AllFreeNovel
Share Us
TWO
"No stupid virus is going to keep us from having the holiday of a lifetime."
Alethea winced. "But Mum, the stories we're hearing here about all the sick people in Italy..."
"That's why I persuaded your mum to stay in France for a bit longer. We've found a lovely town with a weekly farmer's market, and one of the lovely snail farmers was willing to let us park our motorhome on her farm for as long as we like. You should see the view across the hills from here. It's just..."
"Lovely?" Mum interrupted, pushing her way in front of the camera next to Dad.
Alethea had to smile. Dad had never been good at superlatives. If she asked him what snails tasted like, he'd probably say they were lovely, too.
"There is talk that they might close the borders, though, and you won't be able to fly home." She didn't want them to come home early – they'd been planning to drive around Europe for years – but the Premier had been adamant that if West Australians wanted to come home, they had to come home now.
"I'm sure they'll be open by Christmas, which is when we'd planned to come home anyway. If it takes any longer, I can always find a job. Everyone needs nurses," Mum said. Her eyes narrowed. "Are you taking proper care of my orchids?"
"Yes, Mum. Watering them only once a week, and just the right amount of sun." There was a whole page of instructions, and she'd been following them religiously. And here she'd thought housesitting for her parents would be easy, seeing as they didn't have any pets.
"And what about your new year's resolution? Any progress?" Mum prodded.
Alethea sighed. Dealing with delicate orchids was much easier than actually achieving her resolution this year. She probably should have said she'd lose weight or something. Anything would be easier than...
"Because you actually have to go looking for love if you want to find it, sweetheart. Go out to places where you'll meet new people. Then go on dates."
Another sigh escaped. "I want to, Mum, but we're working on a really exciting dig at work and when we're done for the day, all I want to do is shower off the dirt and fall into bed. I mean, it's the first time anyone's done this kind of investigation on a colonial era cemetery before, and some of the stuff we're finding, it's just..." Highly confidential, so confidential the land owner had made them sign all sorts of non-disclosure agreements so they wouldn't share their findings with anyone. "Really exciting," she finished.
"Are there any men your age at the dig site?" Mum demanded.
"Yeah, but...all the exciting ones are dead, Mum." Or already taken.
"Next time I call, I want to hear you've been on a date. An actual date, Alethea Caroline Bell. And I want to hear all the gory details."
Dad paled. "Maybe not all the gory details."
Mum smacked him and he disappeared from view. "Yes, all the gory details. I'm a nurse. Well, a retired one. I saw every kind of gory there is before my meal break, and then saw it all again on the second half of each and every shift. I want to know if he...what does your cousin Callie call it? Oh that's right. If he gives good dick."
Anguished howling from Dad in the background. Alethea wanted to make the same sounds.
"Mum, Callie only says that to shock people. I'm sure she's never actually said it to someone who's equipped with..." Oh hell, now she was blushing.
"A penis?" Mum finished for her.
No, she was not going to talk about her sex life with her mother. Even if they were video calling her from France, while she hunkered down in their East Perth apartment. "Mum!"
"All right, all right. I'm sure you'll use your good judgement, like you usually do. I mean, you're not Tacey."
"Mum, Tacey's the most responsible out of all of us. As a single mum, she kind of has to be. And she's a business owner..."
"Yeah, but..."
"All right, Mum, I'll do my best not to make the same mistake Tacey did. I won't sleep with an abusive arsehole who'll try to kill me, and I'll make sure to use two condoms, in case one breaks. Happy?"
Mum frowned. "You know what I mean. You're just starting your PhD project. You don't want to mess things up and never finish. Do you know how many people never finish?"
No, and she didn't care, because she wasn't going to be one of them. This cemetery dig was going to give her all the material she needed for her PhD project and a whole bunch of papers.
"Honey, we have to go. Claudine said she's ready to take us on a tour of the farm now," Dad said, tugging at Mum's arm.
Mum wagged her finger at the screen. "A date, Alethea. Promise me you'll go on a date."
"Yes, Mum."
A flurry of goodbyes ended the call, and Alethea's screen went dark. She closed her laptop.
At least she hadn't had to make any promises involving penises.
