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Robert sat down beside me and said, “That must have been one hell of a conversation that you two had.”
“Yes, it was…unexpected. But then again, I seem to find that anytime I speak to your family,” I said.
“You’re not the only one. It happens with all of us. We are very…unpredictable.”
I smiled. “I thought for sure you were going to say…different.”
“That word is solely used for us,” he said.
It wasn’t the word I’d have picked to define our relationship, but at least we had one. I would’ve liked something sweeter, tender, maybe loving. But that wasn’t us. Everything about us, since our very first kiss, was different. And it seems like that’s not going to change.
“I saw you talking with Ellen. How is she doing?” I asked.
“She’s putting on a strong front, but I can tell she’ll need you once everyone leaves.”
“I know. I’m sorry that we’re not getting much time alone lately,” I said. “I’m sure things will go back to normal soon.”
“Danielle, I’m not complaining. Actually, how much you care is one of the things I love about you.”
Did he just use the L word? He didn’t say he loved me, but something he loves about me. Is that the same thing? If we weren’t at the memorial service for Lori, I’d pull him aside and ask him right now. But not the place. And I know that tonight, I’ll be with Ellen so that won’t work either. How am I going to focus on anything else not knowing what the comment really meant?
Bet he’s thinking the same thing after Katherine’s comment too.
“Robert, I know we have things to talk about. Maybe we can set time aside tomorrow for just the two of us?”
“I’d like that. How about I cook you dinner?” he offered.
“You cook? I didn’t know that,” I said.
“I didn’t say I cook well. Trust me, it’s not going to be anything fancy. Most likely spaghetti and meatballs. If my restaurant was open, I’d do take out. But now you’re going to get jar sauce and meatballs that came frozen,” he said.
“If it means we have time alone, I’ll be happy with peanut butter and jelly toast,” I said, honestly. Leaning closer I whispered, “I really miss you.”
“I miss you too,” he said softly.
The yearning to be in his arms again was almost unbearable. I kept expecting him to come up with excuses as to why he couldn’t see me any longer just so he could be with someone who had more time for him. But he has not once made me feel guilty for anything and I loved him even more for that.
I do love you, Robert. I can’t wait till I can tell you. Show you. I hope I’m not wrong. I hope you love me too.
Before we could continue our conversation, several people came and sat with us. They were old school friends of mine and Lori’s.
“I can’t believe she’s gone,” one said.
Robert patted my hand and got up to give her the seat beside me. “I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said. “Call me if you need me.”
I nodded and watched as he walked away to join his siblings that were still here.
I always need you, Robert. But I must do this for Lori.
I turned to our old friends and listened to them reminisce about the good ole days.
