want that for our children. The fact she is already dealing with this for Sherrie means it is in the forefront of her mind. The difference is from what I’ve gathered, her relationship with him had never been that great. I think showing her who I am, and giving her all the love and support she needs will help her see the difference. I’m father material, and as much as I don’t want my child to be raised separately, things happen.
I take a moment to just gaze into her eyes, taking in her beauty, and how strong she is. There are many women and men that stay in bad relationships because of children, and as much as I’d like to say that would never be me, I’ve never been in that situation. Sometimes, you don’t realize how bad a relationship was, until you find someone who gives you that instant spark and shows you what you deserve. I’m hoping that I am that person for Vanessa. Leaving Lee isn’t something she should ever regret.
The wine is good, but my stomach needs something substantial soon. The energy is draining from my body, and my blood sugar is crashing. I forgot to eat lunch before heading to the field, so I haven’t eaten anything since seven this morning.
“You’re pale, and quiet. Everything okay?” Vanessa asks, reaching across the table to tilt my face up to get a good look. “Do I need to take you to a hospital?”
I shake my head. “Just need to eat.”
The waitress walks over with our plates in tow, just in the nick of time. “Two steaks, both medium-rare. Can I get you anything else?”
We shake our heads, and I grab my knife, not wasting any time, and stick a piece of it in my mouth. Vanessa watches me as I shovel my sides into my mouth in between the steak.
“Slow down. You’re going to make yourself sicker.”
My energy level is coming back up, and I start to notice a shift. “I’m going to be fine. Just haven’t eaten since early this morning and didn’t even realize it until now.”
Vanessa continues to eat, but keeps her eye on me.
The fact she is worried about me is endearing, but we have too many things I’m looking forward to tonight, and if she thinks I’m under the weather, she might not want to come back to my place. That just won’t do.
25
VANESSA
Who forgets to eat? Especially, someone with his job? How dangerous. I keep my eye on him while he finishes eating.
“Maybe you need to set a reminder on your phone. Something to make sure you don’t do this again?” I suggest.
“It’s not like it happens all the time. Don’t worry about it. I’m fine now.”
The color in his face is back, and a smile sweeps across it. There’s the man I know. Maybe he’s right. He just needed to eat and get something in his stomach.
I lay my hand on his, while the other one is still maneuvering the final bites of his meal into his mouth. How the heck is he able to eat all of that? My plate is still half full and I don’t think I could put another bite in me.
“So, what are your plans after this?”
The fork clings against his plate, and he uses the napkin to wipe his mouth. “Dessert.” He puts his hand up in the air to get our waitress’ attention and she brings him the check.
I hope he knows that I am not the type of girl that needs fancy restaurants. Honestly, I would have been just as happy staying at home and cooking something for him.
