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She wanted to find a handsome man who wouldn’t freak out when she sobbed over a bad travel day.Who’d take her to a great local seafood restaurant and then walk with her on the beach.She wanted the ice cream, the soda pop, the lunches, and the man to come running when she needed help.
Right now, the only thing that came running when it needed something was her cat, and even then, it was to be let out so Chloe could torment the birds who dared to land in her trees.
She swallowed and reached to turn off her video.Then she wouldn’t have to hide her true feelings, and they could show on her face and no one would see.
“…he was asking me out,” Bea said, but Lauren had missed the first part of the sentence.
Someone at the door, she messaged to the chat box, and then she got up and left the computer with the video call still going.Cass’s voice came through the loudest, of course.Even though Lauren did go all the way to her front door, she still heard Cass give Grant six points, and she scoffed quietly enough to the window that showed a great view of her porch.
Lauren had packages to bring in, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it.She didn’t have time to shop in person, so she did everything online, and she loved having what she needed show up at the door while she put together winning sales packages and amazing marketing campaigns.
“Six points,” she grumbled.Not crying, ice cream, soda pop, being on time, taking Bea to dinner, coming over when called, and not making a big deal out of Bea picking the lock on the utilities closet.By Lauren’s count, that was seven points, but she wasn’t at the computer to argue with Cass.
She headed back, because it wouldn’t take long for her to answer the door and return, and she listened with her video off as Bessie said, “So.Bea.What are you going to do?”
“I don’t know,” she said.“Lunch would’ve been fun, but he got called to another property before I could answer.”
“You have his number now,” Cass said.“You text him and ask about lunch tomorrow.”
“It feels odd to go to lunch when you’ve already gone to dinner,” Sage said.“Isn’t that a step backward?”
“Of course it isn’t,” Cass said.“It’s all time spent together.”
“He’s busy,” Bea said.
“I say text him,” Joy said.“Lauren, are you back?”
“Yeah,” she said, clearing her throat.“I say text him, too.”She made no move to turn on her video, and her phone chimed a moment later.She looked at it, but she knew who she’d find there.
Bea.
I’m sorry, she said and nothing else.She didn’t have to specify what she was sorry about.
She was sorry this conversation was hard for Lauren.She was probably sorry she’d met a man when Lauren so desperately wanted the same thing.She was sorry she wasn’t there to hug her.Sorry, sorry,sorry.
She thought of Robert, and lately, she’d been imagining how different her life would be today if she’d accepted his proposal twenty years ago.Everythingwould be different, she knew, as she hadn’t quite finished college yet, and he’d been in the military.They’d probably have moved all over the world by now, and she wouldn’t even know any of the ladies on the call with her that evening.
Everything in her life spiraled then, and she wanted to scream as Cass’s voice said, “All right, so it’s decided.Bea is going to text him and ask him about tomorrow.Lunch, dinner, something.”
“And if that doesn’t work,” Sage said.“She’s going to sabotage the dishwasher.”
The group of them laughed, but Lauren couldn’t find her ha-ha-has.She ended the call, the guilt over doing so rising up and punching her with tiny fists at the back of her eyes.She put her head down and pressed her closed eyes to her hands, wondering why she was such an awful person.
A terrible friend too.
The call must not have gone on for much longer, because Joy called only ten minutes later.If she didn’t answer, then Joy would know she’d hung up on purpose.So she swiped on the call with, “Something blipped over here.”
“Yeah,” Joy said.“We lost you.”
“Did I miss anything?”
“She just went over and over what to text him,” Joy said, plenty of motherly love in her voice.She wasn’t as old as Lauren or Bea, but she definitely possessed some nurturing qualities and had always played that role in the group.“Do you have time for lunch tomorrow?”Joy cleared her throat.“I have an update about Wendell.”
Lauren’s heart beat faster for three pulses, and then settled down again.“Joy,” she said, the single syllable scratching her throat.“Name the time and place, and I’ll be there.”
“No meetings?”
“Not until Thursday.”
