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Turning around, he sensed the empty space. “Fanny?” He stood, getting off his knees, scowling. In the distance he could hear the steady fall of running feet.Good heavens,he thought, where had she run off to now?
CHAPTER11
Fanny stood in the dark corner of the hallway, trying to calm her breathing, clutching the tiny kitten to her chest. The kittenmeowedquietly, her little head poking out from the top of the blanket.
Fanny’s mind spun as she tried to slow her pounding heart. Percy had been so close to that fire. It was so large, so bright and red and orange. Fanny’s throat tightened at the thought of coming anywhere near a fire like that. She had come to be comfortable with small candle flames, but anything larger brought her anxiety and fear. She swallowed hard in an attempt to get rid of the feeling. She knew the effects a fire could have, the lives it could change and steal.
Footsteps echoed toward her in the dim light. The storm had started to calm outside, but the sky was still dark and grey.
“I’m sorry,” she half whispered. She could see Percy’s outline coming closer toward her. He stopped just in front of her. She wrapped her hand around his arm as she always did—just so he would know she was there. Fanny breathed a sigh of relief that he was all right. “I hate fires.”
Percy’s head tipped down closer to hers, every line etched in concern. “I see that now. I am sincerely sorry.”
Fanny shook her head. “No. They are necessary at times. I understand. You mustn’t apologize.”
One of his eyebrows twitched upward, as if he intended to pose a question, but something stopped him. “We’ll move the chairs farther away from the fireplace. You won’t be near the fire, but I will be at peace to know that you are at least somewhat warm.”
There was something about the thoughtfulness of his words and the look on his face that flooded her chest with warmth. She smiled. It was as if he had never pushed her away that morning. Perhaps nothing had changed after all. But the question still remained, tugging at her mind: what hadcausedhim to be so aloof?
When they returned to the drawing room, Fanny’s heart picked up speed again. The fire was growing, dancing off the bricks, licking the edges and threatening to spill over and engulf the house. She caught her breath, pushing old images away from her mind. Percy walked across the room and pulled both chairs back several paces, and they sat down. Fanny was much more comfortable here, but still, she couldn’t take her eyes off the fire. The kitten nestled its head into her collarbone. Fanny had nearly forgotten about her. She started to smile at the thought of what Percy would say when she offered him the kitten, but then Percy said something else.
“Why are you frightened by the fire?”
Fanny’s stomach dropped and she turned to look at him. His eyes were glowing deeper, as if searching for the things buried inside her—the things that didn’t require sight to find. “Are you still attempting to discover my true misfortunes?” she asked, trying to smile.
His lips twitched up at the corners. “If you feel compelled to tell me, I am always listening.”
She watched him carefully, heart beating fast, hands sweating. The kitten squirmed, but she kept it pressed against her. How would Percy react to the story? Should she tell him the truth—all of it? She stared at his face—the slope of his cheek and the line of his nose, the crease near his mouth when he smiled, the soft, youthful brow and the firm blue eyes. Would he understand? Could he ever think the same of her again? Would he ever love her? A small spark of hope lit within her when she realized that yes, it was possible. Becauseshelovedhim. She loved him despite every flaw. She loved every flaw. She would never change him. Her heart fluttered with new strength.
“It was three years ago,” she began in a shaky voice. “One of our maids had lit the fire just before we went to sleep. Her apron was hanging on the mantle, too close to the flames.” The images flashed in angry bursts, and Fanny tried to close her eyes against them. “No one awakened until the fire had burned the room and started up the stairs. Papa tried to help us out of the house but the fire moved so fast…” Fanny looked at the fireplace, at the flames that seemed to mock her, boasting of their power. “The stairs collapsed, trapping both of them. Mama and Papa. They told me to run, and I did.” Her breathing was coming faster now, and tears stung her eyes. Her body convulsed with a sob. “I l-left them there. I left them there to die. I d-didn’t know—I didn’t know how to help them. I found a room on the second floor with a window. But I was scared to jump, so I turned back to the door and opened it.”
Fanny swallowed hard, but tears still fell down her cheeks. Her voice shook. “The fire blew into the room the moment I opened the door, and—I was burned. My face. The fire was more frightening than the window at that moment…so I jumped.” Fanny was too afraid to look at Percy. “I broke my legs, but they have since healed. But my face never did, not completely. I had been engaged to a man that had always been a dear friend to me. After he knew what had happened to me, he called off our engagement. He didn’t want to be seen with me.Hedidn’t want to see me. I lost everything that was dear to me because of that fire. My parents. My betrothed. My home.” She drew a shaky breath and sniffed, lifting her sleeve, catching the tears that fell from her chin. “That is what led me to live with my grandmother. After my parents were taken from me, she was the only one who wanted me. And now she is gone too.”
Several beats of silence passed, and the temptation to look at Percy was too great. She glanced over at him. His expression, the raw grief displayed there, surprised her. He lifted his hand, and Fanny almost turned away. But in a strange impulse, she grasped his hand and guided it carefully to the right side of her face. She let go. “This is the scar from the fire,” she whispered. “My grandmother arranged this marriage to you because she knew that only a man who couldn’t see my face would ever marry me.” She broke her own heart saying those words aloud.
Percy’s fingers brushed her cheek, pausing on the puckered skin that formed the scars, tracing the lines as if she were the most fragile thing he had ever touched. Chills bounded over her skin and her heart picked up speed. He didn’t stop until his fingers traced the scar off the edge of her chin. She watched his eyes, which reflected emotion more than any other eyes could. But among it all, she never saw disappointment.
“Fanny…why didn’t you tell me before?” he asked. She had never heard a voice so gentle.
“You had more than enough reasons already to want to be rid of me.”
He shook his head. “I can think of nothing but all the reasons to keep you here and never let you leave. This changes nothing. And that man…he must have been mad.”
His words struck her, and her eyes flashed to him, begging for more, for an explanation.
The kitten let out a loud and rather triumphantmeow. Fanny looked down and laughed shakily, wiping away the last of her tears. The kitten had managed to escape the blanket and had a firm hold on Fanny’s collar with her claws.
Percy’s eyes flew open. “What thedevilwas that?”
“I had nearly forgotten about her.” Fanny sighed. “She was meant to be a surprise.”
Percy raised his eyebrows. “Have I told you that I don’t particularly like surprises?”
Fanny laughed, lifting the kitten away from her. “I am sure you get a lot of them.”
“Every time someone so much as speaks. But you didn’t answer my question. Whatwasthat?”
“Hold out your hands,” Fanny whispered. Percy threw her a skeptical look, but complied. Stifling a giggle, Fanny placed the kitten across his hands. “Introducing…Cake, the second.”
