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“Why?” Sadie takes a seat across from me, pulling her legs up and wrapping her arms around them. She’s dressed in sweatpants and an oversized sweatshirt from Princeton’s own shop. With her hair pulled back into a messy ponytail. I feel bad ruining her time off from classes, but I desperately need her.
I let out a breath, cheeks puffing. “I don’t know. I learned some things about his past—with Blair—and I just couldn’t leave it alone.”
Sadie groaned. “So, let me guess. He got pissed.” At my sheepish expression, she rolled her eyes. “I knew this would happen. Why couldn’t you just leave it alone?”
“You know why I couldn’t.” I picked at a loose thread on the couch cushion, avoiding her gaze. “I just wanted to know who he was. Before I married him.”
“This is insane,” Sadie mutters. Her feet drop to the floor. “If you don’t want to marry him, then don’t. I’m sure my parents can help your father with whatever trouble he’s gotten himself into. This is archaic.”
“They can’t,” I reply quickly. Sadie shoots me a look. “Thanks for the offer, but they won’t be able to help.”
Sadie chews on her bottom lip, thinking. “So, how badly did you piss him off?”
“Enough.”
“Jesus, Cara.”
“I have a right to know,” I argue. “If I’m going to be tied to him, then I need to know these things.”
“Maybe his bank account or what he does for a living, but not his exes,” Sadie points out.
I sigh, leaning back until I’m staring at her ceiling. “His ex cheated on him.”
“What?”
“With his brother.”
She’s silent for so long that I thought she had walked off until I glance over and find her staring at me. “Killian got cheated on…with his own brother?”
“Yeah. Something Blair definitely hadn’t told me when she’d given me her sob story.”
“Holy shit. That had to hurt.”
“It clearly bothers him more than he’d ever admit,” I tell her honestly. “He doesn’t want me digging up his past with her. Or any of his past, for that matter.”
“Well, with something like that, I wouldn’t want you to either,” Sadie replies gently. “I mean, would you?”
I think about it for a second, already knowing the answer. “No,” I say finally. “I wouldn’t.”
“Look, Cara.” She leans forward, elbows resting on her knees. “If he went through something that traumatic and was betrayed like that—he’s not going to take this as you just wanting to learn about him. He’s going to see it as a complete invasion of his privacy.”
I bristle a bit. “It’s not like I’m finding out some big dark secret of his.” Though he probably has more than a few skeletons in his closet now that I think about it.
“No, but you’re picking at a wound that might not have entirely scabbed over just yet.”
“You think he still cares for Blair?” I ask incredulously. Killian gave zero shits about no one except maybe his brother and his sister-in-law.
“Probably not if she betrayed him that badly. But he’s probably still dealing with the after effects.”
“It’s been years,” I point out.
“Okay, but that doesn’t mean he’s healed. Especially if he hasn’t acknowledged the pain and hurt it caused him.”
I eye her warily. “You sure you don’t want to be a psychologist or something?”
Sadie laughs, leaning back. “I’m sure. I’ll stick with books and numbers over people’s drama any day. Yours is more than enough to keep me entertained.”
I draw my knees up, hugging them tightly to my chest. As much as I understood what Sadie was saying, I just couldn’t find it in me to feel sorry for Killian. Maybe if he wasn’t so damn aggravating, I wouldn’t have had to resort to stalking his ex. In fact, I sort of resent him for pushing me to even do something like that. He should have just been upfront with me from the start instead of playing games.
