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Cara
When I wake up a few hours later, there's only one thought that comes to mind.
Jackson.
"Rose?" I groan, rubbing a hand down my face.
She looks up from my little bundled baby, and my heart skips a beat. I can't believe I made such a perfect human, and once again I promise that I'll give him the best life possible.
But first, I need to figure out what's going on with my child's father.
Shit, my child. I don't even have a name for him yet.
"I need to go see Jackson." I say, not able to peel my eyes off the baby.
She cringes. "I don't think it's a good idea."
"Why not?"
"Cara," Rose sighs, standing up to place the baby in his bed. "He's had a couple surgeries. He's not doing well."
"What do you mean? Is he going to make it?" I grip the sheets below me as I prepare to hear the worst.
She shakes her head. "No. I mean no, he's going to make it. He's not doing well… mentally. Physically, too, but mostly mentally."
"I don't know." She frowns.
"So, help me, Rose. I might have stitches in my stomach holding my insides together, but I'll walk there if I have to."
She sighs again, this time defeated. "I'll get the nurse." She walks out with worry in her eyes, and I lean back on the bed, finally feeling like I can breathe. I don't remember what happened to Jackson, not completely. But it can't be that bad, right?
Right?
When Rose comes back with a nurse trailing behind her, I wonder if maybe it really is that bad. Not only is the look on Rose's face concerning, but the nurse doesn't look too happy, either.
"Are you sure you're up for a visit? You've went through some traumatic experiences the last couple days. It's okay to just rest and heal. Jackson will still be there once you're feeling better." The nurse looks me over, probably looking for a reason to keep me here.
I push myself up, wincing through the pain. "No, I want to go see him. I want to see him now."
The nurse nods solemnly, which only heightens my panic.
Rose walks over to the baby bed and starts rolling it towards the door. "I just need you to know something." She blocks the door as she stares at me in the eyes. She looks worn and tired with Easton's hoodie on and a pair of leggings. I can't imagine I look much better, but she looks so unlike Rose that I feel bad for her. I haven't realized what an ordeal this must have been for her, too. Watching two of her closest friends bleed out in front of her. By the way she handles the baby, I'm assuming she's been taking care of him since he's been born.
I wonder how Easton is doing, and if he's in as rough of shape as she is.
"Cara, are you listening?" She snaps at me. I break out of my thoughts and lift my arms, gesturing for a hug.
"I love you." I sniffle. She tears up as she walks towards me, and I tuck my head into her shoulder. "I wouldn't be able to do any of this without you." She mumbles I love you, too as we squeeze each other.
A few moments later, she kisses me on the cheek and stands up, wiping her wet face and smiling at me. "What I wanted to say is that you should be prepared. Jackson doesn't look well. He's strapped up to a ton of machines and it looks kind of scary. That… and…" She wipes her eyes again, trying to hold in her cry.
"What is it?" Her figure turns blurry as I imagine the worst, again.
"He's not speaking. Not to me, not to Easton, not to the doctors. No one. He sits there silently as the doctors tell him he'll never walk again. In the beginning they even put him on a seventy-two hour hold in the psych ward. Easton got him out of there before he could get placed there permanently. He's back to his hospital room, but Cara, he's not well."
I think of Jackson, and how much our relationship has evolved over the last year. Since the moment we first slept together to every moment in between. It's been a rough ride for us, but each time we’ve been together has slowly brought us closer together. We made it official, but does he even want to be with me anymore?
I want to. I think about everything he's been through in life and how he's come out of his shell. With me. Not with anyone else, but slowly he's been able to talk to me about his past. He told me about his sister, something I'm sure he hasn't told anyone about. He trusted me with his darkest secrets, and I think it was then that I realized…
