Page 19 of Wishful Cowboy


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“Well what?” Slate asked. “I swear, when you do stuff like that, it drives me insane.”

Dallas only grinned at him. “I know it does.”

“Tell the man what to do,” Slate said.

“Yeah,” Luke said. “Tell me what to do.”

“I’m not going to do that,” Dallas said. “If it goes wrong, then I’m in trouble.”

“You won’t be in trouble,” Luke said, the desperation starting to build behind his lungs. He’d felt like this in a few fights too, as he got knocked back against the ropes or buried in the corner. He’d put his head down and punch, jab, and basically flail his way back to the center of the ring.

He couldn’t do that here, though he had gone on the offensive with Hannah today. “Oh, holy stars in heaven. I went on the offensive.” He looked between Dallas and Slate.

Dallas lifted his pizza and pointed it at Luke, nodding. “That you did.”

Luke groaned. “When will I learn?” In prison, he’d had to specifically coach himself to keep his cool. He’d gone off the rails the first night, and that was how he’d met Nathaniel Mulbury in the first place. Ted, Dallas, and Slate stood right behind him, and they’d rescued Luke from himself. Literally. It certainly looked like that wasn’t going to stop anytime soon.

“Hey, going on the offensive with a woman isn’t all bad,” Slate said. “You didn’t slug her.”

Luke had stepped closer to her, though. She hadn’t backed away from him either, and his heart thumped in his chest. He shook his head. “It doesn’t matter. I laid it on the line. I can’t take it back.”

“Hey, I held Jill’s hand pretty early on,” Slate said with a smile. “We all lay it on the line at some point.”

“You did?” Dallas asked, and Slate let the two of them talk about Dallas and Jess’s wedding and how the romance between Slate and Jill had started very quickly, accelerated quickly, and they’d be married quickly too.

Only a four-month engagement, and then Luke would lose his best friend.

Losewasn’t the right word, but things changed when a man got married. Luke had seen it enough times to know.

“Just see how she is tomorrow,” Slate said. “Don’t worry too much. Hannah is a really smart woman, and smart people get wrapped up in their own thoughts sometimes.”

“He’s right,” Dallas said. “Give her some time. Maybe she…I don’t know. I have no idea how women think.”

That got all three of them laughing, and that alone helped Luke feel better about his behavior from that morning. He still didn’t have a solution for what to do about Hannah, but maybe he didn’t need to come at the relationship swinging with everything he had.

Maybe he should just put his gloves up and wait for her to make the next move.

* * *

Hannah didn’t makea move the next day, or any day that week. Luke got up in the morning. He showered and shaved, though he’d started growing out his beard again. It seemed to grow better in Texas than Vegas, and Luke liked the more rugged look it gave him. He felt more like a cowboy. He just had to get past the itchy stage, and he was nearly there.

Spencer or Nick made breakfast every morning, and Luke wasn’t going to say no to a hot breakfast. He always came back to the Annex for lunch, for the air conditioning, and to take a quick nap. On Friday, he’d actually eaten his sandwich in bed he was so tired.

He’d definitely forgotten how much energy and exertion it took to build something. He’d forgotten the strength of the sun beating down on him all the time and the wind whipping up from time to time.

All of that, combined with the constant tiptoeing around Hannah, and he definitely needed a lunchtime siesta at the end of the week.

That evening, he ignored his phone and stayed in his room. He didn’t want to be pitied, and he certainly didn’t want to see Hannah’s boyfriend come and pick her up for a Friday night date. He couldn’t think of anything worse, actually, and Luke found himself five days into his life back in Texas wondering if he’d made the right decision or not.

He wished someone would just tell him what to do with his life.

“You know what to do with your life,” he said to himself as something played on the streaming service on his tablet. “This.” He got up and paced in the bedroom. “This is where you’re supposed to be. You know it. You canfeelit.”

Before prison, Luke hadn’t paid much attention to his feelings. He couldn’t even remember having feelings. There was the high of working out and the pain in his muscles. There was the discomfort of hunger and the buzz of the steroids. He’d experienced anxiety on the steroids, and anxiety when he stopped taking them too.

And oh, the anger. The anger Luke actually liked. He knew how to manage the anger. He knew how much he could take, and it was always another punch, another punch, another punch.

Every blow made him stronger, and angrier, and a stronger, angrier Luke won boxing matches. Winning boxing matches made money, and Luke needed the money to keep training and keep taking the drugs.

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