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She held up a gorgeous gold Dior gown. It was covered in tiny little diamonds that twinkled and sparkled when the fabric moved. It would fit me perfectly and hang long on my frame. It had scalloped straps and a gathered bust that would enhance my own breasts.
It would look good against my tanned skin and contrast with my long dark curls. As much as I felt like my hair should be shorter and pink or any other unnaturally dyed color, that would only serve to look garish with this dress. Natural was the best, and I was actually excited about the dance when I saw it.
“It’s gorgeous,” I exhaled slowly and took it from her. The ladies who had come with the racks of clothing set up on the first floor of our dorm building smiled and nodded, agreeing with me.
“It’s like it was made for you,” Grace said, and for once, she didn’t sound like a complete asshole saying it. Even she had to admit this was the dress for me.
“Okay, I think this is good,” I said, and I couldn’t keep the breathless anticipation out of my words. “I honestly never thought I’d find something.”
“And to think you were going to pull on some old horse blanket and call it couture,” Victoria giggled.
I took the dress and let two of the assistants help me dress. They zipped me up, and I stepped out from behind the privacy screen to the main area. There was one three-way mirror set up at the end of it, and I walked to check myself out.
I had to admit, I looked good. Better than good, I looked stunning. Even Victoria’s Lower sidekicks had to agree. Everybody was on board that this was the dress, so I decided to take it. The dance was the following day, and this would give me time to find shoes and decide on my makeup and hair.
“How do I pay for it?” I asked, draping the beautiful dress over my arm. “I don’t have cash, and I haven’t seen a credit card or anything.”
Victoria, Grace, and their minions burst into laughter, and I went from excitement to anger in about one second flat.
“It’s okay. We’ll charge it to your account,” one of the dress ladies said and patted my arm. “I know the excitement can get to be a little much, but you must remember how things work.”
“She hit her head, and she’s essentially a Lower now,” Victoria told the woman, and my cheeks burned in shame. “I mean, an uneducated Lower, not Lowers who know what they’re doing, like you lot.”
I shot her a nasty sidelong glance at her awful social faux pas and left the room with a flounce of my hair and a bounce in my step.
My anger and embarrassment had been very temporary. I was too excited about all of this to care at all.
* * *
“I don’t knowwhat I’m wearing,” Harlow said, exhaling a long puff of smoke. We were hiding out in the maze again, letting the hedges keep us from the judgemental eyes of all the Upper jerks I went to school with. It was hours before the dance, and I needed a break from the incessant crescendo of giggling and squeals in my dorm building. “I might throw on a plaid skirt and tall leather boots and go old school goth.”
“I wish I could pull that off,” I said. “I would love that.”
“I can’t imagine seeing you like that,” Harlow snorted. “I mean, it was bad enough when you wore your punk rocker Halloween costume the first day back at school. Remember that? I thought it was hilarious and badass. That’s the day I figured there was something different about you.”
“I thought Victoria was going to lose her mind,” I laughed. “Seriously, she acted like I was from another planet or something.”
“You still look uncomfortable in anything but the school uniform,” Harlow said. “You know you can request new clothing through the same service as the dresses. They come up to campus twice a month to give us a chance to shop. Not that I can afford anything, but it’s always fun to try clothes on.”
“I had no idea,” I replied and frowned. How much else was I missing out on because of the gaps in my memory. “I don’t know why we can shop online and have it delivered.”
“Shop online?” she laughed a loud bark. “That’s crazy. How would you know how it fit?”
I had an answer, but it flitted away before I could grasp it and hang onto it. These days with the increased medication, that happened a lot. At first, it distressed me, losing the dreams I had from my time in the coma, but now it calmed me. It felt less and less like I was living the wrong life and more like I was exactly where I belonged.
I no longer had one foot in the dark and one in the light. I existed where I was meant to be.
“I don’t know,” I said. “It just seems like a good idea, like how we can send a document to the printer so we can submit it to our teachers. Imagine if we could use the same internet to connect to stores.”
“It’s a cool concept,” Harlow said and pondered it for a moment. “I wonder if it could work. If I turn this idea into a business, you can have half the profits.”
She laughed at the last sentence, but I reached out, grabbed her cigarette, and took a long drag on it. As I exhaled and handed it back, I said, “No way. You keep every penny, I already have too much money, and it just controls my life.”
She shook her head like I was crazy and kept talking about my idea. I hoped she could do something about it. It seemed like the only way out of a shitty life for a Lower woman was to earn her own money or marry rich. And Harlow wasn’t doing anything to fall into the cookie-cutter shape of an Upper wife, so her only escape would be making money. Otherwise, it would be a life of drudgery for her, either cleaning people’s toilets or their wounds, depending on which direction she was pushed.
I didn’t know how Lowers lived outside of Crimson or our Upper circle, but from what I understood in the rumors and whispers, it was a hard, horrible life. I didn’t want that for Harlow, either. She was my only true friend here, and I wished I could save her from the future.
She finished her cigarette and dabbed it out on the stone pathway at our feet. She picked it up and put it back inside her pack. She was always careful so she didn’t accidentally burn the whole place down, as she’d say.
