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“Dude, get your dumbass away from my sister and go do some work,” my brother said to him playfully. These two and Gyth could banter just like the girls and me. It was hilarious to watch and great they had that kind of bond.
Next thing I knew Kace leaned in and planted a kiss on my cheek. The man was a big old flirt and liked to rub it in if it would make someone a little crazy. He smirked at my brother and then walked off down the hall toward the front. No doubt to probably tease Gemma or something.
As I turned back to my brother after watching him walk away, I saw a scowl on my brother’s face. “That guy is a pain in my ass,” he told me.
Laughter burst out of me, and it felt good. It had given me a little relief before the conversation I was about to have. “And yet he is one of your best friends.”
Braxton just let out an exaggerated huff in response as I moved further into his office and plopped down into the chair on the opposite side of his desk.
“What brings you by, sis?”
Shit, here we go.
Taking in a deep breath and the worried look on my brother's face, I began. “First I just want you to know I am sorry I didn’t tell you about Landon and me. Keeping that a secret from you was wrong, but I had my reasons and as I said before, Landon went along with that for me.”
We had talked about that, so my brother just nodded.
“Growing up you were the only one for so long that had my back, and when you went away, I was so glad to have the girls because it was so damn hard with you gone.” Braxton started to say something, but I butted in. I wanted to get this all out and I also didn’t want him feeling bad. “Let me finish first, please.”
Again, he gave me another nod.
“You know as well as I do how it was in that house with our parents.” Shaking my head in disgust when I thought of them, I carried on. “I was worried about you and didn’t want you stressed about what was going on at home. I just wanted you to be safe and come home to me, but I didn’t want you to be ashamed of me ever either, so I kept things from you.” A tear trickled down my cheek at the thought of ever losing my brother then or even now.
Braxton was up out of his chair and rounding his desk, unable to stay quiet any longer. “Sis,” he said as he parked his butt on the edge of the desk right in front of me and looked me in the eye. “I am home safe, and I could never be ashamed of you. You are one of the strongest women I know and you are my family. Our parents are not even in our lives anymore and that is how we both want it, but you and me,” he said, pointing from himself then to me, “We will always be family and nothing you say will ever change that.”
I was so stupid for ever thinking Braxton would be any different than he was being right then, but I still hadn’t finished everything.
Swiping the single tear that had fallen, I started talking again, this time explaining first about how Landon and my relationship had evolved and about the country club incident. And, about my Hannah Nicole.
My heart beat triple time as once again memories of the past flooded my soul and broke another piece of me inside. This was why I bottled it all up and kept it sealed, so I wouldn’t hurt so much, but in the long run, a part of me stopped living, trusting, and thriving. I was beginning to see that over the last few weeks, but it didn’t mean I knew how to deal with any of it.
I had my head bent staring at my twisted hands as I told my brother the last part about his niece that he never knew about, and when I looked back up as I finished and saw the tears in his eyes, it took everything in me to hold it together.
Braxton took a big gulp of air and swallowed hard, he then cleared his throat to talk. “For starters, I have to say, you my sister are blind, because even if I am a little ticked still at Landon, one thing I know is that man never gave one lick about status, money, or any of those rich girls that hung on him all the time, or his mother tried to thrust into his life.”
I am not blind since I knew that too, just stupid for doubting what I had always known.
Next thing I knew Braxton stood, grabbed both my hands and dragged me to my feet. Looking me in the eye he said, “I’m so fucking sorry you had to go through losing your baby.” He squeezed my hands in his and pulled me in for a big hug.
Breathing in and out, I let the warmth of my big brother surround me and help make me feel better just like it did when I was a little girl.
When he let go and moved back a little to look at me again, he continued. “I can’t imagine the way you or Landon felt. Having two children of my own that I love more than life itself, it is beyond imaginable. But honey, I am going to be honest. You and Landon should have been there for each other. And who did Landon have after?”
The last part of what he said was like cold water splashed in my face. I knew he had his sister, but she was one of my best friends, whom I lived with. We may not have told anyone, but with the girls and Braxton, I was always surrounded by love. But Landon…
What did I do?
For two years Landon kept my secrets, let me treat him awful or ignore him, all while he was maybe more miserable than me. Why?
It was like my brother could hear my thoughts and saw the light bulb go off.
“Because he loves you,” he said flat out.
I sucked in a deep breath. “He loves me,” I echoed. “And still does.”
“I should have seen the way he looked at you when I had come home on leave and known. I was stupid. I noticed it the other day when you guys came home from Vegas but didn’t want to accept it then. The man is head over heels for you, little sis.”
He gave me a look like ‘what are you going to do about it’, and I panicked.
