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I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think, couldn’t move.
But I wanted to soothe his demons, needed what was coming maybe just as much as he seemed to.
As he drew near, I smelled the peppermint on his breath that enticed me in ways I didn’t even want to try and understand. Then mere inches from my lips he whispered again.
“Babe, tell me it’s okay to kiss you.” Heat radiated off his body, soaking me in its warmth, and those damn blue eyes swirled with an intensity I couldn’t deny. But I also wasn’t able to speak.
Throat clogged with a bundle of nerves, mixed emotions about whether I’d be doing the right thing by giving him the green light, all I could do was nod. Gyth wasn’t taking a simple dip of my chin for an answer though.
“Say it, Summer, give me your words.” Not budging, he waited for a second and that’s all it took.
“Please.” That one word was all it took before his mouth sealed across mine. My own fireworks erupted in my head, as stars danced behind my lids that had closed on impact, and my body was on fire as his sweet, but manly taste exploded in my mouth.
I was lost. But at least I’d been lost in heaven.
My response was inevitable and I sunk my tongue deep into his mouth, dueling with him and letting the passion take over. Much to my dismay, Gyth pulled back first, both our breathing uneven and rapid as my eyes blinked open and we stared at each other again.
“Happy New Year, Sunshine. Everyone deserves a kiss at midnight, I’m glad mine was with you,” he said softly as he swept a lone strand of hair behind my ear that had fallen across my face. Resting his hand at the back of my neck, his touch both soothed me and scared me to death.
Nothing, I had no words and all I could do at that moment was lay my head on his shoulder, as I took a deep breath, and shut my lids. That was the last thing I remember until hours later, when ungodly sounds and tormented moans pierced my ears, waking me from a dead sleep.
What in the world is happening?
Startled to hell, and confused about the noises coming from the man whose lap my head was laying in as his body jerked with rapid movement side to side, twisting and turning, my eyes almost bulged out of their sockets, and I lunged off the couch to my feet.
Never in my life had I heard anything like this, and I worked in a hospital in the ER. Standing next to the couch, I peered down at Gyth, who I now realized was in the middle of a nightmare. One that I knew was painful, and I felt every second of it as he shouted out to what I assumed could only be his fellow soldiers that he had served with.
As I started to lean over hoping I could soothe him and get him to wake up, I realized I was about to make a monumental mistake. From his words and actions, it was clear he was suffering from a PTSD-driven nightmare and the last thing I should probably do was get in his personal space and touch him right then.
Even if the pull to do so was strong.
It then dawned on me what had happened earlier when the fireworks and all the noises were happening outside. The sounds must have also put him back into a time he’d like to forget.
I wasn’t equipped in dealing with something like this and had never experienced a situation like this before, but I knew somehow, he needed to wake up. He needed to stop reliving the torture that was clear he had not only been through but obviously couldn’t forget.
“Gyth, wake up, it’s Summer. Can you hear me?” I shouted trying to gain his attention and rouse him from the misery-induced hell and heartbreak that he was experiencing as if he was right there trapped in the moment once again.
Nothing, it hadn’t helped a lick. Panicking a little because it had broken my heart to hear him suffering and yelling out names, screaming out orders, and to see the agony etched on his face, I felt helpless.
Something I seem to be feeling a lot these days.
Touching the screen on my phone so it would light up, I looked down to see it was three in the morning. Everything had quieted down outside, and it was just me and Gyth, he was all I had right then.
I was really worked up, and it was essential that I calm down, but seeing this beautiful, caring man in front of me like this was killing me. So I pulled in a gulp of much-needed air, as tears streamed down my face and I tried again.
This time, as I swiped frantically at the salty drops falling down my cheeks faster than I could make them disappear, reminding me of a set of windshield wipers that couldn’t keep up fast enough to clear the rain on one's windshield, I gentled my tone as much as possible and spoke to Gyth again.
“Gyth, you need-d to wake up. Can you-u wake up for me, please-e?” I pleaded, my words coming out shaky.
Surprised when his eyes that were usually a calm blue, but were now dark with a storm brewing in them, almost black as night, popped open and gazed at me blankly, I jumped back, my hand flying to my chest.
“Summer?” He stared at me in confusion as he shook his head a little as if trying to clear the cobwebs. He was covered in a sheen of sweat and looked as if he was about to come out of his skin, shaking furiously.
I just stood there, not able to control the tears of heartbreak that dripped down my face, and soaked my yellow tank top.
Not sure how many minutes had passed, he slowly came around and his amazing eyes started to clear as if the storm had started to pass.
“What’s wrong, why are you crying, Sunshine?”
