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Chapter Eight
Eris
Now I’d never rest.
My clothing still lay where I’d left it, but it could remain there for a while longer.
I would have gone right to bed, and indeed that had been my plan so that I would be at least somewhat rested for my day’s work, but my encounter with my would-be mate had taken away the sense of peace my moon bath had bestowed. If I lay in my bedding now, I’d be awake until morning. Instead of that frustrating time-waste, I decided to do something else.
Something not approved of by the elders—as if I cared what they thought. They were selfish and cared only for themselves, or so it appeared. No, they did not live in luxury because no one could do that now. But they managed to take just a little better care of them and theirs and were also very bossy.
The Prophesy was about looking forward and upward. It offered a promise of a future, while our pack seemed to be accepting that things were spiraling downward and one day we’d all just die. Which, of course, we would, but they saw it as depressing and inevitably coming soon as limited resources waned and then disappeared. It was one bleak and dismal way to see things and made everyone unhappy.
I refused to accept that there was nothing ahead. The future was not determined, it presented opportunities, and those came from decisions made. Decisions made to bring our pack and any others who wanted to join with us into brighter future. Oh, I didn’t pretend that we’d have cities and rolling farmland like in the few books we had, but that was the past.
We had the ability to write the future.
But the one time I’d tried to share my vision, I’d been laughed at and then chastised for foolishness. Accused of refusing to accept the reality that faced us and in doing so, being a rebel. I didn’t mind being called a rebel; I minded being part of a completely depressing reality. We had a lot of challenges, but if we just accepted the worst possible existence, why even continue to live?
Few joys were ours to embrace. One of which I was about to leap into.
Closing my eyes, I willed the shift, feeling its changes come over my body almost immediately. Warmth surrounded me. Why didn’t people spend as much time as possible in fur at night when it was so cold? It wasn’t a strict rule but, again, when I’d tried to creep into my shared shelter in fur one night, the outrage of the others had driven me out again. And since my fur wasn’t enough to be exposed all night while sleeping, I had to comply.
But for tonight, and many others, I would go out onto the plain and run off the stress and frustration of life in this pack. The elders “preferred” we only do that as a group or at least with several others, but others so rarely cared to run, and if they did, it was with an air of resignation like:My wolf insisted we go out, so let’s make it fast.
Fast…I liked fast. But not as in a short and unsatisfying run. All we had that was not limited by our resources was the ability to race under the moon. And while I did not admit it to anyone because they probably would feel it selfish, sometimes I even managed to hunt down a rabbit or small rodent for a snack. It helped a lot to get through on the limited pack rations. And any one of my pack mates could do the same, so my wolf refused to allow me to get too wound up about it.
They are lazy. They don’t deserve to eat.My wolf was big on telling it as she saw it.
But I wouldn’t take it that far…or argue with her because I was darn close to sharing her opinion.
My fur had thickened over the months and years in response to the changing nighttime temperatures, and as I bounded out of the copse and onto the open land, I was grateful for the cushion of it between my toes. One of the reasons the others didn’t like to go out was because they were not nearly as fluffy, and their feet burned from the icy ground. I’d stopped running with others, except for the required full-pack runs largely due to their complaints about my coat and how it was unfair that I was not as cold as them.
I didn’t point out that if they got off their butts more often and let their wolf adapt to the climate, it might go better for them. Why waste my breath?
Tonight, not a cloud marred the sky, and the moon was still overhead as I loped away from the oasis and out onto the open plain. The elders warned of dangers like predators, but they seemed to forget we were apex predators ourselves. There were few bigger or faster than us out there now, maybe the occasional cougar who could outrun us, but if we were alert, we could see something coming from far away. And cougars didn’t want to tangle with us, really anyway. It could lead to injuries that they didn’t want to risk.
On a night like tonight, with bright moonlight, I almost thought I could run so far, I never needed to go back. But where would I end up? The pack part of my personality didn’t want to live alone, and the other packs we came in contact with seemed no better than ours.
There had to be a better place and more positive people. Some who wouldn’t suck the life out of me by their total negativity and hopelessness.
I ran until I was tired then dropped on my belly, tongue lolling out, and watched the constellations wheel above me. The moon had dropped near the horizon, allowing the sparking jewels to show through more clearly, but something was off. I couldn’t quite pin it down, although a flicker of hope deep inside me lit at the thought it might be my mate.
Just the eternal optimist, that’s what I was. Foolish optimism, likely.
With the cold from the ground seeping into my body, the eastern sky lightening, and the moon to the west, I pushed to my feet and started for home. I hadn’t found a thing to eat along the way, but it was all right. I didn’t always, and my stomach was well acquainted with hunger.
I had no time left to sleep, but that was fine as well. Sometimes a run was better than bed. I’d tried to memorize the changed star positions so I could consult the star charts as well. It meant something for sure. I just didn’t know what.
The rest of the pack was rising when I slipped into the copse, shifted, and dressed, hoping nobody had noticed me coming across the plain. But when I emerged, a certain male was lingering in the doorway of his shelter, a smirk twisting his fleshy lips.
Perfect.
