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Reaching out a hand, Landon’s palm touched my face.
“You are not alone, Alley. We are doing this together.” His thumb brushed over my cheek softly and as much as I tried to ignore it, the feel of him made me lean into his touch as I closed my eyes.
Together, is that even possible?
ChapterEleven
LANDON
LeavingAlley after I just got her back was damn hard, but it wouldn’t be for long. Just enough time to grab some of my things. Then I’d get back to her whether she liked it or not.
She was going to fight it, but Alley was officiallymine. I would do everything under the sun to keep it that way too. My girl would just have to get used to sharing her space with me.
I was her husband after all.
ChapterTwelve
ALLEY
The soundof the door shutting both relieved and scared me.
I’d asked for space, and I needed it, but at the same time when I heard Landon walk out of the house, it brought back memories of a few years ago when he’d left. Something that had been my own doing, not what he’d wanted at all, but I hadn’t listened because my grief was consuming me. I had lost faith in us and myself.
Now that I was home, I wasn’t afraid of the jackasses who had sent the letters, thinking about that just pissed me off. What had me terrified even though I pushed and shoved Landon out of my life, was that this time he may just listen for good.
God, I am a mess.
I shouldn’t even want him to come back because I didn’t see a way to work through our past. I couldn’t forgive myself for the things that happened. How could I believe we could have a second chance? Yet, I craved him like a woman did chocolate when she was PMS’ing. Although, he may taste better than chocolate and be more addicting.
And just like that, a vision of me taking Landon into my mouth last night flashed in front of my eyes. I could practically taste his warm, salty, slightly sweet fluid on my lips as the memories of his cock slipping past my lips took over. A moan escaped me and I squeezed my legs together to curb the sensation that zinged through my girly parts.
“Hello,” a sweet voice rang out, echoing down the hall.
Well shit, I didn’t hear the door that time. Shaking off the sexual bliss I had been recalling and jumping off my bed where I had been laying across my fluffy, solid black duvet cover, I threw my deep red pillows back where they belonged and walked out of my room, almost plowing into Summer and Jurnee both.
It looked as if my time hiding had finally reached its destination—the end. I knew they were no longer going to graciously let me keep to myself like they had for many years, and although I was nervous, I hoped confessing would relieve some of the guilt over holding so much back from two of the most important people in my life.
“What are you guys doing here? You just saw me, couldn’t get enough huh?” I loved to joke, and it also took the heat off the serious shit. Everyone knew I wasn’t one for the mushy crap and talking about my feelings any more than I had to.
Grabbing my hand and pulling me back down the hall to the front room, the girls didn’t say anything as they sat me down on the couch and followed, one on each side.
A little uncomfortable and needing to stall, I asked, “Is this one of those interventions?” Smiling awkwardly, I looked at Jurnee and then swung my gaze to Summer. She didn’t beat around the bush, so I guessed playtime was over.
“Why didn’t you ever just tell me how you felt about my brother? I think Jurnee and I both knew in a sense, but now we both agree it goes well beyond what we thought.” She raised her eyebrows waiting for a response, her voice sounding a little hurt... or maybe mad. I couldn’t exactly tell which. And I didn’t even know what to say or where to start.
Letting my gaze leave Summer’s, I looked back at Jurnee. Both my girls were amazing, but Jurnee had this softness about her that helped me relax. “Honey, we’re not mad, just concerned,” she started softly. “And we know you like your privacy so we gave it to you, but when you left today it was clear you needed us whether you believe that or not.”
This was going to be so hard, but Jurnee was right, I needed my friends desperately right now. And so, without any finesse at all, I blurted, “I was pregnant.”
The moment the words were out, that undeniable heartache hit me, and pain sliced through my body. My baby was gone. I couldn’t bring her back and it was my choices and my body that killed her.
Jurnee and Summer gasped. Everything that I had to say made me feel a bit unhinged, so I stood to face them together. The look they had on their faces, the one that said they felt sorry for me, was expected.
It was just one I didn’t deserve.
Swallowing the lump that was forming in my throat, I leaned my head back and took a deep breath in, fighting for the strength to carry on. When my head came back down, I squared my shoulders and started talking once again.
“Nothing happened with me and Landon until I turned twenty, but I think it had been brewing for a couple of years before that. Your brother”—I looked at Summer—“he had been like a brother to me also since the first night I met him but the bond we shared was also unique.”
